Merged: Psychics channel Michael

[Louise.]

Kira, welcome back! :flowers:

 

[mjbunny]

Hi Kira!

MJJLaugh - Weird about the sunny day. For me I've always had the feeling that when I go it will be on a sunny day with those little fluffy cottonwood seeds blowing around in the air. I wonder if there's anything to that.

Oh, and the subject of "new fans", yeah, what Mrs Music said! I felt that a bit last spring when I joined MJJC because there was a big influx of people signing up around the O2 announcement. And that means we're all "getting on the bandwagon" right? :rolleyes2: Not everyone spends their day on forums. People have jobs and families and many just don't really know what they'd talk about. I found one called MJIFC when I first got online back in '96/'97 and was a occasionally-active member until they closed in 2002. In the years between I had digest/news updates and my own personal 24/7 MJ-obsessed guy to keep me updated on everything :lol:. And even if I had been a new fan who just discovered MJ that week... so? And especially now... geez! I want his legacy to last forever. I want people to love him forever. We "old fans" aren't going to live forever, so that means new generations need to discover Michael and wth is wrong with sharing the love and the joy and the wonder with people who might even be older than you are just now realizing how amazing he is? Nothing! But people have the same attitude of "never forgive" toward just about everyone. If someone ever did or said anything against Michael, it doesn't matter if they come crawling on the ground in tears, apologizing and kissing our feet, we still hate them. It seems that way. One thing getting older teaches you is: people change. I'd hate to be forever judged on something I said 15 years ago :rolleyes2: Ok, enough of that rant :lol:

About spirit guides ... do you all feel like you have several or one or do they change? I had this weird anti-spirit-guide thing going on until about 10 years ago. Like, I believed I must have them, but for some reason I didn't want to meet them. I guess I felt I should handle everything myself, without anyone's input. Ok, maybe I was scared a bit of getting too personal with the folks who see all my stupid errors too :lol: Like, my whole life I've never felt alone. I just never feel alone. If I do something stupid like fall down or choke on a grape and no one's around... oh, I know someone knows. :cheeky: That's been that way since I can remember. Even in the worst moments, when I feel "completely alone", it's not really completely alone. It's more like... fine, just ignore me then! I guess I'm supposed to suffer by myself! :doh: So far, I've found 4 guides, one of them helps with connecting with spirits (met him last summer) and another has 'replaced' one I've worked with for years just in the past few months. I also share one with hubby, which I found really interesting when we were like, "Whoa!" Makes it sound more likely to be real then. Or I'm making them up as aspects of my mind to give me info from my higher self. :lol: I don't know. Don't think that's the case, though. Hmmm. I liked that article in that it inferred there could be many, not just the one. I never noticed just one. Maybe it depends on whether a person prefers to work with just one consciously or is ok with several? And who knows, maybe there are 10 others nearby on a special call list, lol. Don't know.

Oh, and when I go to see them in my mind they're always standing in the same "positions". One sort of behind me to the left. One ahead and to the left and then the other two ahead and to the right. Always the same positions. Maybe I'm just weird? It must signify something, you know. I asked recently, but I was so tired I can't be sure of the answer.

 

[8701girl]

I want to know how I will die too, but all I know is that I will die suddenly, on a sunny day, either an accident or a heart attack or something like that. And I know won't grow old...
( I know the "sudden death", "sunny day" and "not old" for 'facts'), the cause is speculation.
I am not getting any answers on that one at all. Not supposed to know I guess....

I try not to think how im going to die...it scares me way too much.

 

[PaceMioDolceCuore]

...MJJLaugh - Weird about the sunny day. For me I've always had the feeling that when I go it will be on a sunny day with those little fluffy cottonwood seeds blowing around in the air. I wonder if there's anything to that.

Interesting... I always knew I'm gonna die healthy as a horse at a ripe age, something like 80. It'll be a long time from now and that scares me more sometimes than if I were to die tomorrow...
All I knew is that I have drowned once in the past, don't know the circumstances, I just know I drowned. But I love the water and ocean, I loooooove being near water yet I drowned somewhere.

Oh, and the subject of "new fans", yeah, what Mrs Music said! I felt that a bit last spring when I joined MJJC because there was a big influx of people signing up around the O2 announcement. And that means we're all "getting on the bandwagon" right? :rolleyes2: Not everyone spends their day on forums. People have jobs and families and many just don't really know what they'd talk about. I found one called MJIFC when I first got online back in '96/'97 and was a occasionally-active member until they closed in 2002. In the years between I had digest/news updates and my own personal 24/7 MJ-obsessed guy to keep me updated on everything :lol:. And even if I had been a new fan who just discovered MJ that week... so? And especially now... geez! I want his legacy to last forever. I want people to love him forever. We "old fans" aren't going to live forever, so that means new generations need to discover Michael and wth is wrong with sharing the love and the joy and the wonder with people who might even be older than you are just now realizing how amazing he is? Nothing! But people have the same attitude of "never forgive" toward just about everyone. If someone ever did or said anything against Michael, it doesn't matter if they come crawling on the ground in tears, apologizing and kissing our feet, we still hate them. It seems that way. One thing getting older teaches you is: people change. I'd hate to be forever judged on something I said 15 years ago :rolleyes2: Ok, enough of that rant :lol:

Yeah, no kidding... To me it's even more fascinating that so many people newly discovered Michael. Because it means he's relevant- not only as an artist, but much more than that. It means that people have discovered something in themselves that they recognizes in him- and the other way around. People feel drawn to him because he is an incredible mirror of mankind. This whole child m******* cr*p only happened because a)people like to extort money without having to work for it and b)because some sick folks projected their own sick minds onto him.

