to the members of mjjc

[Michelle MC]

Aww Michelle *hugs*

I understand the newer members are feeling guilty for not joining earlier, I think if I had joined after June I'd feel guilty too! But what the problem is, they shouldn't need to feel so! At least not for the reason that older members make them feel belittled or something!
I try my best to treat everyone the same no matter what the join date is because I know there is many fans, probably even most of the fans who joined after June, who have been fan for many years and just didn't join any forum earlier. In total honestly the join date doesn't matter. It shows those who stood up for Michael during the trial and kept this forum going, but after that it doesn't mean anything.

I feel so bad that some new members feel alienated, it shouldn't be so I'm doing my best to make everyone feel welcome and TOGETHER we CAN do it. We can make MJJC a better place!

May I steal this idea from another thread we had here a while ago, don't remember who posted this there...

Heal the MJJC
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire fan community
There are people hurting
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for
You and for me.

Thank you for your kind post. As I said, I FEEl like the guilt is being pushed back at me. Emotions are wrong a lot of times and I know that nobody means to make us newbies feel unwelcomed or belittled or to throw guilt back in our faces. I know that. It just FEELS like it because I can't get over my guilt and when the subject of join dates come up, my guilt comes right smack in my face again. Believe me, I wish all I had to be guilty of is not joining a Michael forum before he passed. It's the doubting of his innocence when I heard he was charged again that is really getting to me, even though I leaned toward believing he was innocent, the fact I doubted sometimes really bothers me.
Most of the new people don't have that problem. They just have the guilt of not being here before Michael passed. I envy them for that being the only thing. I feel alienated because of my guilt. I haven't seen anyone that I talked to by pm have this guilt I have. So I feel alienated because of that alone. Join dates don't have to come up in order for me to feel alienated. My guilt alone alienates me.

 

[Courtney]

I just wanted to say...it's too bad that some consider themselves "old" fans, while others are "new". If there is one very significant thing that Mr. Jackson did in his lifetime, it was his ability to bring several generations together in love and friendship. It is all about the L.O.V.E. here. I for one am very happy to see both old and "new" fans showing just how spectacular Mr. Jackson truly was!

Aww. I really love your post. You are absolutely right and Michael would love both the "old" and "new" fans just the same. He's the reason we are all here. We all have one special thing in common and it is our love for Michael. :hug:

 

[MJJ7777]

Nvm...

 

[Mariajoaosilva]

I'd like to throw in my couple of cents!

No forum or fanclub or any community can survive without new members. I want each and every new member to know that this is their home now and that all new members are loved and will be supported no matter what. One day soon, the newbies will be old members and supporting the new members as well.

It's the circle of life.

I think what happened is that there were a few overzealous new members that started to dictate the flow of discussion - to the point that older members didn't want to participate anymore. Can you imagine if you were here through the trial of 2003-2005 and actually sat in court, or was allowed press passes, or studied the case extensively and then a new member comes around now and demands that you show proof of what you speak of? And then when you show proof you are told that "I don't believe that to be the case..." Or "Give me a link to that... Prove what you say ... Don't accuse this person or that person... You don't know what happened to Michael... Don't accuse AEG" The list goes on and on. Some of the newbies didn't understand that it was okay for members to go through the motion and point fingers because it was a way of healing. But many folks got shut down because of it.

I've seen that happen time and time again on here and the a lot older members started feeling disrespected and hurt and they left this place.

I think some respect was lost for MJJC and the membership after Michael's death. The rules were not followed and some of the newer members caused a lot of disruption. Many were banned! It could have just been because of anger/frustration... some could have just been trouble makers. Nevertheless, many felt pushed out of their home.

So here we are. All of us are lost and feeling sad and depressed. What do we do?

1st thing? Respect the forum. If you love it here, respect the rules of discussion. If you do not like it here, leave. It is that simple. Respect each others opinion. If you don't agree with it, challenge it but don't brow beat another member into submission.

