Merged: Psychics channel Michael

[darlingdear]

I know it's late to say but sorry to hear about your family issues Mrs.Music - but glad things are okay now :huggy:

& Sorry I wasn't there for the meditation
I wonder what happened..maybe there wasn't enough energy around or something. It's funny how scary things came up in them too..I wonder what it's all about. Although agreeing with mjbunny, seems Mrs.Music had a great time

 

[Tinkerbell2]

Ahhhhh.... Noooooo Did I miss a meditation?

 

[Mundy]

^ How strange. The rabbit turning evil reminds me of the MJ look-alike who morphed into something scary. Well, maybe it really wasn't a good time for it. Sounds like Mrs Music actually had the best time, lol

Th rabbit part shocked me because I have always had an affinity for rabbits. My Chinese year is the year of the rabbit and I feel like the rabbit is my power animal.

I did have some good moments. We sang 'All the colours of the world should be loving each other wholeheartedly' and we were dancing.

:lol: I just remembered at one point Michael was doing things from Ghosts and we all said 'Is this scary?' and pulled our faces into weird shapes. We were doing a dance routine for 2bad too.

It wasn't a bad experience for me, very lighthearted and weird at the end!

 

[mjbunny]

Ahhhhh.... Noooooo Did I miss a meditation?

Technically, yes, but it seems you didn't really miss much since we didn't seem to really do anything but have some weird glimpses and flashes

The rabbit part shocked me because I have always had an affinity for rabbits. My Chinese year is the year of the rabbit and I feel like the rabbit is my power animal.

I did have some good moments. We sang 'All the colours of the world should be loving each other wholeheartedly' and we were dancing.

:lol: I just remembered at one point Michael was doing things from Ghosts and we all said 'Is this scary?' and pulled our faces into weird shapes. We were doing a dance routine for 2bad too.

It wasn't a bad experience for me, very lighthearted and weird at the end!

As you might guess from my name, the husbunny and I are rabbit-friendly people as well, lol :bunny: Even the "Is this scary?" part involved "scary images" in some way. Hmmm, wonder why. At least that part was fun for you, though :tease:

 

[Mundy]

Sorry you guys missed it :huggy:

I'm glad you enjoyed yours MrsMusic

For me it felt like Michael's mood was playing a big role in the direction of it. Maybe he felt like we've been taking him too seriously in meditations. The MLP is different but maybe the experimental one should be a bit more fun? He was always a prankster afterall. When I started in the Beat It set, we all drank a shot at a counter. He just seemed to be messing around the whole time. I know things are a lot more serious now but in my meditation he just seemed playful.

Then again some of you were seeing things that disturbed you. I did see a few things at the start that I could have done without seeing but when I was able to concentrate on it properly everything was just fun (until the rabbit part).

I don't know :scratch: I'm gonna type out the whole thing then maybe put a shortened version up.

EDIT: Most of what happened I already posted. I haven't been doing this long so I don't know if anything I experienced is accurate. I wonder why this happened tonight. Did you check that chart you posted before mjbunny? I forgot to bookmark it.

 

[mjbunny]

^ Do you mean the kp index for geomagnetic storms? Yeah, it's totally quiet right now, so it should mean intuition and the ability to pick up info is strong (according to that one study). http://www.swpc.noaa.gov/rt_plots/kp_3d.html

 

[Mundy]

Yes that one, thank you. I bookmarked it this time

I think I might order a few books. Was it you talking about a book a while back called 'The Intention Experiment' (or something like that). That's the scientific one right?

Edit: I found it

 

[CaptainEoLove85]

Hi guys, I see some of you did the meditation. I was gone all day, so I couldn't be part of it. I didn't miss much though I guess. Weird experiences. :mello: Also good to see *Billie Jean* is online again. Sending everyone well wishes. :huggy:

 

[Neeve]

Oh, that sounds incredible and not crazy at all, don't worry Wow, really nice, thank you for sharing :heart: :angel:

Hi Niamh :huggy:. Sweet meditation. I love when Michael is talking about love and you can feel it. He IS love :wub:

Thanks guys! :wub:

No, doesn't sound crazy at all, sounds wonderful. Me thinks he likes what you write, you have a message...

Oh, you're so sweet....yes, it did fit in well with my last blog post!
I'm sorry about the frustration with your music - I hope you'll be doubly inspired when you work on it again :better:

LOVE to all

 

[mjbunny]

^ Are those thoughts really that strange? I think we all have them from time to time. I'm the same way. Whenever something happens I then try to figure out some logical explanation, like coincidence. But then I try to remind myself of things that have happened in life that just were too darned amazing to be mere coincidence. If those things happen, then what does that tell us? That it can be real.

I was going to tell this story the other day (don't think I have in the past) and relates to the "is this real?" theme. I was searching just now for news articles about this, but since it was years ago and I don't remember names I can't find anything just now. Around 1998-2000 I was dreaming one night when all of a sudden the dream shifted and I was suddenly in a car with four other women, all mid-30's to 40's. It felt like we'd been to some event or party and were on our way home late at night. We were going southbound on I-XXX (edited out freeway name) approaching downtown Bxxxxxxx (edited out city name). I knew this road very well as I drove it daily. We saw headlights then coming northbound in the southbound lanes. Some moron was driving the wrong way, on the wrong side of the freeway! The women in the car said, "Omg, they're going to KILL someone!" and the driver flashed her lights and honked the horn frantically as the car passed. Someone said something about calling the police.