But he's also the blessing, the channel that things came through artistically. And by God, I'd kill for his abilities, really. People rave and rave about him- but I just understood it once more. He wasn't known to be an incredible virtuoso on any musical instrument, but GOOD GOD, this man has a creative vision that's just mindboggeling.
I was just sifting through hundreds of videos to cut my own video- and %^&*, just seeing slide after slide of videos broken up into half seconds- pure GENIUS. I just really got that cutting through big chunks of Moonwalker and Ghosts. What a vision- and I genuinely mourn the fact that we don't get to see the the movies he would have directed- with his music possibly. Aside from all all the personal uproar, the questionable way he died, his children, his humanitarian impact.

People are incredibly drawn to him because he represented all of humankind's possibilities- that's why all the "new" followers. That's a GREAT thing and it's about time people understood that it's an honor for someone to exude that kind of draw and presence even in and after death, that this being is having on us- not a shame. He's still working his magic- from a different place. He's exerting his influence from the other side- and this is exactly why people have been responding to him in droves!

 

[mjbunny]

Interesting... I always knew I'm gonna die healthy as a horse at a ripe age, something like 80. It'll be a long time from now and that scares me more sometimes than if I were to die tomorrow... All I knew is that I have drowned once in the past, don't know the circumstances, I just know I drowned. But I love the water and ocean, I loooooove being near water yet I drowned somewhere.

I think dying from anesthesia is a very "good" death compared what some ppl go through. It is MUCH better than to die from cancer. My mother died from cancer. Terrible. There are no too many good deaths though. Very often ppl die from something they afraid of the most. You said that you asked many times and never got a real answer. I believe that most of times this information has to be closed because ppl will try to avoid it.

Interesting, both of you. I always thought I'd live to be in my mid-60's. That's it. Even when I was a kid I thought that. People would say, "Nah, life expectancy for your generation should be like 80!" But no, mid-60's. Considering the state of things, it will most likely be sooner than that and from quite mundane health problems, not from being hunted down by illuminati spies and assassinated for writing the book that changes the world, lol. (I suppose the anesthesia complications is still a possibility, though. My sister's friend died of that in her mid-20's a few years ago. :no: She went in for a routine laparascopy for gall bladder and never came home.)

I was thinking a lot lately of this: Imagine a long-term (way long term, I guess) study asking thousands of people over the age of 20 when they think they're going to die and if they have any idea how. (Maybe ask again every 10 years to see if their idea changes, too.) And then wait and see how many are right. I heard a radio show with George Carlin not too long before he died of sudden heart failure at the age of 71. He said his whole life he's just known somehow that he'd live to be 80-something. I think he said 82 or 87. Just convinced of it. Oooops! My mom always thought she'd die before she was 40. Always thought it. Now she's 60. Thankfully another ooops. I'd love to know how many of us are right. My mom thinks we'd mostly all be wrong, but there are many anecdotal cases that seem to say otherwise. I really wonder.

P.S. Asedora, of course I totally agree about dying from anesthesia. That sounds much better than being shot. Or cancer (so sorry about your mother :hug. That's one of those things that I'm thankful for, if one can find a way to be 'thankful' ... that for Michael it was basically what we'd all wish for, to go to sleep and that's that (although not so damned young ). Imagine if he'd been stabbed or shot or blown up or died in a car or plane accident. We'd have been thinking about those last moments with so much pain, for the fear and/or pain he'd gone through :no: Many people have to think of loved ones like that. Some horrifically. Sorry, I hope I'm not bringing something terrible up for anyone. Just... things I think of.

 

[CaptainEoLove85]

MJJLaugh, your story of being a "newer" fan reminds me of my own. :huggy: It doesn't matter, and I think you're doing a great job on the legacy project.

On the subject of death, I don't think I'd want to know how I'd die because then I'd probably spend my whole life trying to avoid it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid to die (I know I'd be with Michael then :wub, but I just don't think it's meant to be known how you die.

I also can't see myself living to a ripe old age either. I just can't imagine it. And I think the worst thing would be to suffer before you die. That's what happened to my grandma. She couldn't breathe and I'll never get that image out of my mind of her skeletal body. And I think that was a couple of weeks before she passed. I'd never wish that upon anyone, to have to go through a painful dying process. Would be nice if everyone could just die peacefully in their sleep wouldn't it?

Ok, I think this is getting a bit grim. :mello:

 

[MJJLaugh]

I was thinking a lot lately of this: Imagine a long-term (way long term, I guess) study asking thousands of people over the age of 20 when they think they're going to die and if they have any idea how. (Maybe ask again every 10 years to see if their idea changes, too.) And then wait and see how many are right. I heard a radio show with George Carlin not too long before he died of sudden heart failure at the age of 71. He said his whole life he's just known somehow that he'd live to be 80-something. I think he said 82 or 87. Just convinced of it. Oooops! My mom always thought she'd die before she was 40. Always thought it. Now she's 60. Thankfully another ooops. I'd love to know how many of us are right. My mom thinks we'd mostly all be wrong, but there are many anecdotal cases that seem to say otherwise. I really wonder.

