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Goodnight Michael

Aw,so beautiful, Becca.. brought tears to my eyes. I wish I could be wherever Michael is now. I would die for Michael, I would do anything for him if it could make his come back! I am now shaking again, just cant escape from the suffering inside...This hurts so much. I can't stop crying. God help me. :weeping:
 
Dear Michael,

I wrote this to MJ some time ago, but it makes a lot of sense to me tonight... so here it is:

I wish I had been the music in your life. I miss you like crazy, Mike... I even think I am a bit mad at you, for you left so soon. But no... it was just in time. Your time.

Please sleep well now. You'd better do it, for the next time you wake up, I promise I will stick to you until you teach me the whole "Billie Jean" dance, just as in Motown 25...and you know that is going to be an extremely hard work.

But we'll never have you working day and night again, Mike. We are trying to learn our lessons here... sleep now, for it might take us some time.

I wish there was something, anything, I could say to really express my feelings. But I can't. I can only wish the next time you open your eyes you find yourself sorrounded by the ones you love the most.

I love you.
I admire you.
I respect you.
I miss you.
You are the music (and the dance!!) in my life...

I will study harder and I will trust God. He is not unfair to forget all the good you did.

Love you so much, Michael!!!
 
"In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream..." This statement is from the very beautiful and touching speech Michael gave at Oxford University in 2001. I've been so touched with this line since I first came across with it and it has been one of my all-time personal favourite quotes. So inspiring, so uplifting, so Michael! Even when in despair, even when in deep pain, even when faced with hard obstacles, one must never give up, one must never lose faith... we must still dare to dream!
 
Without You

I'm sitting here without you,
Only with tears in my eyes,
I never knew I could love someone this much,
But now everyone knows how I loved you.

I'm sitting here all alone,
With my precious heart, broken,
I don't know what to do,
There was some words left unspoken.

I'm sitting here so quiet,
Looking outside my window,
A tear rolls down my cheek,
Only yesterday, you said you had to go.

I'm sitting here so lonely,
No-one to speak to,
No-one to say they're there,
To lighten my darkest days,
Showing that someone still cares.

I'm sitting here so tired,
Ready to fall asleep,
But when I go to close my eyes,
A tear slowly falls,
And I try so hard to no longer cry,
I wanna close my eyes and slowly die.
 
I miss you so much... I don't know what can I say because I still don't believe it...this is like a dream bad dream...I wish that you wake me up and hug me with all love. I always dreamed that someday I'll stand on your life way and you'll love like I love you...but this day will never happen...Michael I love you and I'll want that you love me too, my Angel...

I really hope I'll see you in my dreams tonight Michael, but until then, goodnight, and I love you always!

 
*Billie Jean* said:
That was beautiful.. :cry:
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Dear Billie :hug:
We love you very much too, friend, please don't forget it. We don't have to say bye to Mike. We just have to say See you soon. We love him and I hope you will sleep well tonight, dear. Big, big hugs, Billie!
 
:cry: God the pain can be so intense sometimes. My heart is shattered in a million pieces. Its hard to sleep sometimes and I really feel my condition is deteriorating.
I would give anything to have you back or just to see your smile one time or hear you sing for us a melody. :cry: Goodnight my sweet angel. Im going to bed to hopefully dream of you.
 
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Beccabubbles said:
AN ANGEL WALKS BESIDE ME

An angel walks beside me,
I feel him everyday.
He helps me through lifes ups and downs,
and whatever comes my way.

He guides me down the road of life,
and lights the darkest roads.
He picks me up and carries me,
when I can not bear the load.

He helps to ease the pain I feel,
he mends my spirit too.
He holds my hand, and shelters me,
and gives me courage and strength, too.

He speaks to me with words of love,
and he listens to my pleas.
He was sent here from the sky above,
to guide and comfort me.

I know he's always watching,
though his form I can not see,
Its a love I feel deep in my heart,
that leads me to believe.

An angel walks beside me,
I feel him everyday,
The presence of this angel,
will never go away.

I love and miss you Michael,
Thank you for being there.
You will always be my Angel.
Goodnight.
xxx
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:cry: I miss you Mike so much. You will always be our angel.
 