We have to act like family!! Even if we have a crazy uncle or silly aunt we still love them, right? :lol: We need to accept ALL! Accept one another and we gotta stop fighting. We may not agree with one another but we do agree that we love Michael and we love this place. Before we lose this, LOVE it and respect it.

Tis all...

just a question for everyone

When you visit you new boyfriends /girlfriends family for the first time do you trash their home, talk bad about them, and generally disrupt their family life???

well this is Garys house, the mods are his family members and you are just a guest. Treat them with respect and obey their rules and you will be welcome and allowed to stay, otherwise you will be removed....simples

Just want to give a hudge :clapping::clapping::clapping::clapping::clapping::clapping:to trish,to you moon,and to you victoria83.

 

[ASIS]

umm... I really don't get where all these fights are taking place.. i'd love to read them :S

seriously though other than the janet incident I didn't see much bickering amongst fans anymore.. anywho even if i am a new member i'm just mostly playing games or visiting the random thoughts section. This place is pretty neat but I hope we are not taking your home from you... I know how sucky that feels

 

[edge003]

umm... I really don't get where all these fights are taking place.. i'd love to read them :S

seriously though other than the janet incident I didn't see much bickering amongst fans anymore.. anywho even if i am a new member i'm just mostly playing games or visiting the random thoughts section. This place is pretty neat but I hope we are not taking your home from you... I know how sucky that feels

I'm with ASIS i havn't seen that much bickering and i usually hang around the random thoughts section. I'm a newbie to the forum and i can't think of any time that an "older" member has made me unwelcome or judged me on my join date or my age for that matter. I think people worry that people judge them on their join date too much i don't think people pay too much attention, but maybe i'm wrong i don't know.

 

[janena]

I can only speak for myself here but i have seen some really GREAT people that joined after Michael passed away.
We must realise they can be longtime fans that just never felt the need to talk until he was taken away from us.


That being said...i did notice a (small!) number of new members that are disrespectful towards the people on our forum.
I am afraid that this relative small group of people chased away some longtime members by their behaviour.
I think its really disrespectful to behave like they do or did....
I have been a longtime member since 2003 and at times i feel annoyed but thats mostly because i have difficulties coping with Michaels passing.

I think the board will be fine sometime in the near future but since we are all hurting still its hard to have peace here.
A lot has happened and everything is really different now.....
Our minds are not at peace and its reflecting on the forum which i think it not suprising at all...

 

[mjgem]

Most people dont know about this site also, there are still millions of fans out there that dont use this site. I feel lucky that i found this forum and that i officially became a member in march. I find it irritating when the small amount of newbies be disrespectful, but i think their either not used to talking in a forum as big and strong as this one or are bascially not as big a fan as they make out to be.

 

[D.Electric]

well this is Garys house, the mods are his family members and you are just a guest.

Im sorry, I agree with everything you say apart from this. With the upmost respect from the bottom of my heart, I am not a guest - I am part of this family. And I'd like to think a respected one.

That being said, I would like to give you and everyone who feels this way a gigantic hug. I know that it must seem that through a terrible grief, you were tresspassed upon, and even as a 'newbie' to the forum there have been moments I have been appalled at some members attitudes.

I dont know know what can be dont to change this... but what I do know is THIS (and is aimed at the community, not particular individuals):

Gary has been working very hard return MJJC to the loving community it was before Michael passed... this is EVIDENT. you may not agree with his methods, but at least respect him. Everything he does is for US as a COMMUNITY. show him some respect please.

 

[Loopy]

I would just like to add that i do not think members should be judged by their 'joining' date - they should be judged by what they bring to the forum. I have always been in love with Michael, for as long as i can remember. I only joined this forum after he died as i really needed to be able to talk to other people who felt the same as i did. I can not talk about how i feel anywhere else as everyone just says 'oh aren't you over that yet?' and other comments like that. I can come on here and say how i really feel without embarassment.
I really believe that Michael would hate the fact that people are bickering on a website that is supposed to be for people who love him. Just because someone joined this forum before he died does not mean that they love him anymore than people who joined afterwards. We should all have mutual respect for each other, regardless of when they joined. Respect's not given it's earnt.