Ok, last thing I'm going to say on this subject, before it indeed gets too morbid.
That would be a very interesting study to conduct, however, I think most peeps would get the dates or ages wrong, since time does not exist on the other side.
So I think the most that we can know is certain circumstances, as they may linger from the life's preview before we were born, but since life's preview movie is hardly likely to be date-stamped, it will be mostly impossible to know when we die, which is a good thing if you ask me, because if we knew when it would hamper the "live consciously in the NOW". If you knew that date you'd start living towards it, not so much focused anymore on the here and now.
But I agree, when you are terminally ill, it will come to mind, and even then people will not know when they die a (natural) death.

Thank you for your kind words on the newer fans. It's all about the intention and the focus, and not so much about who has been a fan the longest, therefore loving Michael the most. My love for him was sudden, swift and deep, but more importantly unconditional. Unconditional love does not ask, does not beg, does not writhe with passion, does not kill, does not make one jealous, but shares the joy with like-minded souls of a deep connection that serves a purpose and as Michael says so eloquently "only asks to be lived".
It is the deepest, purest, giving, forever-love there is, and that's how I feel.


As for the spirit guides I think most people have more than one, but everyone has one Guardian Angel. I asked how many I have and intuitively I knew/heard/felt I have 3 spirit guides, at the moment.

About spirit guides and angels, that reminds me of something else I wanted to share with you. I have read the book "Angels in my Hair" by Lorna Byrne, and some of her descriptions of angels started me thinking if Michael could see angels. The reason I thought that was because with certain descriptions by the author, I immediately thought of Michael in the video "Rock With You" and also "Will You Be There" came to mind, especially when the angel wraps her golden wings around him. Or maybe he met them during astral travels.

 

[Mundy]

Oh no, that sucks Why THAT day, right?! Hubby also got stuck with an appointment he's been waiting for forever on the 25th. But at least that's just for a couple of hours and then we can head to Cologne. :doh:

Oh crap, that sucks! I think loads of us will have a hard day doing things they don't wanna do then though. You'll be fine in the end, and the fact you're getting a new house is pretty cool I think? Or didn't you want to move? Either way, hope you'll be able to get through the day and to do all that you wanted to do regarding Michael. :better:

Thanks gals :huggy: I rang my mam about it yesterday and she said 'Oh well that would really be the Mike house then wouldn't it?' I guess it cheered me up a bit but it's the wrong date. 29th August would have been a good one. I think I'm gonna just go with it. This must be the way it was supposed to happen. I can spend the whole week blasting MJ while I pack, settle into my new house on friday and have a good memory to go with the bad one for that date.

As for the spirit guides I think most people have more than one, but everyone has one Guardian Angel. I asked how many I have and intuitively I knew/heard/felt I have 3 spirit guides, at the moment.

About spirit guides and angels, that reminds me of something else I wanted to share with you. I have read the book "Angels in my Hair" by Lorna Byrne, and some of her descriptions of angels started me thinking if Michael could see angels. The reason I thought that was because with certain descriptions by the author, I immediately thought of Michael in the video "Rock With You" and also "Will You Be There" came to mind, especially when the angel wraps her golden wings around him. Or maybe he met them during astral travels.

That sounds interesting. I haven't read the book but I just put it on my list.

I think we have more than one spirit guide. I only met one so far but I read I should leave it at one at the start and invite more in later. One day I felt three guides around me but I didn't do anything about it.

I read that spirit guides like attention (eg. Naming something after your spirit guide and show it off to people or something. I can't remember where I read that) When I met mine I asked for a name, concentrated really hard and got nothing. So I let it go, just lay on the bed for a minute and I heard "Don't tell anyone but my name is _____". Another thing I read was that you have to be discriminative when guides show up. You should ask them questions, set an easy task for them, etc. I wonder if the guide was testing me? Or maybe they just know whether or not I could be trusted.


:heart: to all

 

[MJJLaugh]

Thanks gals :huggy: I rang my mam about it yesterday and she said 'Oh well that would really be the Mike house then wouldn't it?' I guess it cheered me up a bit but it's the wrong date. 29th August would have been a good one. I think I'm gonna just go with it. This must be the way it was supposed to happen. I can spend the whole week blasting MJ while I pack, settle into my new house on friday and have a good memory to go with the bad one for that date.

I hope your move will go smoothly. Just focus on friday being a good day to move, rather than it being June 25th. A new home is exciting, isn't ?

I read that spirit guides like attention (eg. Naming something after your spirit guide and show it off to people or something. I can't remember where I read that) When I met mine I asked for a name, concentrated really hard and got nothing. So I let it go, just lay on the bed for a minute and I heard "Don't tell anyone but my name is _____". Another thing I read was that you have to be discriminative when guides show up. You should ask them questions, set an easy task for them, etc. I wonder if the guide was testing me? Or maybe they just know whether or not I could be trusted.


:heart: to all

I hadn't even thought of asking their names! I asked for their names but I didn't hear anything. I will ask another time and concentrate on it. I have too much things I need to do at the moment. I guess they especially like undivided attention!
At least I remembered to thank them for helping me in getting peace of mind.