Bam... I woke up. It was around 3:05-3:15am. I was like... wtf? :scratch:Later that day while driving to work I heard on the news that "just after 3am" a wrong-way driver going north in the southbound lanes of I-XXX had collided with another vehicle just north of downtown Bxxxxxxx and killed someone. I was like... Is that coincidence? Day, time, simultaneous dream, direction, location. I mean... what the...?? But wait, there's more...

Somehow the wrong-way driver (who was drunk) survived. Almost two years later there was finally a trial. Since it happened in the middle of the night, there weren't many witnesses. Some of the few witnesses called were a group of FOUR WOMEN in their mid-30's to mid-40's who'd been at some event or party late that night. They were in one car on their way home, heading into downtown Bxxxxxxx southbound when they saw the wrong-way car coming toward them in the other lane. Their testimony stated that they exclaimed, "They're going to kill someone!" and that they honked their horn and flashed their headlights to try to get the other's attention to no avail. They then immediately called police, but by then it was too late. :bugeyed ... wait: :bugeyed!

So I was IN THEIR CAR, live, REAL TIME as it happened while I was sleeping. WHY??? None of their names were familiar. The victim and the drunk driver had no connection to me that I could ever ascertain. So why was I there? And more importantly.... I WAS THERE! I'm sharing this because what does that say about consciousness????! Seriously. We leave our bodies while we sleep and check out what's going on in the 'hood? Or was it telepathic? In any case, it should be enough to make one think... holy... ! It's not the only story I have like this, but it's one of the ones I had the most factual corroboration for. And when I think of things like this I have to think... how could I believe that other amazing stories aren't true then? I mean, not all of them have to be true, of course, but consciousness is obviously NOT what science accepts at present.

 

[Mundy]

Asedora I think you shouldn't doubt yourself. I think we just need something to believe in. Whatever that is, nobody knows if it's right or wrong. It is part of who we are, the way we look at life and the choices we make. That's just my opinion of course


Guys I need a break for a while. To be honest, I have put my life on hold for the last 10 months. I spend about 12 hours in front of my computer every day, if not more. All day every day all I think about is Michael. It's unhealthy. I spent a healthy amount of time listening to his music before June. I didn't need a forum because for years I was the only MJ fan I knew and I didn't know what it was like to be around people who felt the same way. I really needed people who get me since June and I relied too heavily on it. I never grieved properly because I let myself into this world where it's always about Michael and he's always here. It actually hasn't hit me yet. I'm afraid of that but I'm just numbing myself spending all this time here.

I'll be back when I can trust myself to log off after a short period of time.

I love you guys. I really, really do :heart: and I'll be participating in MLP regardless.

:heart::group::heart:

btw, I gave neeve my email address and this isn't anything anyone needs to worry about. I just need a bit of a break. Love you guys :heart:

 

[8701girl]

Aww :hug: mundy, i understand how u feel and have felt the same way sometimes.

But i think myabe after mikes first annivarsy i might leave mjjc, im just not sure yet.

 

[mjbunny]

MJbunny , thak you for sharing. This is crazy weird ::bugeyed I believe you becuse mine is freaking crazy too with this actor. I will try to post mine tomorrow.
Strange how you could see those 4 women in that car? Wait a minute was it maybe telepatic? Ok could be in this case. What about dead ppl? Why number of coincidences took a place with me personally AFTER MJ passed. This is a question I ask myslef all the time.

I had something one time like you with that actor. Some people were murdered during a robbery in another state and I spent an entire day in intense contact with one of the men killed... all his thoughts and despair until he moved on hours later. I could smell the place, I could feel the coldness of the floor. He was so panicked and upset for hours and he could explain to me what was going on there, about the police being there and seeing his father, etc. It was crazy weird and I have no idea why i connected with him. But if I helped him, then so be it. :heart: I suppose if mediums connected with Michael soon after he passed that it makes sense they weren't fans. We were devasted, emotional, not in any kind of state to truly help or have a real conversation, you know. But why one spirit connects with another... why that person and not another... that's a mystery to me. :scratch:

Guys I need a break for a while. To be honest, I have put my life on hold for the last 10 months. I spend about 12 hours in front of my computer every day, if not more. All day every day all I think about is Michael. It's unhealthy. I spent a healthy amount of time listening to his music before June. I didn't need a forum because for years I was the only MJ fan I knew and I didn't know what it was like to be around people who felt the same way. I really needed people who get me since June and I relied too heavily on it. I never grieved properly because I let myself into this world where it's always about Michael and he's always here. It actually hasn't hit me yet. I'm afraid of that but I'm just numbing myself spending all this time here.