 

[sweet princess]

Stop fighting, Starting spreading the L.O.V.E.
That's Michael would want us to do. :yes:

 

[D.Electric]

:ermm:
Hold Me Like The River Jordan, And I Will Then Say To Thee...You Are My Friend :ermm:

 

[TinaG]

I respect all opinions posted in this thread, from the OP on down...very valid points and opinions. I read through every page and so many of my own thoughts and feelings have already been expressed here by others. But I do want to add a few things of my own.

I joined after June 25th, which makes me new to this community, but I don't consider myself a new fan. I felt the need after MJ died to connect with other fans, which is something I did not feel the need to do before MJ's death. Why? Because MJ was here then, so the only connection that mattered to me then was the connection to MJ himself. I'm not saying that I'm his best fan or biggest fan or anything else; I don't feel the need to qualify or quantify my devotion to Michael. Nor do I feel that anyone else should have to do that either...because it's not a competition (and I'm not saying that the OP or anyone else was suggesting otherwise...just offering my opinion).

When I joined here, I felt immediately at home. I knew I could connect with other fans here, which was the only way I knew to continue to connect with MJ too, so it was important for me to find and feel that connection. I've disagreed with some folks on occasion, but I've always done so with respect and with appreciation for other people's viewpoints. And if something ever gets too heated, I just leave that particular thread. After all, I'm not here to win arguments or be right or prove something. I'm here...because I love Michael.

I think that all members, "old" and "new", should post with respect and kindness. It is very possible to disagree with someone without being disrespectful. It is very possible to treat others just as you want to be treated. It is also very possible to put the LOVE for MJ back at the forefront of this community, which is clearly what it was built on in the first place. The evidence of that love is in the "old" members who bring so much history and commitment to this community and to MJ; and it's in the "new" members who bring a new energy and often a new perspective. We are all a necessary part of the legacy of Michael Jackson, and as such, we should be united in the goal of preserving that legacy.

I don't post often (and clearly I ramble when I do post!), but when I do, I always try to do so with love, kindness, and respect for every member of the community. Because if I can't do that, I don't even feel like I deserve to call myself a fan.

Thanks to Gaz, all the mods, and every member here who is here for LOVE!

 

[ShadowMaster]

i re-joined mjjc in july 2009. i used to have another account here that i sort of lost details of. i came here since 2003 and up untill 2007. then a series of bad things happened to me in a cascade .... and i had to stay offline for almost 2 years. i can tell you i missed this board every day. when mike died my world crashed ..literally. at that point of my life, mj was the best support that i got. then......everyhing went to hell. i am a lonely person..by nature and by circumstances. and the fact that i saw fans getting 2gether all over the world made me feel like an alien. i got no fans here in my town to hang out...so it's pretty bad... i needed to come back here as bad as i need air to breathe. i felt i had a family here during the trial, and i really needed that. both because mike died and because of my personal pbs that seem to go on forever..
i need you guys so much i could hug each one of you. the reason i made a new account is that i forgot everything about the old one. i only remeber my id but i don't have a clue of the password or the email i used then to sign up ...it's been 6 yrs ... so i made this one.
i am a fan of michael since 92. i was 10 back then ..i'm 27 now...it's been a long and rough road for me but thanks to michael i feel i am a stronger, better person. i love him endlessly. so much that ppl around me think i'm nuts. you guys are the ppl i get along best. i love you all

 

[Tin Angel]