 

[mjbunny]

Good morning, Harmony Hut :heart: (That's right Bianca, it's almost 3pm. Morning. :lol LOL, Germany is losing so far in today's World Cup game. Husbunny and the swarm of vuvuzelas are going crazy

Still no MJ dreams for me It feels like he's quite ... distant, busy, something. I guess that makes sense, considering. How are you all holding up? I've cried some times the past few days, but I'm not sinking into that deep, deep sadness when I do. Seem to recover quickly. It's kind of surprising. But then in a couple of days we're coming up to the day I had this dream no and that's probably going to mess me up

Speaking of dreams, though, had one this morning :lol: Someone (don't know who) explained to me that ... hmm, how do I say it without being too graphic?... that our spirit always seeks the spark of life, the light of creation. And that spark is contained within the physical start of life... the sperm and eggs, like little divine photons of life, like microcosms of heaven itself, which is what creates a new life. And so that's why we all want... you know what you want. It's not just a physical drive to procreate. Take that out of the equation and it's about wanting the light. So it's not about the donut, but really it's the filling that we're after :hysterical: And in the dream this was like some kind of amazing information to get. When I woke up I was like, ok, there might be some mystical truth to that, but really... ummm, there's a very physical drive headed up by hormones and it sounds like an excuse to watch TWYMMF live in Warsaw and pretend it's not the shiny pants that are captivating me :blush: :lol:

Thank you for your kind words on the newer fans. It's all about the intention and the focus, and not so much about who has been a fan the longest, therefore loving Michael the most. My love for him was sudden, swift and deep, but more importantly unconditional. Unconditional love does not ask, does not beg, does not writhe with passion, does not kill, does not make one jealous, but shares the joy with like-minded souls of a deep connection that serves a purpose and as Michael says so eloquently "only asks to be lived".
It is the deepest, purest, giving, forever-love there is, and that's how I feel.

I'm leaving the death topic alone, as both you and CaptainEOLove said... too grim. But to this above I want to say this is exactly how I've always felt for Michael, omg, yes. That deep and truly unconditional love that goes beyond any of the little things or daily moods or whatnot. It's very real, forever, amazing, spiritual and astounding. James Van Praagh writes that the main reason for coming here is to learn about love. There are many ways to experience love, I mean from different angles, through different sources (friends, lovers, spouses, family, kids, agape)... and Michael is a BIG way. To love this person with all your soul even though you never knew him personally. I mean, the only ones who understand are those who feel it. And someone else thinking it's based on falsehoods or craziness doesn't make it any less real. It's 1000% real. We're learning about love on this special level, that this deep and unconditional love can exist beyond convention. And this extends outward to the fan-mily, to the world, and back through this as a connection to God. And what really blows my mind is that people have suddenly been hit by this wave of it, like you have, just pooooof. I suppose it shouldn't be that mindblowing. I was hit by it in 1984. You can get it at any point! But then I've had all these years to try to understand it, feel it, let it sink deeper and deeper, stand back and examine it in adulthood, consider it, glow in it. All the things that happen in longterm relationships But all of you who just caught the wave... I know what you're feeling too. It's what I felt in '84, in '90, in '95 in... in.... all the way through to today. As we've written lately, it's also about something like love contracts, like vows, like plans. My God, I always felt that way about Michael! I felt that way 20 years ago, like we all came here together to do something special and important. It was inexplicable and sounded crazy, but I always felt it. Over the years, though, at times I felt like the chance was slipping away, since I was getting older and no amazing thing had happened to change the world and watching the media rip Michael apart and then the trial and all that sh*t. Imagine if someone had said we had to wait until Michael died to fulfill the task :no: I guess there are reasons for not remembering the whole plan. But I absolutely feel that way... that he is an integral part of my life and my soul's plan. It all comes back full circle. There's a reason I've loved him all these years. I KNOW this. I just hope I do a good job fulfilling the promises I made :angel: Whatever happens in life, I know with absolute certainty that I will always love Michael. Always. No question. No doubt. :heart:

 

[MJJLaugh]

Still no MJ dreams for me It feels like he's quite ... distant, busy, something. I guess that makes sense, considering. How are you all holding up? I've cried some times the past few days, but I'm not sinking into that deep, deep sadness when I do. Seem to recover quickly. It's kind of surprising. But then in a couple of days we're coming up to the day I had this dream no and that's probably going to mess me up

I don't feel Michael near either, busy elsewhere or preparing for something ?
I read that dream you had on June 20th, 2009 and I read a couple of pages on in that thread. It seems like a pre-cognitive dream almost, and a lot of people had similar experiences. Subconsciously we knew already...
After June 25th I had a couple of months where I practically only dreamt of Michael every night. Not that we interacted, but he was just always there.

Speaking of dreams, though, had one this morning :lol: Someone (don't know who) explained to me that ... hmm, how do I say it without being too graphic?... that our spirit always seeks the spark of life, the light of creation. And that spark is contained within the physical start of life... the sperm and eggs, like little divine photons of life, like microcosms of heaven itself, which is what creates a new life. And so that's why we all want... you know what you want. It's not just a physical drive to procreate. Take that out of the equation and it's about wanting the light. So it's not about the donut, but really it's the filling that we're after :hysterical: And in the dream this was like some kind of amazing information to get. When I woke up I was like, ok, there might be some mystical truth to that, but really... ummm, there's a very physical drive headed up by hormones and it sounds like an excuse to watch TWYMMF live in Warsaw and pretend it's not the shiny pants that are captivating me :blush: :lol:

LOL about wanting the light in more ways than one, but I must say it makes sense.