Oh, wow, ok. :hug: If that's what you feel you need, then we'll understand. :group: I hope you do alright with this process. Whenever you need us, of course you know you can just log back in. And thank you for still doing MLP. We'll miss having you around regularly. :heart: :angel:

Aww :hug: mundy, i understand how u feel and have felt the same way sometimes.
But i think myabe after mikes first annivarsy i might leave mjjc, im just not sure yet.

I have the feeling many may leave and honestly, I don't know what I'll do over time. Geesh. I don't know what to think. Mundy feels that being here all the time means that grieving hasn't been complete. Maybe I'll come to the same conclusion at some point (?), but I feel for now like I've grieved MORE because I keep coming here, like it's maybe even too much (if there is such a thing). Sometimes I've felt like... agh... I just need to escape and forget it all because of the pain, so I understand the feeling of needing time away. That's really some complex stuff. :mello: I was 24/7 back into my MJ obsession as of last spring, so for me it's over a year now. :mello: And yet I still do other things, you know, so I don't feel like I've lost it. And maybe it's a weird position to be in to run an MJ site that you've sworn to continue for as long as anyone will pay attention (MLP). That right there kind of binds me to a certain degree of MJ-ness in life, at least weekly or so. How that will feel after June 25th... how that will feel in a year or two... I don't know, but I also promised to never let his legacy become unimportant to me. Just how it all fits into "regular life", though... remains to be seen for all of us, I guess. Geesh, it feels so weird to talk about this. In any case, Michael has really changed me, changed my life and whether I'm doing something that involves his name or not, I'll be continuing with what he's taught me and all the things I've gone through and learned because of him and all of you. Wow, I'm really kind of turning inside out at the moment... feels so weird. You've both got me going a bit crazy inside with thoughts and emotions that don't really want to come to the surface. And it's 6am and I need to go to bed :doh: Goodnight, you guys. :hug: :heart: :angel:

Want to add: The way I feel right now... unsure of the future, where am I headed, how do I feel, why do I feel disconnected... what's going on? This is how I've felt for a couple of days now. Something's changed. But then early in the week I had all those "we're connected, we're one" dreams. So confusing. And last night... geez. I cried my head off for a good 3 hours over times in the past when I felt I could've been more supportive of Michael or that I somehow failed him in some little way. Just tortured the hell out of myself, basically. :rolleyes2: I thought I'd dealt with all of that months ago, even "talked to Michael" one night about it, told him every thought and how I'd felt at whichever time all while imagining I was looking directly into his eyes. And after that I was alright inside because I felt everything was ok. But then last night out of the blue it all came back with a vengeance and I eventually found myself feeling shut off and... unworthy in some way, I guess. Then tortured by thoughts that if by feeling unworthy I'd be putting myself out of 'the circle', so to speak. Like if you feel you're not good enough, the universe will reflect that, so by not being able to "get over" my own inadequecies I'm actually reinforcing the negative emotions and situations I don't want. (How CRAZY is it right now that Alanis Morissette's song "Perfect" just started playing ... all about trying to be good enough and feeling guilty if you can't measure up. Wow.) Ok, so a little bit of hardcore thread therapy and iPodomancy before bedtime :lol: Heading off now... :angel:

 

[CaptainEoLove85]

Guys I need a break for a while. To be honest, I have put my life on hold for the last 10 months. I spend about 12 hours in front of my computer every day, if not more. All day every day all I think about is Michael. It's unhealthy. I spent a healthy amount of time listening to his music before June. I didn't need a forum because for years I was the only MJ fan I knew and I didn't know what it was like to be around people who felt the same way. I really needed people who get me since June and I relied too heavily on it. I never grieved properly because I let myself into this world where it's always about Michael and he's always here. It actually hasn't hit me yet. I'm afraid of that but I'm just numbing myself spending all this time here.

I'll be back when I can trust myself to log off after a short period of time.

I love you guys. I really, really do :heart: and I'll be participating in MLP regardless.

:heart::group::heart:

btw, I gave neeve my email address and this isn't anything anyone needs to worry about. I just need a bit of a break. Love you guys :heart:

It's understandable. I'm currently trying to sort out my life right now, so I know I might eventually have to spend less time here, or at least cut back on certain websites. It's all about balance. Sometimes you just have to get out and stay focused on what's really important. It can be really tough. I know I feel like I'm attached to Michael. Like I think he's going to disappear if I'm not thinking about him in some way or listening to his music, but I know he's not really going to go anywhere. It's still hard.

But anyway, go ahead and take that break. It's probably a good idea, and good luck.

Want to add: The way I feel right now... unsure of the future, where am I headed, how do I feel, why do I feel disconnected... what's going on? This is how I've felt for a couple of days now. Something's changed. But then early in the week I had all those "we're connected, we're one" dreams. So confusing. And last night... geez. I cried my head off for a good 3 hours over times in the past when I felt I could've been more supportive of Michael or that I somehow failed him in some little way. Just tortured the hell out of myself, basically. I thought I'd dealt with all of that months ago, even "talked to Michael" one night about it, told him every thought and how I'd felt at whichever time all while imagining I was looking directly into his eyes. And after that I was alright inside because I felt everything was ok. But then last night out of the blue it all came back with a vengeance and I eventually found myself feeling shut off and... unworthy in some way, I guess. Then tortured by thoughts that if by feeling unworthy I'd be putting myself out of 'the circle', so to speak. Like if you feel you're not good enough, the universe will reflect that, so by not being able to "get over" my own inadequecies I'm actually reinforcing the negative emotions and situations I don't want. (How CRAZY is it right now that Alanis Morissette's song "Perfect" just started playing ... all about trying to be good enough and feeling guilty if you can't measure up. Wow.) Ok, so a little bit of hardcore thread therapy and iPodomancy before bedtime Heading off now...