Just as TinaG, I joined MJJC after June 25th looking for comfort. People here are so kind and friendly. I'm so so so glad to be able to talk to such beautiful people as all of you are. So I'm from Spain and around 2003 I joined some Spanish forums and I met wonderful people there and even became very close friend with some of them. This summer I had the need to talk to fans around the WHOLE country and I felt the need to help them. I have a very good friend who lives in Italy and it hurts so much not being able to be with her 'cause she's suffering very much, as we do 'cause all of us are missing Michael.
I just wanted to say thanks to all of the people who are making possible that this family continues growing: Gaz, the mods and ALL THE FANS, the old ones and the new ones. I'm so proud of being part of this forum, all of you are wonderful and beautiful people, you really have to know that. About an hour ago I watched the Childhood video and I cried so much 'cause that video always made me miss Michael and my "cure" was coming back here, to read posts, comment, lurk at the "macro thread"... all of those things make me feel happy and make me feel close to Michael and his fans. And I can feel that way because of ALL OF YOU and EVERYONE in this forum should be proud of him/herself because you're making a lot of people happy and just for your words of love.
Love... It's all about that! LOVE!
We should try and learn from Michael everyday of our life to respect others. Thank you eveyone of you for letting me be part of this beautiful family.
I love you all. :heart:

 

[Autumn II]

If it's any consolation, to those of you who seem worried about it? Personally, I don't usually even LOOK at the join-date, of anyone. There are situations where a person may have been a member, and then life intervened. Or, a person may be a life-long fan, but just not involved with message boards. But then after Michael's passing, they wanted to find community? Or, the person might have had a screen-name change, for whatever reason (it happens. . ). And so on. I look at the content of posts, and if someone seems to be a nice person. I'm sure I'm not the only "older" member who feels like that. "Join-date" just doesn't matter much, or at all, to me.

Carry on,

Vic

 

[Muchos]

Nice too see you moonstreet and I can totally relate to what your saying. It is a difficult, and frustrating time, and I too like most of the old members have slowed down on the activity here, not consciously but because like you said the atmosphere here is not the same. The brother/sisterhood on MJJC pre 25th was exclusivly here on this board. We can achieve that once again I hope, but it will take time for the new members to adjust I feel.

Anyways I don't know what else to say now but it's nice to see you post back here and I hope to see you more often.

Does anyone know where Arxter is, I really miss his contributions and amusing post here.

Peace and love

 

[XxWelshFanxX]

Some people are being, well not hateful that's too strong of a word, but more like they don't like us newbies, anything we have to say is not accounted, we're like brushed aside, I feel as if because I'm a newbie here ( I joined in June) people think that I don't know Michael as much as the long term members here. I'm 18 this month and I've been a fan of Michael for 14 years, that's half of my life I've dedicated to him.
I do feel as if the newbies are all being blamed, sure ok maybe some of them do cause trouble and as everyone says the atmosphere here changed once all the newbies came after June but I'm a newbie and I've never argued, I've never caused trouble I've never offended anyone, and I've always shown respect to Gary to the mods and to every member here, but with the newbie label I feel I'm being prosecuted
I feel that if people learn that I'm a newbie they'll stay away 'cause we're known was the trouble makers.
I just feel really small next the the long term members of this forum.

 

[man_in_the_mirror]

i have to agree hunny ... its a shame

 

[Anth0ny]

I was a fan LONG before he died. However, it was his death that prompted me to find the biggest community of fans... and I found myself here.

 

[sugarbunny891]

We really need to change the record with this whole new/old member thing now. It is getting boring reading continuous threads about this. Join dates are irrelevant and will be this time next year when we will see truly who sticks around. Join dates to mjjc arent the be all and end all of mj fanship. Before forums and internet who was subscribed to off the wall magazine to find MJ penpals, and using pen to paper to contact other fans? Exactllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

p.s I can also be understanding to the post June members as my Mum is the BIGGEST ROD STEWART fan I have ever known she absolutly loves him - she does not have to sign up to a internet forum to prove it either.

 

[D.Electric]

p.s I can also be understanding to the post June members as my Mum is the BIGGEST ROD STEWART fan I have ever known she absolutly loves him - she does not have to sign up to a internet forum to prove it either.

THANKYOU!!!! :clapping::*****:

 

[twinklEE]

this is something other forums have to deal with as well its not just a solely mjjc issue. the community is changing.

 

[D.Electric]

this is something other forums have to deal with as well its not just a solely mjjc issue. the community is changing.