But to this above I want to say this is exactly how I've always felt for Michael, omg, yes. That deep and truly unconditional love that goes beyond any of the little things or daily moods or whatnot. It's very real, forever, amazing, spiritual and astounding. James Van Praagh writes that the main reason for coming here is to learn about love. There are many ways to experience love, I mean from different angles, through different sources (friends, lovers, spouses, family, kids, agape)... and Michael is a BIG way. To love this person with all your soul even though you never knew him personally. I mean, the only ones who understand are those who feel it. And someone else thinking it's based on falsehoods or craziness doesn't make it any less real. It's 1000% real. We're learning about love on this special level, that this deep and unconditional love can exist beyond convention. And this extends outward to the fan-mily, to the world, and back through this as a connection to God. And what really blows my mind is that people have suddenly been hit by this wave of it, like you have, just pooooof. I suppose it shouldn't be that mindblowing. I was hit by it in 1984. You can get it at any point! But then I've had all these years to try to understand it, feel it, let it sink deeper and deeper, stand back and examine it in adulthood, consider it, glow in it. All the things that happen in longterm relationships But all of you who just caught the wave... I know what you're feeling too. It's what I felt in '84, in '90, in '95 in... in.... all the way through to today. As we've written lately, it's also about something like love contracts, like vows, like plans. My God, I always felt that way about Michael! I felt that way 20 years ago, like we all came here together to do something special and important. It was inexplicable and sounded crazy, but I always felt it. Over the years, though, at times I felt like the chance was slipping away, since I was getting older and no amazing thing had happened to change the world and watching the media rip Michael apart and then the trial and all that sh*t. Imagine if someone had said we had to wait until Michael died to fulfill the task :no: I guess there are reasons for not remembering the whole plan. But I absolutely feel that way... that he is an integral part of my life and my soul's plan. It all comes back full circle. There's a reason I've loved him all these years. I KNOW this. I just hope I do a good job fulfilling the promises I made :angel: Whatever happens in life, I know with absolute certainty that I will always love Michael. Always. No question. No doubt. :heart:

:wub: Beautifully put! WOW! I am giving you reps for this one! :hug:
EDIT: Oops, gotta spread some more reps to other peeps first....

 

[darlingdear]

:waving: HH.

Mundy - I hope you're move goes well! Shame about the date

Yeah, Michael feels distant to me aswell. Maybe he's conserving his energy for 25th June, when he knows his children, family and fans really will need to feel him around them?

I'm feeling average today, when I stop to think about Michael and next Friday I get all sad..so I'm trying not to think about that really.

I would just like to pick up on what you guys were saying about new and old fans. I felt like I should share when I became a fan and stuff. Your comments about new fans have reassured me so much. I guess I re-discovered Michael in March '09, after the o2 announcements. For my 18th birthday that March, my parents bought me Michael stuff. I loved it so much.
As I've mentioned before, when I was a kid, my sister had the Dangerous album, which she played non-stop, and I loved it. Thinking it was cool to own a monkey and how I wanted a pet monkey too :lol:
But I guess I fell off the MJ path growing up I feel so bad about that. But I wanna make clear I never judged him at all. He was always in the background of my childhood. So March was when I was really like omg, I'm going to see Michael in concert, that to me would of cemented me becoming an 'obsessed' fan. I would re-watch his videos in between classes and exams lol & listen to his music in the car and stuff. I was even going to write Michael a thank you letter after I'd been to the concert, just thanking him so much for giving me this experience and telling him how much I love him
I don't think I am a bandwagon fan, simply because I know in my heart what I felt June 25th. It wasn't fake, I wasn't swept along with it all. My heart really did ache so much, I was in tears for days on end I mean I am still so sad about it. I miss Michael so much.
I feel like those 'bandwagon fans' have gone and what's left are new fans who are devoted to Michael completely? I was at my graduation ball that horrible day, but when I came home, seeing Michael's name on the TV screen I thought who actually is the man himself? Cos I'd been watching his videos and listening to his music since March. I knew a few things about Michael, but really, I wanted to discover who Michael was, behind the music, on a far deeper level, you know?
I ask Michael to forgive me for not being 'active' during the trial (Just wanna make clear, I never ever ever ever thought Michael was guilty in any way)
Like yesterday I watched a video from the trial, and it actually made me question myself as a fan, like am I less of a fan because I wasn't there?

MJJLaugh, what you wrote about unconditional love is so true, that's how I feel too.

I hope Michael knows how much I love him. I really, really do cos I love him so, so much and I always will. I just had to share this with you all cos it always is in the back of my mind, I hope you don't mind everyone.

:heart: to you all

 

[PaceMioDolceCuore]

Sucking $hony!! I just have to vent. I spent a whole day putting a video together to cheer myself up (I laughed myself silly for hours) and was hoping to share it with you guys but nooooooooo, blocked in ALL countries...double whammie. Sony content both on song and pictures. Jesus, ever heard about fair use?? Gosh. :smilerolleyes::angry::angry::mat::mat::mat:

 

[xo_lola_xo]

About the death thing, I'll be gone by mid 50s. It sounds like suicide but don't worry it won't ever be! I just have that feeling. I'd be lucky to make it past late 40s.

 

[mjbunny]

I feel like those 'bandwagon fans' have gone and what's left are new fans who are devoted to Michael completely?

You may have a point there, yes.

I ask Michael to forgive me for not being 'active' during the trial (Just wanna make clear, I never ever ever ever thought Michael was guilty in any way) ...Like yesterday I watched a video from the trial, and it actually made me question myself as a fan, like am I less of a fan because I wasn't there?

Oh hon, :hug: It's alright, really. You weren't there and he was still found innocent. But I know how you feel. You're not less of a fan. No, no. Don't think that. :hug: Everyone is in their own space at their own time, doing what seems right at the time. Michael knows who we are inside now, too.