Oh I've been there. I think of so many ways I could have had Michael more in my life when he was alive. I think of all the different moments I could have turned into a more dedicated fan, but it just didn't happen. In the end, it just really drives me insane :crazy:, and I should try not to think about that because I can't change the past. I know Michael doesn't care about that and probably completely understands. He'd probably say to chill out already or something :lol: Sometimes you just can't help yourself though.

 

[Bee]

Well, maybe it really wasn't a good time for it. Sounds like Mrs Music actually had the best time, lol

Lolol! Sorry to hear it didn't really work out this time for some of you! I guess I'd say mine didn't work out either, but the emotion I was having kind of pulled me in it here and there, but nah....wasn't a great one at allllll. Bad time I guess indeed. :lol:

I was going to tell this story the other day (don't think I have in the past) and relates to the "is this real?" theme.
...

Holy shit! That's some crazy stuff man! I can imagine how stunned you must've been when finding out all those facts. Really interesting....wonder what you had 'to do' with the situation that pulled you into there, hmmm. Maybe you'll even found out things in a later time? Or there wasn't really a reason, could be as well I guess.....but whoa. Craaaazy. :blink:

Guys I need a break for a while.
...

Aww...I know what you mean...sometimes you need to take a break from whatever it is to get back to yourself and reflect on things and find balance and stuff, so I wish you good luck and I hope you'll be back soon, girl! :huggy:


About leaving; don't you guys go leave us hereee! :bugeyed Lol! I know it's sometimes so weird to be like...online...have friends here...that it can take away all your time and that it's healthier to just get out for a while, but like...seriously leaving for good? I couldn't do that. Maybe it's my generation, but I have like half (if it isn't more) of my social life through the internet and I couldn't do without. Even though I sometimes feel like I should knock it off to be able to do more 'real life stuff' like reading, watching movies, all things I want to learn. But for instance this thread, I'm learning so much! The experiences I have here are so precious and there's so much to discover through the internet. The world is so much more 'at your feet' it kind of feels like? So much more 'globally', hmm. When I'm specifically talking about MJ boards - I really think it's great to be so connected all over the world and I'm so glad I found these cool boards now....it's amazing. It helps me cope, it helps me to get support, to have friends even outside my country, to just feel...connected, also with Michael.

So yeah....I wasn't planning on leaving now or someday in the future, I do need to take some more breaks to be able to do some more stuff I want to do outside of the internet and so on, but....I'll be here. Who joins me?

 

[Tinkerbell2]

Technically, yes, but it seems you didn't really miss much since we didn't seem to really do anything but have some weird glimpses and flashes

Ahhh ... Oh Okay!

 

[MJJLaugh]

Hi guys, just wanted to reply to a few things I'm reading here that confirm what I intuitively picked up, or like the mentalist I recognize patterns in people...

A friend of mine was always (overthinking) everything. It had to be explained in a logical manner or she couldn't grasp it. She suffered migraines, problems with the liver and a whiplash. I kept saying to her: you are very intuitive, so you KNOW from your inner self, please dare to rely on it, for it does not lie to you. I had to say it very often and finally she did dare to rely on it, so her intuition grew and it helped her in dealing with the complex problem her children suffered from ( also all highly sensitive).
The reason I'm telling you this is is that there are people in this thread who the same applies to, that is my gut feeling and my gut feeling is almost always right.

Asedora and Mjbunny please dare to rely on your intuition. Don't overthink it or try to find logical explanations. You will be less plagued by headaches if you rely more on your intuition.

Mrs. Music Sorry to hear about your family situation being so trying for you and things not working out. Lots of hugs to you my dear!!

Yesterday's meditation - I tried to meditate but it didn't work at all. It was just totally nothing that came up. On the other hand I had a dream aboutboars. There was a bunch of them and they had all climbed a tree and some were lying at the bottom of the tree.
I looked up the meaning of boars in dreams and the way they were in my dreams it implied lively changes at work and good business. If you heard boars ( just like if you hear owls, in another dream I had) it is a prediction of a death around you.
I keep dreaming about animals, that if heard, symbolize death. It creeps me out a little! Luckily I did not hear the owls or the boars so I'll take that as unlikely...

Mundy - Please take good care of yourself and allow room for other things as well. Good for you, to take more room for yourself! :hug:

Haven't read the last two pages so I might reply later to other things!
Take care girls! :heart:

 

[Louise.]