Last night I went to bed and burst to tears. I just couldn't stop crying. I called out for you to come and help me sleep. I was crying with my eyes closed and suddenly I felt your breath in the darkness and a very tender stroke in my forehead. I fell deeply asleep for the first time after 6 months. Don't ever leave me..
 
Sometimes it gets hard to breathe
Other times I cant sleep
Thinking of your last moments
Cuts me deep

I find refuge in the promises of the Lord
You're all in a better place
Surrounded by love
And kept forever safe

But it gets hard sometimes
I wake in the middle of the night and just cry
Tomorrow brings hope of change
And all I can do right now is try

I want to be strong
But sometimes I forget how
Life is passing by me in a blur
I have to start living for You now

Things will never be the same
I keep asking why
Why did it have to be you?
Why did you have to die??
 
PCR said:
Dear Billie :hug:
We love you very much too, friend, please don't forget it. We don't have to say bye to Mike. We just have to say See you soon. We love him and I hope you will sleep well tonight, dear. Big, big hugs, Billie!
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I thank you dear friend for your love.. My heart is broken forever and ever. I cry endlessly. I don't know how we are going to get through the rest of our lives without him, I really don't... I have surrendered to God, I have given up, I've been down on my knees praying, this is way too big for me, I need His grace to get me through a minute at a time... sometimes a breath at a time (that's if I'm breathing!).................
 
badtourgirl said:
I hope that you don't... I read what you write every day.
You express the words we all feel - but can't pour onto the page as eloquently as you...
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Thanks.. I just wanna be where he is.. I can't stop crying right now, I miss him....There is no words in this world to describe what I feel for him. I miss him every second of my life.. I think about him all the time :weeping:
 
Somewhere in my dreams tonight,
I'll see you standing there.
You look at me with a smile,
"Life isn't always fair".

It's said to be that angels,
Are sent from above.
I've always had my angel,
whose heart was filled with love.


Michael,
While there's a heart in me, you'll be a part of me.
I love you for eternity.

Becca

xxx
 
Need You Here

If only you were here,
To take away my tears,
Tell me it's alright,
And got nothing to fear.

I cry when you're gone,
Running out of my mind,
Attempts to calm myself,
But peace I cannot find.

These past weeks were horrible,
I'm not sure what I should do,
Holding on by a thread,
My heart turning blue.

It's still beating for you,
But without you it's so sad,
Feeling dead on the inside,
It's hurting just too bad.
 
Michael, my heart is truly broken. With tears in my heart I truly miss you. Time never heals. The scars remains. It's been six months, but I still can't sleep at night. Can't see why you were taken away from us. We still need you down here on earth. I can't accept you're gone! I'm still waiting for you to come back, but in my heart, I know you won't. :weeping: I love you Michael.. so much!
 
Each time they say your name,
A tear forms in my eye.
How can I be happy,
If all I do is cry?

You wern't supposed to leave us.
This has to be a dream.
I cant accept your absence,
And take goodbye for what it means.

It's left me lost and broken,
I still can't find my way
Months have passed real slowly,
But it's harder every day.

I will never forget you
Though we are far apart.
I miss you so much Michael,
And love you with all my heart.

Goodnight Michael.
xxx
 
*Billie Jean* said:
I thank you dear friend for your love.. My heart is broken forever and ever. I cry endlessly. I don't know how we are going to get through the rest of our lives without him, I really don't... I have surrendered to God, I have given up, I've been down on my knees praying, this is way too big for me, I need His grace to get me through a minute at a time... sometimes a breath at a time (that's if I'm breathing!).................
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Billie... I might be wrong, but at some point, maybe we should simply stop fighting this feeling. Maybe we should try to accept the fact the pain is going to be a part of our lives, but not in a terrible way. I mean, honestly... can we forget him? I can't. And I don't mean to. So the pain is here, it's real, it's raw and it's now part of my life. Maybe we have to try to discover a new way to live with this feeling in a more possitive way, if there is anything like that.