Sucking $hony!! I just have to vent. I spent a whole day putting a video together to cheer myself up (I laughed myself silly for hours) and was hoping to share it with you guys but nooooooooo, blocked in ALL countries...double whammie. Sony content both on song and pictures. Jesus, ever heard about fair use?? Gosh. :smilerolleyes::angry::angry::mat::mat::mat:

Ohhhh, sucking Fony! "You killed ModAlert's video! You b*stards!" Believe me... I understand! :banghead: And no, Fony has never heard of free use.

 

[darlingdear]

Thanks mjbunny :huggy: That made me feel better. I just guess sometimes that feeling creeps up on me and I just berate myself, guilt trip myself etc.

What you asked not to quote: :huggy: Big hugs, brought a tear to my eye.
I'm sure Michael understands, and like you say..he knows who we are inside now. He can see us, our inner selves, he knows us better than we know ourselves now I guess?
I guess what matters now is that we help each other, all of us, all the fans and move forwards with Michael, helping to change & heal the world, and ensure his legacy lives forever :angel:

I really love Michael. And I love you all in this thread, I really do. I don't know how I would of managed this past year without all you lovely ladies in this thread. You are all wonderful people :heart:
And of course, having Michael experiences, or just reading about them is some added comfort

Mod Alert - Gr @ Sony!

 

[PaceMioDolceCuore]

...Oh hon, :hug: It's alright, really. You weren't there and he was still found innocent. But I know how you feel. You're not less of a fan. No, no. Don't think that. :hug: Everyone is in their own space at their own time, doing what seems right at the time. Michael knows who we are inside now, too.

Please don't beat yourselves up over his trial. (I'm one to talk because just looking at the trial coverage kills me on the inside- but for him)
This trial happened whether we were there or not.
I remember sitting at the table one morning (I had JUST moved to the US and gotten married the first time...was a horror show of epic proportions) and looking at the photo on the car roof. I was so busy just surviving my own hellish nightmare, there was nothing left in thought for him, I was literally surviving.

If we have learned something from the torture that he was put through, than that's a good thing, so maybe someone else doesn't have to suffer what he suffered.

It still kills me to look at the footage but I try to reason with myself, I showed him my support in 93 and I never judged him- and even if some of people might have- that is exactly what the media was trying to accomplish. It poisoned his life. Better learn from that, how media can manipulate us.

Don't think that Michael would want you to feel guilt, he knows how much love is here and just how loved he is. He of all people (remember how he said he locked himself in the bathroom after his first Christmas crying over his feelings of guilt as a former Witness, having left the religion?) wouldn't want you to feel guilt.

Dimond, Bashir, Sneddon and those that were trying to extort him- THEY should take all the guilt there is because it's there's to take. They made his life hell on earth, they can suffer the guilt.

Please don't take on other's people's guilty conscious- because it's on their "karmic bill". I say this as someone who counseled abuse victims. DO NOT RELEASE THOSE RESPONSIBLE OF CRIMES FROM THEIR RESPONSIBILTY BY TAKING ON THEIR GUILT. It's theirs to take, do not poison yourself with someone else's crime. We feel a huge amount of compassion for Michael- but I won't be placing myself on the guilt stand- that one's reserved for those who did him wrong and those that abandoned him- remember Mesereau's words- they tried calling up people to get them as witnesses and people just caved in and kept mum? Jerks. All these people who LOVED to be photographed with him because it helped their carreers to catch some rays from Michael- they are the ones who should feel the guilt.

Don't let the guilty ones eat away at your innocence, your pureness, your energy. They are like energy vampires, sucking it from you because they have none. Don't let them. Kick the guilt right back to where it belongs.

Ohhhh, sucking Fony! "You killed ModAlert's video! You b*stards!" Believe me... I understand! :banghead:

I tried DailyMotion, same thing. Yeah, what an easy way to keep things offline. Effective tool to silence. Good lesson in corporate power.

 

[mjbunny]

^ I totally understand what you're saying. And your life sounds kind of like mine at the time... so much scheisse going on that there was hardly anything left for MJ. I know he'd understand that, too. And as Michael has told me... 'stop feeling guilty about this! Everything is alright.' Oh, I'm trying, dear Michael. I'm getting a lot better at it, I guess. But I'm with you ModAlert on the trial coverage just tearing you up. ME TOO. :no:

darlingdear - just say no to guilt trips

P.S. I think a lot of the guilt-tripping as well comes from the fear-pressure of peer-pressure. People are so quick to judge everyone that we put their judgements onto ourselves. If you weren't there enough or weren't enough of a fan, or God forbid, if you ever doubted him for a fraction of a second of a skipped heartbeat, you're going to fan hell for eternity. Imagine being a fan who'd drifted away and doubted his innocence in '93 or 2005! And there are fans like this, there have to be. Imagine where you'd be today. No one will voice that. No one will admit to that because they'll be attacked and labeled. I think there may be lots of people harboring secret "shame", often over things that there's really no reason for. And that's really too bad. I wish I could just hug everyone who loves Michael and tell them he KNOWS. He knows your heart. Stop beating yourself up. When we do that to ourselves we're not changing one thing. The only thing we're doing is to make ourselves feel less worthy. And it doesn't heal anything. It doesn't fix anything. Only love does :heart:

 

[darlingdear]

^ I will do. It's so draining lol.


I hope to see Michael in my dreams soon. But I understand that he is doing his thang up there.
But I would just like to see him cos it's been a while.

I think it's cool, just reading back, that some of you know who your spirit guides are, like what they look like. I have no clue at all, I ask my spirit guides if I can get a name, or at least see them, that I'm not scared :lol: I guess they are waiting for me to be ready or something. I know someone's got to be there.