Mundy - Aw, we'll miss not seeing you here regularly, but it's good that you've decided to do this, and take more time out for yourself. Take care! :heart:


mjbunny - I also have a feeling that quite a lot of people will be leaving at some point in the near future. I personally don't feel like I could leave, not for a long, long while yet anyway. It helps so much to be around people who feel the same, but sometimes it does help to stay offline for a bit, and focus more on everyday life and stuff. I guess we'll just have to see what happens.. :sigh: Hopefully we'll all be together for a long while yet. :group:

Speak later everyone.

 

[darlingdear]

I had the weirdest dream. I took Katherine out to dinner (with my parents too..) and I was so shy! Everything she said I would just blush and giggle shyly! And! Eddie Murphy was the waiter :lol: We both ordered chocolate ice cream, yumyumyum.

Mundy - :huggy: We understand. Just take all the time you need and come back when you want to. Will miss not seeing you around, take care :heart:

mjbunny - :bugeyed...wow, that is crazy! I'm amazed.

On the subject of people leaving I know what you guys mean. I was thinking about this last night before I went to sleep. Where will this site be in a year, two years from now? Where will we be? Will there be any new members joining a year, two years after June 25th? It will be sad seeing people leave , especially if and when people start leaving this spiritual fam, but I guess that is their decision; we gotta do what right for us.
I get what Mundy says about not feeling like she's grieved. I sometimes think that, am I just prolonging my acceptance? Being thrown into all things MJ all the time? But I feel that although I may not accept MJ is gone, I'm dealing with that and this place helps, for the time being. I think for me, listening to his music, reading the experiences here, keeps that little bit of MJ-ness going in my life, it helps me to keep him alive, so to speak. Or am I just..:sigh: Oh I dunno what I'm talking about. I just know for the time being, everything fits in with my everyday life. Trying to make this all coherant is so hard. There's too many questions, what if's. I think it's best to..live in the moment, you know? Be here now. I just hope we will all be here for a while yet..:huggy:
What I will say is that I'm so glad I found this thread. Not just in terms of MJ, but in general. The spiritual side of life has always fascinated me and just to read and learn about it all here, is awesome. And to have this network of connections around the world is amazing.

I can't say where I'll be this time next year? Still here? Whether I am still here or not, I know I will continue to love MJ, to keep his legacy alive because he's anchored himself well and truly in my heart :heart:.
(I think that psychiatrists would have a field day reading all that up there that I wrote :lol: It sounds so bizarre & incoherant.)

 

[*Little Suzie*]

Hi Suzie The thread began with a message posted about a psychic/medium saying she'd received a message from Michael via channeling. Since then it's grown into a place for people to freely share and talk about things like dreams of Michael or anything that you may feel has been a 'visit' or communication from him. We also talk a lot about spirituality in general, often not related to MJ. Welcome to the thread ... if it's not too weird for you

Well.. I had been here before and shared my dreams, because someone told me to post it here, but I never got about what this thread really is about xD. THANK YOU

 

[darlingdear]

Well.. I had been here before and shared my dreams, because someone told me to post it here, but I never got about what this thread really is about xD. THANK YOU

Welcome to the thread, Suzie :flowers:

 

[8701girl]

[
I have the feeling many may leave and honestly, I don't know what I'll do over time. Geesh. I don't know what to think. Mundy feels that being here all the time means that grieving hasn't been complete. Maybe I'll come to the same conclusion at some point (?), but I feel for now like I've grieved MORE because I keep coming here, like it's maybe even too much (if there is such a thing). Sometimes I've felt like... agh... I just need to escape and forget it all because of the pain, so I understand the feeling of needing time away. That's really some complex stuff. :mello: I was 24/7 back into my MJ obsession as of last spring, so for me it's over a year now. :mello: And yet I still do other things, you know, so I don't feel like I've lost it. And maybe it's a weird position to be in to run an MJ site that you've sworn to continue for as long as anyone will pay attention (MLP). That right there kind of binds me to a certain degree of MJ-ness in life, at least weekly or so. How that will feel after June 25th... how that will feel in a year or two... I don't know, but I also promised to never let his legacy become unimportant to me. Just how it all fits into "regular life", though... remains to be seen for all of us, I guess. Geesh, it feels so weird to talk about this. In any case, Michael has really changed me, changed my life and whether I'm doing something that involves his name or not, I'll be continuing with what he's taught me and all the things I've gone through and learned because of him and all of you. Wow, I'm really kind of turning inside out at the moment... feels so weird. You've both got me going a bit crazy inside with thoughts and emotions that don't really want to come to the surface. And it's 6am and I need to go to bed :doh: Goodnight, you guys. :hug: :heart: :angel:

Want to add: The way I feel right now... unsure of the future, where am I headed, how do I feel, why do I feel disconnected... what's going on? This is how I've felt for a couple of days now. Something's changed. But then early in the week I had all those "we're connected, we're one" dreams. So confusing. And last night... geez. I cried my head off for a good 3 hours over times in the past when I felt I could've been more supportive of Michael or that I somehow failed him in some little way. Just tortured the hell out of myself, basically. :rolleyes2: I thought I'd dealt with all of that months ago, even "talked to Michael" one night about it, told him every thought and how I'd felt at whichever time all while imagining I was looking directly into his eyes. And after that I was alright inside because I felt everything was ok. But then last night out of the blue it all came back with a vengeance and I eventually found myself feeling shut off and... unworthy in some way, I guess. Then tortured by thoughts that if by feeling unworthy I'd be putting myself out of 'the circle', so to speak. Like if you feel you're not good enough, the universe will reflect that, so by not being able to "get over" my own inadequecies I'm actually reinforcing the negative emotions and situations I don't want. (How CRAZY is it right now that Alanis Morissette's song "Perfect" just started playing ... all about trying to be good enough and feeling guilty if you can't measure up. Wow.) Ok, so a little bit of hardcore thread therapy and iPodomancy before bedtime :lol: Heading off now... :angel:[/QUOTE]


That is what hurting me so much right now....the thought of leaving mj & u guys behind.....its scares me.


You guys & him have become a part of me , and to lose that will be like losing my all. Like theres no me without him or u guys, and i know i gotta move on but it frightnes me.

 

[Louise.]

That is what hurting me so much right now....the thought of leaving mj & u guys behind.....its scares me.


You guys & him have become a part of me , and to lose that will be like losing my all. Like theres no me without him or u guys, and i know i gotta move on but it frightnes me.

Aw, I know what you mean. MJ fans are like one big family, the thought of people leaving is hard to think about.. :sigh:

Sending hugs to you and everyone else. :hug:

 

[8701girl]

Sending hugs to u too louise :hug:

 

[amygrace]

Hey lovies! Wow, I got almost 4 pages behind! After I dropped my daughter off yesterday I got inspired to start a painting (I haven't painted since I was like 15!) so I spent the rest of the day all the way till 3am working on it. Didn't end up making it to the meditation of course...but sounds like it was a bust anyway. I was getting the sense it wasn't the most perfect time for it...but was hoping to still read some interesting experiences. Well, better luck next time! Hopefully more of us can join next time too.

Oh...and so glad to hear *Billie Jean* is ok! PHEW.

mjbunny - Holy sh... that telepathic experience you had was wild! Wow. I wonder why your consciousness chose to go there that night though, yeah. Maybe you knew the women or the wreckless driver in a past life...and your soul could sense the trouble so you went to check in on them at that moment. Or, maybe your Guides or your soul just wanted you to have such a telepathic experience just so you could see that it was possible or something. Dunno. Interesting nonetheless.

Amanda - enjoy your little break hon! As everyone else has echoed, I completely understand needing one. :hug:


While we're on the subject...every now and then I also feel like I need to have a day to myself, away from MJJC. 'cause I literally spend hours in here every day. It's nice to have balance...but I can't imagine myself ever leaving this place for good. Honestly it scares me a little just thinking about any of YOU guys leaving for good too! I feel so connected to you all... our whole mjfam, and this little spiritual thread in particular is just like second family to me. I love you guys, I really do. I understand that life happens though and not all of us will always need this place. We all experience it differently too. Like Amanda feels it has stopped her from fully grieving while mjbunny feels it has possibly pushed her into grieving MORE. For me, this place has been the biggest support to help me through grieving... to help heal my soul, to feed it more, and to feel closer to Michael. And not in a delusional way, but in a very real way. Just as he lives through his music he lives through all of us and in our discussions and when we share our memories and beautiful new experiences. Everyone here really helps to keep me in touch with LOVE too. The love we share, how we interact with one another...the ideas we have, the projects we take on...it's always reminding me that all that really matters...is love. I don't think it's unhealthy in any way for me to be here...even if I'm here a lot. If for the next 10 years I spent a couple hours a day in here...I wouldn't find that a waste at all. A couple hours out of my whole day doing something that brings much joy and happiness into my life... worth it. :heart:

Much love to you all today. :group:

 

[mjbunny]

Morning, everyone :hug: Another day, another feeling. I was all weirded out last night before bed and woke up this morning and saw that something I left downloading had completed, opened the files to check and I saw ... Michael! :wub: So basically I'm feeling in a better place :lol:

But all morning I was dreaming about Murray in some way. :bugeyed He was on TV screens, like mini documentaries about him, his picture was on newspapers and magazines, people were talking about him. Generally people were saying he was irresponsible and a basically bad guy, referring to baby-mamas and child support and maybe drug use and too much partying on the side. They said he'd been in prison for "20 years" earlier in life. I thought... in a past life then? Again I was left with the impression that what happened to Michael was an accident due to carelessness. Then as I was just starting to wake up I was thinking that Murray had done away with himself and I thought oh geez, people are gonna wig when they find out this news. :no: And now we'll never get the truth about what happened June 25th...

Holy shit! That's some crazy stuff man! I can imagine how stunned you must've been when finding out all those facts. Really interesting....wonder what you had 'to do' with the situation that pulled you into there, hmmm. Maybe you'll even found out things in a later time? Or there wasn't really a reason, could be as well I guess.....but whoa. Craaaazy. :blink:

It is crazy, yes. And like I said, what does that tell us about consciousness? I'm sure it's not just me that goes wandering about while sleeping, lolol, so what's going on then?