Sorry... this might be just random and silly talking from me. It's just my way to get a bit of sense out of all this... if any....

:hug: Billie. Hope you find him in your dreams tonight.
 
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MJstarlight said:
:cry: God the pain can be so intense sometimes. My heart is shattered in a million pieces. Its hard to sleep sometimes and I really feel my condition is deteriorating.
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Oh, dear, this is so bad :(
I hope you feel a bit better today. Please take care of you, be good to you, sleep, eat properly, don't give up. Please, please, we need you here and I am sure you will find the strenght in you to fight this battle too. You have been his loyal fan for so long... just hold on. Hold on and you will make it again and again... as always.

:hug:
 
PCR said:
Billie... I might be wrong, but at some point, maybe we should simply stop fighting this feeling. Maybe we should try to accept the fact the pain is going to be a part of our lives, but in a terrible way. I mean, honestly... can we forget him? I can't. And I don't mean to. So the pain is here, it's real, it's raw and it's now part of my life. Maybe we have to try to discover a new way to live with this feeling in a more possitive way, if there is anything like that.

Sorry... this might be just random and silly talking from me. It's just my way to get a bit of sense out of all this... if any....

:hug: Billie. Hope you find him in your dreams tonight.
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Thanks, my friend. You know, a few times I found myself saying he's not all that just to convince myself I have to move on, isn't that horrid? He was always all that to me. I don't want to move on from him, but a part of me is going to have to, this is too painful. :weeping:
 
*Billie Jean* said:
Thanks, my friend. You know, a few times I found myself saying he's not all that just to convince myself I have to move on, isn't that horrid? He was always all that to me. I don't want to move on from him, but a part of me is going to have to, this is too painful. :weeping:
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But do you feel that overcoming the pain is like forgetting Michael?
I don't think so. How could we do that? We can't! He is PART of our lives. We can't let him go and we don't have to do so. We must find a new way to live our feelings for Michael, and that is going to take us some time. A long time maybe.
 
PCR said:
But do you feel that overcoming the pain is like forgetting Michael?
I don't think so. How could we do that? We can't! He is PART of our lives. We can't let him go and we don't have to do so. We must find a new way to live our feelings for Michael, and that is going to take us some time. A long time maybe.
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I'll never forget him.. :no: I try to hard to keep busy, and keep my mind off of him but it's very hard to do.. I love him more than anything in the whole world. Not a day has gone by since I was 6 years old that I didn't think of him. Not a day has passed since I was 6 years old that I didn't love him. I also want to die.. I'm by myself, and I'm scared, I'm scared... I've never been totally alone, without him. So I ask myself how could I fill this space? With what? I cry, cry, cry... and my eyes can never again get dry till the day I die.
 
*Billie Jean* said:
I'll never forget him.. :no: I try to hard to keep busy, and keep my mind off of him but it's very hard to do.. I love him more than anything in the whole world. Not a day has gone by since I was 6 years old that I didn't think of him. Not a day has passed since I was 6 years old that I didn't love him. I also want to die.. I'm by myself, and I'm scared, I'm scared... I've never been totally alone, without him. So I ask myself how could I fill this space? With what? I cry, cry, cry... and my eyes can never again get dry till the day I die.
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I know what you feel but God wants us to learn a lesson. This is why we have to live our lives. God knows when is your time to go . Just live your life, cry, smile do whatever you think is right. Just try to do something good for this world for ppl around you. This is what Michael would want us to do. Do it like you would do it for him.
When time will come every fan will see Michael. Nobody stays here forever. Life is short.

Good night my angel Michael. I know you are in a better place now.
 
Lonely Longing

The night was stormy, brunches hitting the windows,
But I dreamed of you and felt safe in your embrace.
The sweetness of your touch, your voice so low,
Kept the cold away and the warmth on my face.

The waking hours swept away the dreams of the night,
Cares of the day came and occupied my mind.
But still I could remember my dreams and sigh,
Lonely longing for what is tender and kind.

Now I lay down at night, wanting to fall asleep,
So I can dream again with you, my dear.
But the dreams don't come and I quietly weep
Because not even in them I can keep you near.
 
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