I would expect such judgement and small minded attitudes at michaeljackson.com - considering they are run by sony... but i dont expect it at MJJC where we are supposed to be a loving community run by fans for fans. We should be more considerate towards eachother. This is not how ?Gaz wants his forum operated, along with many members of this community.

I honestly dont mean that as a dig at your comment, its just my view... And Im not in ANY way trying to insinuate that you are someone who judges others here on join dates, I enjoy reading your posts and respect alot of the things you say... I guess my main point is, I tried out the other forums, and I came here because I felt loved and part of a COMMUNITY, not just a internet forum full of argumentative know it alls who thought their opinion was gospel. I know I repeat it again and again, but MJJC is like a family, the majority of the time we respect eachother... and we need to get back to that.

 

[MJ:rocksmyworld]

Thanks for posting this moonstreet as i agree & respect your opinion. I just wanted to put straight my reason for joining after June 25th. I have been a fan of Michaels for several years & before June 25th i was signed up with Michaels official forum so i would always hang out there & talk to fans. However, ever since Michael passed l, like you, found it very strange to go back on the forum, as it was once full of joy, happiness & excitement building up to the concerts that would have been in july. I go on there now & i feel lost, umcomfortable, things arent the same. Theres so many new members now that have just joined that i just find it strange. So i know how you feel when coming on here. So, this is the reason why i signed up to this forum, i did look on this forum a few times before his death but only as a guest.
I now feel more settled on this forum, as this place is friendly & i guess its just a fresh start. I've gotta say, without this forum i dunno what i'd do. This place helps me to cope with the loss of our Michael & coming on here and chatting with you guys makes me feel better, comforted & im pleased people an understand what im going through. So thankyou all.

I do hope your doing okay Moonstreet, or at least better than you were months back Take care.

 

[StarSecret]

In my opinion,

The forum changed because Michael died.
Nothing will ever be the same - even if no one registered after June 25.
It's just easier to lay blame for the disruption on something else (in some cases: new members) because in some ways it avoids the fact that MIchael's passing is why this has happened.

I understand that, it's really upsetting and hurtful. But it's counterproductive. So I agree with everyone who's said that we need to look past join dates.

 

[8701girl]

p.s I can also be understanding to the post June members as my Mum is the BIGGEST ROD STEWART fan I have ever known she absolutly loves him - she does not have to sign up to a internet forum to prove it either.

Good vaild statement! :clapping:

 

[Anna]

In most cases join dates do not reflect how big a fan or how long a fan someone has been. New members join forums all the time, but the ones who joined MJJC after June 25th are being judged. Unfairly.
Before June 25th, MJJC had such a sense of community. And it's not been lost because of new members. If anything it's because some new members are being discriminated against and everyone's emotions are running so high at the moment.
Remember we are all here for the same reason.

 

[sugarbunny891]

Good vaild statement! :clapping:

Well its true she has followed him since he started and queen for that fact i love going thorugh all the original fan club magazines she has from these artists. God some of her queen stuff is from before they hit the big time, when they would somethimes write there own notes to fans and the mags were posted out with hand written envelope!! If she went on a forum now for Queen and her join date was 09, and she got slated for being a newbie! It would make me laugh so much, as she is devoted to the band, and Rod. Remember guys its just Cyber Space, and a forum! )

I am going to scan and post up some pages from Off the Wall magazine soon when I have time and im sure everyone will see how pointless join dates on this forum mean when they see the dedication real fans put in back i nthe early eighties/ninties. You couldnt just go to your living room in ure dressing gown and log on nad have a instant response. You had to write a letter, wait three months to see if it was published and wait for the answers to your questions!!!!!!!! I guess the point i am trying to say is INTERNET FORUMS do not prove anything.

 

[8701girl]

If anything it's because some new members are being discriminated against and everyone's emotions are running so high at the moment.
Remember we are all here for the same reason.

The new members should not be discriminated just cuz they are new members of this community, we should be thankful that they have realised the genuis of who michael was and come to join us all to celebrate him & his life. MJJC we are all family!