About leaving; don't you guys go leave us hereee! :bugeyed Lol! I know it's sometimes so weird to be like...online...have friends here...that it can take away all your time and that it's healthier to just get out for a while, but like...seriously leaving for good? I couldn't do that. Maybe it's my generation, but I have like half (if it isn't more) of my social life through the internet and I couldn't do without. ....
So yeah....I wasn't planning on leaving now or someday in the future, I do need to take some more breaks to be able to do some more stuff I want to do outside of the internet and so on, but....I'll be here. Who joins me?

Oh me too because everyone lives all over the darned planet, lol. Friends moved away, then I moved away and I live in another country now :doh: My mother is often worried about me, saying that I'm too isolated, but I honestly don't feel that way. I've got my hubby, who's my best friend, and I talk with you guys all the time and friends and family back home via emails and phone calls... I just feel ok with the situation, weird or not. I don't how I'd survive with the internet. I hope it never goes away via pole shifts or wars or attacks. I would seriously freak out! I'm not planning to leave MJJC, no. But last night I was feeling all... God, is there something wrong with me? Am I just dragging things out? But I feel alright today, so I guess it was just a mood. In the end, MJ has been part of my life for 26 years now, so why should that change? I wasn't always "active" in the fan community, but Michael has and always will be part of my life in some way.

Asedora and Mjbunny please dare to rely on your intuition. Don't overthink it or try to find logical explanations. You will be less plagued by headaches if you rely more on your intuition.

Cute. Last night I got a rune reading about communication with the other side, about what I can do to improve clarity. What stood in the way as an obstacle/what works against me was Othila. That's the homeland, things inheritied. We were theorizing that it may simply be inherent gifts and/or lack of them that stand as obstacles... you know how psychic abilities tend to run in families, so perhaps there's something genetic. (They're actually finding this in brains now... temporal lobe differences between people seem to correspond to whether they have mystical experiences or not). But also we considered it may have to do with western CULTURE. That's also inherited... doubting, questioning, trying to be logical and pick things apart, needing proof, etc. So, lol, jives with what you just wrote The headaches... well, that's the time of year I think. It's hazy and bright and pollen everywhere, ugh.

About your boars dream... weird, but maybe it's about some wild part of you? Just thinking outloud. My husband had a dream this morning and actually remembered it. It was about seeing missiles being fired and then exploding onto the ground... so death as well in some way.

mjbunny - I also have a feeling that quite a lot of people will be leaving at some point in the near future. I personally don't feel like I could leave, not for a long, long while yet anyway. It helps so much to be around people who feel the same, but sometimes it does help to stay offline for a bit, and focus more on everyday life and stuff. I guess we'll just have to see what happens.. :sigh: Hopefully we'll all be together for a long while yet. :group:

:hug: Me too. But I think sometimes I need a break of a day or two, you know. But I have no intention of leaving here either.

...except for a few minutes right now, lolol.... will have to finish writing in a bit...

 

[mjbunny]

Amygrace - Well said. I feel that way too. I know that someone might say I have a problem or internet addiction sometimes, lolol, but in any case I believe that it's what I need at times, and I think I'll always be spending some time on most days around here. And I also don't want to lose all of you. :hug:

I had the weirdest dream. I took Katherine out to dinner (with my parents too..) and I was so shy! Everything she said I would just blush and giggle shyly! And! Eddie Murphy was the waiter :lol: We both ordered chocolate ice cream, yumyumyum.

:lol: Maybe Katherine was really just Michael in disguise, hence the giggliness, lol

What I will say is that I'm so glad I found this thread. Not just in terms of MJ, but in general. The spiritual side of life has always fascinated me and just to read and learn about it all here, is awesome. And to have this network of connections around the world is amazing. I can't say where I'll be this time next year? Still here? Whether I am still here or not, I know I will continue to love MJ, to keep his legacy alive because he's anchored himself well and truly in my heart :heart:.
(I think that psychiatrists would have a field day reading all that up there that I wrote :lol: It sounds so bizarre & incoherant.)

:lol: about psychiatrists. Yeah, I know. But they'd have said we were crazy a year ago as well before the unthinkable happened. I could say that so many of us have had years to ponder and think about our relationship with MJ, to wonder about ourselves and the why's of it all and if we're crazy or not, lol, so in the end I'm pretty comfortable with the fact that I love him so deeply and that he'll always be part of my life. It's just the way it is. :heart:

You guys & him have become a part of me , and to lose that will be like losing my all. Like theres no me without him or u guys, and i know i gotta move on but it frightnes me.

I guess it depends on what "moving on" is to each individual. Moving on doesn't have to mean forgetting someone and pretending they never existed. These months have been very tough. I remember last fall for a while I was thinking of just putting AWAY all my MJ stuff... just AWAY... because I felt I was going crazy with all the pain and reminders. I was thinking how when I'd break up with a guy I'd been with for ages and was so heartbroken that the only thing that worked was to just pretend they never existed. No pictures, no thoughts... just stay entirely away from anything to do with them. I had thoughts back then that maybe this would be my only way of dealing with Michael now, for my own sanity. But that thought hurt so badly I realized there's no way. And why should I??? I know that I don't need to. Michael is also so much JOY to me. I'm not going to discard years of joy and love and inspiration and his legacy (because so much of it is up to us) because of this pain. So that's where I went with that line of thinking/feeling. It has to all be integrated somehow for me, especially being in an MJ couple. Michael will always be in our home, there's just no way around it. (And I don't want a way around it.) I've needed these months of Michael 24/7. Really needed them. I don't know how else I could've survived (possibly literally?) without still feeling that joy and without having all of you to share with :hug:

 

[Neeve]

Hey everyone,

Amanda, I already said this to you, but best of luck, I'm sending you support through this. We're always here for you!

About leaving MJJC.... you know, when June 25th happened, I wasn't part of a forum, and it was a busy time for me because I was moving home from Portugal so I didn't have time to be online...and that kick-started serious grieving, because I had to go through it alone. So when I came here, everything I encountered just propelled that more.. so like mjbunny, I feel being here has made me grieve more. I do find I need to take breaks, but to be honest, I can't see myself leaving...and like Amy said, the thought of losing touch with anyone in this thread upsets me...you all have been such an important part of my spiritual development and exploring this side of Michael that many don't see. I will have to take breaks - for example when I move to the freakin jungle in June!!! - but I feel like I will always be back. :wub:

 

[Bee]

Thanks everyone for the lovely support words about my fam situation, know I'm always there for you guys too! :huggy:

While we're on the subject...every now and then I also feel like I need to have a day to myself, away from MJJC. 'cause I literally spend hours in here every day. It's nice to have balance...but I can't imagine myself ever leaving this place for good. Honestly it scares me a little just thinking about any of YOU guys leaving for good too! I feel so connected to you all... our whole mjfam, and this little spiritual thread in particular is just like second family to me. I love you guys, I really do. I understand that life happens though and not all of us will always need this place. We all experience it differently too. Like Amanda feels it has stopped her from fully grieving while mjbunny feels it has possibly pushed her into grieving MORE. For me, this place has been the biggest support to help me through grieving... to help heal my soul, to feed it more, and to feel closer to Michael. And not in a delusional way, but in a very real way. Just as he lives through his music he lives through all of us and in our discussions and when we share our memories and beautiful new experiences. Everyone here really helps to keep me in touch with LOVE too. The love we share, how we interact with one another...the ideas we have, the projects we take on...it's always reminding me that all that really matters...is love. I don't think it's unhealthy in any way for me to be here...even if I'm here a lot. If for the next 10 years I spent a couple hours a day in here...I wouldn't find that a waste at all. A couple hours out of my whole day doing something that brings much joy and happiness into my life... worth it. :heart:

I also find it scary to think of what the future might bring and if some of you guys might leave, I know we'll be having lots of cool things to experience all together and I truly hope we get to be together for a long while, whatever life might bring.

Further, completely feel the same....not much to add on that. :huggy:

Morning, everyone :hug:

MORNING? I thought you were from Germany? You didn't really just got up did you? :lmao:

But all morning I was dreaming about Murray in some way. :bugeyed

Brrr....crazy stuff. :better:

Oh me too because everyone lives all over the darned planet, lol. Friends moved away, then I moved away and I live in another country now :doh: My mother is often worried about me, saying that I'm too isolated, but I honestly don't feel that way. I've got my hubby, who's my best friend, and I talk with you guys all the time and friends and family back home via emails and phone calls... I just feel ok with the situation, weird or not. I don't how I'd survive with the internet. I hope it never goes away via pole shifts or wars or attacks. I would seriously freak out! I'm not planning to leave MJJC, no. But last night I was feeling all... God, is there something wrong with me? Am I just dragging things out? But I feel alright today, so I guess it was just a mood. In the end, MJ has been part of my life for 26 years now, so why should that change? I wasn't always "active" in the fan community, but Michael has and always will be part of my life in some way.

Completely feeling the same here as well, yes!

About leaving MJJC.... you know, when June 25th happened, I wasn't part of a forum, and it was a busy time for me because I was moving home from Portugal so I didn't have time to be online...and that kick-started serious grieving, because I had to go through it alone. So when I came here, everything I encountered just propelled that more.. so like mjbunny, I feel being here has made me grieve more. I do find I need to take breaks, but to be honest, I can't see myself leaving...and like Amy said, the thought of losing touch with anyone in this thread upsets me...you all have been such an important part of my spiritual development and exploring this side of Michael that many don't see. I will have to take breaks - for example when I move to the freakin jungle in June!!! - but I feel like I will always be back. :wub:

Same here once again! Lolol. Aw, we're gonna miss you when you're in the jungle! Maybe you can pop in once in a while through an internet cafe or something? But whoa, you're gonna get such massive experiences out there!

 

[Neeve]

Same here once again! Lolol. Aw, we're gonna miss you when you're in the jungle! Maybe you can pop in once in a while through an internet cafe or something? But whoa, you're gonna get such massive experiences out there!

:better:
well, I'll actually be living in the Amazon, a few hours' drive from any town...lol. But it's only for 6 weeks...