 

[mjbunny]

^ He's doing his thang right now, I guess, yes :lol:

 

[darlingdear]

^ Just read your edit.
So true what you say. You have such an eloquent way of explaining things.

Just to throw in a mean girls quote here :lol:.. again
"I wish we could just make a cake filled with rainbows and butterflies, and then we could all eat it and be happy"
:heart:

 

[PaceMioDolceCuore]

^ I totally understand what you're saying. And your life sounds kind of like mine at the time... so much scheisse going on that there was hardly anything left for MJ. I know he'd understand that, too. And as Michael has told me... 'stop feeling guilty about this! Everything is alright.' Oh, I'm trying, dear Michael. I'm getting a lot better at it, I guess. But I'm with you ModAlert on the trial coverage just tearing you up. ME TOO. :no: Not only does it dredge up the hell of the time and all that Michael was going through, but all my personal perceived failings as well.

darlingdear - just say no to guilt trips

P.S. I think a lot of the guilt-tripping as well comes from the fear-pressure of peer-pressure. People are so quick to judge everyone that we put their judgements onto ourselves. If you weren't there enough or weren't enough of a fan, or God forbid, if you ever doubted him for a fraction of a second of a skipped heartbeat, you're going to fan hell for eternity. Imagine being a fan who'd drifted away and doubted his innocence in '93 or 2005! And there are fans like this. Imagine where you'd be today. No one will voice that. No one will admit to that because they'll be attacked and labeled. I think there may be lots of people harboring secret "shame". And that's really too bad. I wish I could just hug everyone who loves Michael and tell them he KNOWS. He knows your heart. Stop beating yourself up. When we do that to ourselves we're not changing one thing. The only thing we're doing is to make ourselves feel less worthy. And it doesn't heal anything. It doesn't fix anything. Only love does :heart:

Yup. It's simple, if you know better, than you do better. And I would not guilt anyone who didn't know the whole back story in 93 or 2005. The media did EVERYTHING in it's reach to make sure that people believed the story. I didn't even have a broadband internet access in 2005- dial up with a modem, I worked close to 70 hours a week etc and was married to an absolute jerk.

And yes, I briefly got annoyed with him for standing on the car, I had changed my opinion about it- but I didn't even have a TV in that time- so I didn't even know what happened. All I saw was him standing on the roof of a car- in front of a court building. Yes, I was annoyed with him because a)I didn't know the backstory from just one single picture in the New York Times (which made me think big time- because that it is not your traditional tabloid...) and b)it was cringeworthy back then knowing how media would just take ANYTHING and blow it out of proportion. Nobody reported this as a gesture of appreciation and love.

And I'll be honest, the whole Berlin story with Blanket was cringeworthy for a moment- but here's the thing. We all have cringeworthy moments because we're freakin' human in this incarnation, only ours don't get played out in world wide media coverage. We have the lucky advantage that nobody is filming us non-stop. You don't wanna know what things I HAVE done in hotels already in my life. But nobody knows about it...in Michael's case they hounded him with literally every move he ever made. That's the difference. And he wasn't a Saint either. But he got vilified, demonized and scrutinized until the issue had nothing to do with actual situation.

I just like to think, Michael, knows baby, Michael knows. :cheeky: He knows of our love and he knows who at least tried to understand him as a person because many people didn't even bother to try. He knows who tried and he knows who does.

I think this is what is bothering me about this vilification of every associate he ever had- by fans. Sometimes I just want to scream, so, you never did anyone wrong? You never wronged anybody in your whole fu**ing life so that you had to ask for their forgiveness? Never? Really? Wow, you're a Saint.
And so it goes. To me it actually speaks of humility and seeing a persons true character if you still can see the goodness in them. Maybe that's why he hired Branca and DiLeo back, simply because they knew their sh*t? Sorry, I don't curse all the time, but this nonstop demonizing gets on my nerves sometimes.
I don't know the backstory, never spoke to these people yet a few blog owners are trying to convince everyon that literally EVERYBODY was an absolute devil in Michael's life.

The nonstop hate for anybody from LMP, Branca, to absolutely anybody. There was a lot that went wrong but gee, it's really easy to judge someone without ever having met them. Sometimes it's easy to slide into the cursing and I try to limit my judgement on things that I have seen people say on tape, repeatedly.

 

[mjbunny]

I just like to think, Michael, knows baby, Michael knows. :cheeky: He knows of our love and he knows who at least tried to understand him as a person because many people didn't even bother to try. He knows who tried and he knows who does.

I wrote that quote earlier myself and deleted it, lolol. Totally get where you're coming from. I went through a period from like Invincible up to the trial in which... I don't know how to explain it. I certainly loved him as much as ever (that's never been an issue whatsoever), but I guess I'd say I was looking at things with... more cynical adult eyes? I was more critical of him than I'd been before, sort of assessing the relationship while going through a lot of the same things on myself. So since last June I've managed to find all sorts of stupid ways to torture myself over every tiny little thing I may have ever said that I don't even remember specifically saying :rolleyes2: That's why I recently dragged out email archives from that time period. Husbunny and I wrote each other 20 times a day, often about Michael. I've had this perception that I was too critical of Michael during that time, but actually reading what I wrote has helped. I'm like, ah, so we didn't know this or that yet at that point. Hmmm. Oh, ouch, sorry Mike, that was harsh! h34r: Oh, but now look, Michael... see how sweetly I wrote about you here and how I defended you? How I explained my feelings back then in those emails kind of made me think, ok... what's my problem? It's all ok. :rolleyes2: So in retrospect, things might not look as bad as you remember them. And in any case... you can't change it now anyway. It's all on record, booohahahahaaa :doh: :lol: And so be it. Like you said, no one's perfect. Michael neither. Just thought of another way to think about it... would we want MJ to be guilt-tripping himself right now and feeling like ish over some perceived disappointment, like he wasn't good enough at some point for us, or thinking he could've done something better for us? Of course not! Why? Because we love him. Same thing in reverse :heart:MJ:heart:

 

[mjbunny]

I think this is what is bothering me about this vilification of every associate he ever had- by fans. Sometimes I just want to scream, so, you never did anyone wrong? You never wronged anybody in your whole fu**ing life so that you had to ask for their forgiveness? Never? Really? Wow, you're a Saint.
And so it goes. To me it actually speaks of humility and seeing a persons true character if you still can see the goodness in them. Maybe that's why he hired Branca and DiLeo back, simply because they knew their sh*t? Sorry, I don't curse all the time, but this nonstop demonizing gets on my nerves sometimes.
I don't know the backstory, never spoke to these people yet a few blog owners are trying to convince everyon that literally EVERYBODY was an absolute devil in Michael's life.

The nonstop hate for anybody from LMP, Branca, to absolutely anybody. There was a lot that went wrong but gee, it's really easy to judge someone without ever having met them. Sometimes it's easy to slide into the cursing and I try to limit my judgement on things that I have seen people say on tape, repeatedly.

:clapping: (Doh, hadn't read this part, lol). Yeah, seriously, this is SO MUCH how I feel. My God, to think that something I screwed up 15 years ago would be held against me forever! :doh: And people can change, good grief! Granted, not everyone does, but this permanent lack of forgiveness drives me crazy too :angry: The part about humility... like when MJ said to Shmuckley that he believes he could've gotten through even to Hitler. Talk about seeing the good in people! And you know what? I totally get that. Right on, Michael

P.S. You could upload your vid just for us via mediafire or megaupload

 

[PaceMioDolceCuore]

:clapping: (Doh, hadn't read this part, lol). Yeah, seriously, this is SO MUCH how I feel. My God, to think that something I screwed up 15 years ago would be held against me forever! :doh: And people can change, good grief! Granted, not everyone does, but this permanent lack of forgiveness drives me crazy too :angry: The part about humility... like when MJ said to Shmuckley that he believes he could've gotten through even to Hitler. Talk about seeing the good in people! And you know what? I totally get that. Right on, Michael

P.S. You could upload your vid just for us via mediafire or megaupload

yeah...I just didn't feel like forcing people to download a joke basically. I heard a particular song and the movie theatre inside my head started to roll...I laughed all night long just looking at the clips in connection with the lyrics...
lemme know if it worked.
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=V85504NG

 

[amygrace]

Hey girls! Do'h...I'm only like 2 pages behind but it's full of long posts that my mind can't handle right now. lol. I was up late last night working on a song, didn't get to bed till 5am :doh:...and then tried dedicating most of today to finishing the song but DAMN that thing is killin' me! I don't know what the heck is up with that but anyway I'm BURNT OUT. Just wanted to drop in for some huggins :group: Will try to get fully updated later. Holla!

 

[CaptainEoLove85]

DarlingDear, I'm with you there on the guilt. I still feel it occasionally, but it's way better than it was. Back in June/July/August when the pain was fresh, I literally spent many nights just apologizing and confessing to Michael about all my guilty feelings. It really helped to verbally just get it all out there, but then I worried I was unloading too much on him. :doh: He was probably thinking "Whoa, relax girl!" :lol: But I know he understands, and I know he loves everyone who loves him no matter how or when. :yes:

I think once this date comes back, it will be very hard yes, but I hope it will also be a day of reflection. I have to face it. I won't be able to ignore it.

 

[8701girl]

Everyone has different ways with "confession". Some go to the priest and some pray to god b4 they go to bed. Everyone has different ways dealthing with gulit.

 

[xo_lola_xo]

"You and I were never separate
It's just an illusion
Wrought by the magical lens of perception

There is only one wholeness
Only one mind
We are like ripples
In the vast ocean of consciousness" - Michael (Heaven Is Here)

 

[mjbunny]

^ And that continues to be the message, because it's apparently true :heart:

CaptainEoLove - I think a lot of people are in that same position, and you're right... Michael's probably like, "Relax, girl!" :lol: :hug:

Hi Harmony Hut :heart: - I'll be offline for a while, but just quickly wanted to mention a dream from this morning. Still no MJ dreams, but there were some mentions of him. I was in a house, just a regular suburban US home, and someone said something about lining up for an MJ concert, so we moved toward the sliding glass doors. While standing there, someone mentioned Elizabeth Taylor and then my sister's demeanor changed as if she was trance channeling and she turned around and began walking through the house. This is when I 'remembered' that Elizabeth Taylor had supposedly lived or stayed in this house at some point in her life. My sister was walking slowly, like not used to her current body. I followed her down the hallway. She was saying things like, "OhHHHhh, I used to live here". She walked into a bedroom that had a picture of Elizabeth (looked like the tapestry MJ gave her in Private Home Movies, but smaller) on the wall over a dresser and she said, "That's meeEEeee!" And I said to her, "How is it that you're here right now?" ... She replied, "Because I'm close. ..... Very soon." I knew this meant that she was close to dying and was in a stage where she was wandering in and out of her body a lot. I had a lot of other weird dreams after that, but later when I woke up for the day I had "Elizabeth, I Love You" running through my head. :mello: