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The Gay Gene Debate

How old are your kids chichi? They sound so cute. I hope I get kids one day.

I don't think no one chooses how they want to be, It just is. I have a very close experience about that very thing. My bestest friend. We have known each other for ages. 9 years ago we started to hang out. We were very close. Hang out together every day. We could just sit and talk for hours and hours. We did everything together. Went to holiday, sleepovers and did what most friends do. Except for one thing. While I was chasing guys, she never did. In fact, she wasn't even interested in any of them. She is one of those gorgeous girls with long hair. Slim. Blue eyes. A lovely lady. Of course I thought it was weird that she wasn't interested in neither one of the guys that approached her. (she was very popular among the guys, you know. And some of them got so frustrated when they were turned down, my god LOL) I just thought she waited for the best man to come along. So while she comforted me when I went through my heartaches (lol) I never heard her speak of one.

I began to wonder of course. Could she be liking girls instead? But how do you ask your best friend "are you gay?". I pretended I was just imagining things and that she prolly went through some sort of phase or something. She is a very sensitive girl and I guess I wasn't brave enough to ask her. I think I was afraid to hurt her feelings. What if I was wrong?

I was kinda lucky though. I never had to ask her if she was gay or not. She told me herself 5 years ago. She told me that she had met someone. Someone nice. And she said she hoped I wasn't going to be upset, because she was very much in love. At that moment I know she didn't have to say anything more. I knew her "boyfriend" was a girlfriend=) I remember I said to her that you have found a girlfriend, haven't you. She said yes. And I said I have always knew you were into girls. I said I was so happy for her that she had finally found someone, because we all need love. We cried and laughed and hugged. I guess we were so relieved that it was finally said. She was more relieved than me of course, but I was happy that I wasn't imagining things and that I actually had known for a very long time. That I wasn't that off when it came to someone I care deeply about.

On top of that, her girlfriend is very nice. Although she is my bestfriend's girlfriend, I got a brand new friend 5 years ago.

She has joked and said to me "Marie, you are the most heterosexual person I know." I'm like "what you mean?". Well, she said, If you had one interest in girls, don't you think we would have went to bed together a long time ago!"
We have laughed a lot about that. She's kinda right, thinking about in our early 20's when we had all those sleepovers and holiday together.

I'm so happy that more and more countries have equal rights for everyone. Because it's all about loving somebody and being who you are.
 
mariemarie said:
How old are your kids chichi? They sound so cute. I hope I get kids one day.

I don't think no one chooses how they want to be, It just is. I have a very close experience about that very thing. My bestest friend. We have known each other for ages. 9 years ago we started to hang out. We were very close. Hang out together every day. We could just sit and talk for hours and hours. We did everything together. Went to holiday, sleepovers and did what most friends do. Except for one thing. While I was chasing guys, she never did. In fact, she wasn't even interested in any of them. She is one of those gorgeous girls with long hair. Slim. Blue eyes. A lovely lady. Of course I thought it was weird that she wasn't interested in neither one of the guys that approached her. (she was very popular among the guys, you know. And some of them got so frustrated when they were turned down, my god LOL) I just thought she waited for the best man to come along. So while she comforted me when I went through my heartaches (lol) I never heard her speak of one.

I began to wonder of course. Could she be liking girls instead? But how do you ask your best friend "are you gay?". I pretended I was just imagining things and that she prolly went through some sort of phase or something. She is a very sensitive girl and I guess I wasn't brave enough to ask her. I think I was afraid to hurt her feelings. What if I was wrong?

I was kinda lucky though. I never had to ask her if she was gay or not. She told me herself 5 years ago. She told me that she had met someone. Someone nice. And she said she hoped I wasn't going to be upset, because she was very much in love. At that moment I know she didn't have to say anything more. I knew her "boyfriend" was a girlfriend=) I remember I said to her that you have found a girlfriend, haven't you. She said yes. And I said I have always knew you were into girls. I said I was so happy for her that she had finally found someone, because we all need love. We cried and laughed and hugged. I guess we were so relieved that it was finally said. She was more relieved than me of course, but I was happy that I wasn't imagining things and that I actually had known for a very long time. That I wasn't that off when it came to someone I care deeply about.

On top of that, her girlfriend is very nice. Although she is my bestfriend's girlfriend, I got a brand new friend 5 years ago.

She has joked and said to me "Marie, you are the most heterosexual person I know." I'm like "what you mean?". Well, she said, If you had one interest in girls, don't you think we would have went to bed together a long time ago!"
We have laughed a lot about that. She's kinda right, thinking about in our early 20's when we had all those sleepovers and holiday together.

I'm so happy that more and more countries have equal rights for everyone. Because it's all about loving somebody and being who you are.
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that is a lovely story :)
my second cousin is gay and she was shy about telling me at first, im not sure why. just like your friend, she told me a few years ago by saying she had found a girlfriend, i have to say i wasnt expecting it but i was happy for her. sadly it didnt last though, they broke up after a year
 
laurenjayne said:
that is a lovely story :)
my second cousin is gay and she was shy about telling me at first, im not sure why. just like your friend, she told me a few years ago by saying she had found a girlfriend, i have to say i wasnt expecting it but i was happy for her. sadly it didnt last though, they broke up after a year
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Thanks. Breakup happens. But at least she told you. I think she is very happy about that.
Love isn't easy though. No matter if you're straight, gay, bi or whatnot. Love is though, but aaah so nice!
 
chichi and mariemarie your stories were both heartbreaking and lovely (if that even makes sense :blush: ) :lol: thanks for sharing. :huggy:
 
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he is certainly a 'Gay Friendly' Artist

simply by presenting himself as he chooses. His individualistic charisma, is a force that draws people to him :)

but many fans are very protective of his 'sexuality'. Or inferring that he is 'gay' in any way ...
 
MJJChichi said:
do we have any heterosexuals that chose to be heterosexual ?? :)
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LOL... that's a great question.

I've come to the conclusion that I ain't none of these things, lol. I'm just "me".

Nothing in my life really prepared me for either the "heterosexual" life or the "homosexual" one. I find myself very tolerant to all sorts of people at a very young age and found myself attracted sexually to both males and females that it really hasn't become as much of an issue. This is why I don't understand people bashing others because of who they choose to be with.

That's just my belief anyhow.

Nor do I think it's a choice or a genetic thing, like Little Richard once said, "I don't practice who I am".
 
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oooo now i have another Lil Richard quote to use :clapping:

Til now, I have only used the 'Shut Up' quote LMFGAO ... I love the way he says that !!

**pause**

**the look**

SHUT UP !!

:lol: I love it when he does that :lol:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=CHVErY4RcO8
 
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troubleman84 said:
LOL... that's a great question.

I've come to the conclusion that I ain't none of these things, lol. I'm just "me".

Nothing in my life really prepared me for either the "heterosexual" life or the "homosexual" one. I find myself very tolerant to all sorts of people at a very young age and found myself attracted sexually to both males and females that it really hasn't become as much of an issue. This is why I don't understand people bashing others because of who they choose to be with.

That's just my belief anyhow.

Nor do I think it's a choice or a genetic thing, like Little Richard once said, "I don't practice who I am".
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People bash or get angry about things they don't know or don't understand, because it's an easy response. Whether it be fear of the unknown or anger at the challenge for them to think about a topic/idea that has what they feel "nothing to do with them".
The simple truth is, people are lazy. If it's not about them they don't care. Or they care enough to make sure it doesn't become about them.
 
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hihihi at Little Richard. :dancin:

Talking about gay friendly artists, Prince is the man. My man that is (?)
He's got that hot sexy attractiveness in an androgyne way but at the same time he's all man. Now that's hot :lol::punk:
 
I believe it's a combination of many things..


We are born with a specific genetic code, all of us have different hormones, and just overall created VERY different. There are people that have a very strong sex drive, some less. etc.. Even in the same sex prefrence, there is different desires..

Now I think there are things that people are born with that make a person more willing to become gay. Then physcologically the invironment effects the person to have that area triggered more or less, depending on everything that person is made of and the reaction to it..

I'll use myself as an example.. I am straight.. But I have seen men that I know and see as attractive. 'He's a good looking guy'. But nothing triggers me to be sexually interested in that person..

You know women that stare at another woman that is good looking, and starts to stare, and get angry at her for looking so damn good.. lol! That woman does not get sexually aroused by that person..



I mean... it's hard to expaine exactly what I believe.. The mind is very complex.. Do I think people just one day decide, yep I'll be gay?? no!! Do I think people are born to be gay?? no!!..

The mind can be triggered in ways we don't fully understand. Take Michael Jackson as an example (just the way the mind works) was he a great dancer and artist when he was born?? NO!! Was he born with things in the brain that would enable him to become that? YES!! If his surroundings never allowed him to florish in those artistic abilities he'd never reached his potential..

That same mind thing goes in EVERYTHING.. craving, style, sexual desire, food likings, things you're good at in school, fantacies.. etc..


From inteligent beings to serial killers.. We are all born with things that can DEVELOPE into a specific type of person, as long as the surroundings and environment enabals it.

This is not just about 'gay'.. It's just how the mind works..
 
being gay is not a choice your born that way you cant help who you love no one can if god made you that way thats how your suppose to be
 
You're either gay or you're not. Simple as that. If, as a straight person, you didn't choose your attraction.... then why would anyone believe that a gay person does? It's all so silly. Just think.
 
^ Believe it or not, there are people who say they choose to be "normal" = straight :rolleyes: As dumb as it may sound, I've heard it too many times
 
certainly there are gay people that choose to live a straight life ... they force themselves to do so. Thinking the 'Gay' will somehow be washed away. There are people who have been brought up so against a person being anything but a heterosexual, that they choose to do what they know is expected of them. They date the opposite sex, form 'relationships', build lives with their heterosexual partner, get married, have a family together ... seemingly being what they knew was expected of them to do. Are they happy that way ... maybe a little but not really, truly happy, no.

Flip it the other way, all your childhood you are taught that being 'Gay' is what you are expected to be. However, you are different ... for some reason, you are attracted to the opposite sex :eek: In an effort to please people, your family, society, you continue on as a 'gay' person. you find a person of the same sex, date, build a relationship, get married(it would be allowed/legal if homosexuality was the 'Norm'), you have a family together ... would you be happy in that life ?? Keep in mind you are in reality a heterosexual living as a Homosexual, for appearance sake.

Yes, i know, it sounds preposterous. guess what, it sounds the same way to us :)
 
no one can point it 100% as BORN that way or CHOSEN.. This has been a challenge for scientists and psychologists for YEARS..

It's not a simple YES or NO answere.. If it were, there would be no debate.

In my understanding, it's BOTH.. To some it's more towards born that way, and some more chose to be.. But it's not JUST one..
 
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then I guess the same amount of heterosexual must have chosen to be heterosexual *shrug*

when exactly did yall sign on the dotted line and agree to be straight ?? was there a meeting that I missed ?? Is that why I 'opted' for the crooked road ?? :( Nobody ever gave me an option ... If I had only been around for that darn meeting. :mat:
 
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I never thought that genes can have any debates

The more you live the more you learn
a030.gif
 
Honestly I don't know who came up with that "straight" bullsh*t. Like I said before, I just don't like labels, man. We come to this world as the same and emerge as completely different people.

Love is universal, it's not genetic, lol. I don't think one chooses to do it either. Everyone has an ambiguous side to themselves so we shouldn't surprise who chooses to be with the same sex or opposite sex or the sexes in between.

That's why prejudice is a b***h.
 
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the logical debate shouldn't be about whether people "choose", but how much environmental (or conditioning) factors play in determining sexual orientation in different people alongside genetics. and you really don't get to choose in either case.

and i don't see the difference between staunch supporters of homosexuality proclaiming that you're "born this way" from the ignorant masses that say it's a "choice" when both don't have any scientific backing to support their claims. we now already that it's not as black and white as this.


tman said:
We come to this world as the same and emerge as completely different people.
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at the level of the topic in question, i'd have to disagree with you there mate.
 
arXter said:
the logical debate shouldn't be about whether people "choose", but how much environmental (or conditioning) factors play in determining sexual orientation in different people alongside genetics. and you really don't get to choose in either case.

and i don't see the difference between staunch supporters of homosexuality proclaiming that you're "born this way" from the ignorant masses that say it's a "choice" when both don't have any scientific backing to support their claims. we now already that it's not as black and white as this.



at the level of the topic in question, i'd have to disagree with you there mate.
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LOL, the way this topic has been discussed, I don't blame you for not agreeing with me on that statement. :)
 
BUT I do agree with you that we have no proof that it's either a genetic thing or a choice. I feel you just are who you are. Society has been so f**ked up that we're machined to believe what we read and what we hear.
 
environment effects the mind so much.. Some don't give it enough credit.. We are ALL products of our environment.. Yes we are naturally built (born) in ways that will effect how we react TO the environment..

Yes we even find our sexual identities in it. Many fetishes, love making styles, the way we react with people both male and female, and SO MUCH is effected by environment..


One example of how a person reacts to environment sexually:

A young man has a agressive and abusive father which be littles what that young man thinks of himself, and his comfort level around other people. This young man becomes shy, and allows people to somewhat push him around to please people.. But of course he has that drive and hunger to FEEL equal, and/or in charge in someway. That could come out through sex, and finds a partner who allows him to be the leader in the bed. May boss his partner around, may do specific things (without getting graphic) that would be-little his partner..


**That was just one example of several study cases that have accored**


As people we spend our whole lives trying to work and figure ourselves out, let alone tell others what makes him/her who they are.. non of us fully know the TRUTH and correct answeres..

That's why science is not dead, because there is ALWAYS something new to learn.
 
BONGANI said:
People are born gay, it cant be no choice, I've seen young children as young as 6, already showing blatant femine tendacies.
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if that's true, how come the gay people haven't extinct because they can't multipily ?
 
You have never met a gay person that has children ?? Where do you live ??

Regardless, just because you are gay doesn't mean, that any child you have will be gay also. That thought process is beyond ............ nevermind, that would be rude of me to say :innocent: Both my parents are more than Heterosexual and they produced one very Gay son. I've had five children, three blood and two adopted. The only one that shows any signs of a possible 'Gayness' factor, is one of the adopted children. So even if I never had any children that were my blood, I would still possibly be raising a 'gay' child ... it would have had nothing to do with my DNA.
 
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My parents are both 'straight' to use a label, and they produced me ('gay'), and a 'straight' brother and sister also. Same genes, same environment.

I believe genetics have the majority to do with how someone turns out, but yes, environment also will have an effect. Their are plenty of "Gay" pornstars who are actually 'straight' for a graphic example.
The genetic portion is the same as who comes out left and right handed, who has freckles, why a mole decided to grow there. It is all perfectly natural, and has been happening since the dawn of humans, and it's only the Western Culture of recent times that has labelled it, packaged it, and decided what was the "RIGHT WAY" and what was the "WRONG/BAD WAY". So many cultures have had homosexuality exist in it, with no problems! Animals also can show this behaviour, with no problems!

It aint goin away, so people will just get used to it again one day.

And for the record, I can't wait to marry and have kids! Already engaged!
 
Parmenid said:
yes, but, dont use it
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if Google wasn't infested with biblical homophobic nonsense to dig through, i'd have found you a nice and simple expert explanation to debunk your black and white thinking.

but alas you get to meet a prime example in this very forum
f_smiley.gif
:

MJJChichi said:
Both my parents are more than Heterosexual and they produced one very Gay son. I've had five children, three blood and two adopted.
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cheers for sharing.
 
QPerth said:
My parents are both 'straight' to use a label, and they produced me ('gay'), and a 'straight' brother and sister also. Same genes, same environment.

I believe genetics have the majority to do with how someone turns out, but yes, environment also will have an effect. Their are plenty of "Gay" pornstars who are actually 'straight' for a graphic example.
The genetic portion is the same as who comes out left and right handed, who has freckles, why a mole decided to grow there. It is all perfectly natural, and has been happening since the dawn of humans, and it's only the Western Culture of recent times that has labelled it, packaged it, and decided what was the "RIGHT WAY" and what was the "WRONG/BAD WAY". So many cultures have had homosexuality exist in it, with no problems! Animals also can show this behaviour, with no problems!

It aint goin away, so people will just get used to it again one day.

And for the record, I can't wait to marry and have kids! Already engaged!
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:yes: Society has acted so stupid to different types of sexuality. Homosexuality is a natural feeling.
 
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