staywild23
Premium Member
My original passion for Michael, I was all fine with that. Then when it went into crazy phase, this was quite a while ago, I was a bit embarrassed cos although Michael was really cool (well, I mean, he had died by this stage - I mean, even when he was alive he'd moved past the college preppy look of early to mid-80's).
Where was I?
OK, so there was a time when Michael didn't seem so cool to me, I loved him but he had no edge. And all of my guys always had edge. He just didn't. Or not as much as the others did. So for a brief moment I felt a bit weird. Crazy, huh? I got over it pretty quickly but for a while there it was a thing. I can hardly even understand it now, looking back. It sounds mad. I'm like, 'was that me? Nah!' But it was me. For a little while.
OMG I completely understand this. You have no idea. I'm not sure this is what you mean by edge, but it took me years.... I mean years and years and yeeeeaaaaaarrrrrsss of my life (and therapy lol) to find kindness, gentleness, and softness in men attractive. It is something I always craved, but I was really messed up for a long ass time, and I didn't even know it was possible, let alone attractive.
We talk constantly about how just physically attractive Michael is and obviously how much of a beast he is on stage and how overwhelming and sexy he is as a performer. But all those qualities alone are only part of what make me lose my absolute sanity over him. A massive portion is the purity of him. He is just so...authentic. He is so kind and gentle and soft in a really really good way. The juxtaposition of him, his complexity, the fact that he makes me feel safe, the lack of "edge" (how I'm interpreting that at least) is all part of what makes me attracted to him. I love that he just feels like this really good, pure, kind person, while also being this powerhouse. It's everything.