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Sorry...I have to open up

Hey Maria, I got your e-mail. Sorry, I haven't responded yet, Just know that I'm thinking of you and your Mom and praying that they will be able to do something to help her soon. I know you are at your wits end, girl, but, don't give up, hang in there and ignore those family members who are getting on your nerves. Love to your Mom *hug*
 
.................Gosh,I'm really speechless hun:no:
I wish I could do something to help:yes::better::yes:

((((((((((((((warm hug))))))))))))))))))))))))
 
Mariajoaosilva said:
It's completly heart broken,that i have to tell all of you that my mother will not have surgery this year.

I think that her doctor is waiting for things to happen in a normal way,so she keeps making excuses to postpone the surgery.
For the past month,we have been living in a complete ckaos,because of my mother's doctor that was saying every week,that my mother would have surgery in the end of that week.

Yesterday i gotvery scared with my mother because she woke up not being able to moove her hands,and in pain.I called my family doctor that told me that she needed to go to the hospital imediatly,and that her doctor from the hospital,should know what was happening as well.
I should know how to say no to my mom and make her do things the way i am told.But because i am weak,and no one takes me serious here,everything i tried to do or said,was ignored,and i was even screamed at,by my brother,and my sister in law.

At one point i lost control of me,and told them all to go to hell,and that if they knew better,that their mother could go with them,to be taking cared of.
Of course they didn't say another word when i said this.cowards...
Anyways...with all this,i was not able to do what i wanted,and i had to wait till today to call to the hospital doctor,and see what she would say.

As i thought,but no one ever listens to what i say,the stupid doctor,said it was no big deal,and that shecould only do the surgery next year.
My mom has to go to an appoitment on jan 6th,to schedule the surgery.

Yeah right...see if i believe this hypocrite,selfish,cold doctor!
But what can i do alone?no one believes a word i say.

I swear that if something happens during this time that we must wait,that i will punish myself very badly if noone does,because i should be able to make others listen to me,and to to things.
Of course...when i said this,i had people screaming again...but see if i care.

When my mom closes her eyes,this family will have a big suprise from me.
What will happen,only God knows,but i can tell you that this bunch of fake people will rememeber me for a very long time.oh yes...but than it will be too late!

Sorry people for this mesage...but i am so tired of everything!
I'm tired of having to be strong for my mother!
I'm tired of having to hang in here!
I'm so tired of not having a life!

Does my family cares?of course not!
Click to expand...

Maria; please believe that you will have a life after this. And please do not waste any of the little energy you have left to plan for revenge over your family. They are not worth it. The only successful revenge will be that after this you cut them off, and create a good life for yourself. When your mother eventually pass, you can stand tall, knowing your did everything you possibly could. You will also knnow that your family did not help you, or your mother. Pleasse know that nobody can change people unless they want to change. You do not have that kind of power over your family.

I do know what you are going through, by personal experience. As I have told you before. Yet everyone has their own unique sircumstances, and their own challenges.
Just please know that you are not the cause of this, and do not hurt yourself in an attempt to make your family understand your pain.
Because you will not succeed. After reading your posts,and understanding your situation- its hopeless to try to make them do the right thing.
In the end all you can rely on is yourself.

Some times the brutal truth is that people just dont care about you. and while that is scary to realise, its better to acknowledge that and the consequences it has, because its sets us free. It stops the false hope for help and relief. And makes is easier to see our limitations of solving the situation.

You can only love your mother, and do the best you can. That is all you can do. You can not save her life singlehandedly. But you ease the pain, and you are there for her.

That is a great achievment, and in your situation- an exeptional effort and sacrifice of your own wellbeing and your own life.
Nobody can ask anything more from you that you are already giving.

Bless you, and know that I have not forgotten about you, even if I do not post here as often. i carry you with me in my heart, and pray that you will succeed in reclaiming your life when all this is over.
 
Tomorrow at 9am, i will go to the hospital with my mom to hopefully schedule her surgery...
She has not been very well.Our Christmas and New year's eve,were to forget.

My mother was very tired and in pain.It seems that she has Reumatism and something else we will know whenwe know her blood tests results on the 20th of this month.

I just hope and pray this is not another joke.My mother is very anxious and tired,and i am getting so fed up of everything...
 
Wishing everything turns out well for you and your mother xxx
 
Just stopped by to see if there was an update on your Mom. Sorry, to hear that you still don't have answers. I know you are both tired and it's hard to keep going, but you got to, Maria. Your Mom is very lucky to have you, Please send her my love and best wishes. xxx
 
Thank you MysteriousPhoenix,Michelle MC,swirly,Dublinproud,LindaC781,and cass.Thank you so so much for your love and support.

Thank you toeverybody that has the patience to read this never endinging thread,that it seems like a never ending nightmare.

As i said yesterday,me and my mom went to the hospital to see if we would come up with answers.I didn't say anything till now because i was very tired emotionally,and i felt that it would be wise to wait till today,so i can say what happened with more calm.

There we went,with our hopes high,and again...
What happened was that the doctor said that my mother needed surgery,and that the risks of not survinving,are very very high.
As if this was not enough,if she survives,she will become more depedant on me than she is already,because any atempt to do anything to the brain aneurism,brings consequences.
What made me feel like wanting to shut up the doctor,was the fact that she was always saying that my mom might not survive the surgery.
We heard it the first time she said so.She dosen't have to say it all the time!

The doctor said that maybe it would be good to have a week to take care of what my mom thinks it's important to be done,and this is why she said that next wednesday,(jan 13th),she will call me to see if my mom can have her surgery on friday.(15th jan).
I have a terrible feeling about this,especially because january 15th is not a day i want to remember ever.
Soooo believing that this time it will be it,my mother might have only a week to live,and i have no idea how to deal with this,or what to do,because mummy dosen't feel like doing anything.

Part of me wants this surgery to happen because i refuse to believe that she has to be worst....but another part of me is terrified with all this.

Does anyone knows what should i do and how?
Never felt so lost,and so scared in my life.

Thank you all.
 
Hey Maria, I'm typing through my phone (no real Internet connection) so I can't really express my feelings right now. I am so sorry to hear about all of this. And I'm even more sorry to say that I don't know the answer to your last question. What ICANN say, however, is that you should feel neither guilt nor regret. Both of you have fought this honorbly, you did your best. It's not over maria, have hope, you have one last obsticle to conqur (which you will by the way). For what time you have left before the surgery, spend happy times with your mom, let these days be happy ones for both of you, happiness could go a long way. My prayers are with you Maria, we will do everything in our power to support you and your mom through this. Have faith! You are almost there!
 
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Mariajoaosilva said:
Thank you MysteriousPhoenix,Michelle MC,swirly,Dublinproud,LindaC781,and cass.Thank you so so much for your love and support.

Thank you toeverybody that has the patience to read this never endinging thread,that it seems like a never ending nightmare.

As i said yesterday,me and my mom went to the hospital to see if we would come up with answers.I didn't say anything till now because i was very tired emotionally,and i felt that it would be wise to wait till today,so i can say what happened with more calm.

There we went,with our hopes high,and again...
What happened was that the doctor said that my mother needed surgery,and that the risks of not survinving,are very very high.
As if this was not enough,if she survives,she will become more depedant on me than she is already,because any atempt to do anything to the brain aneurism,brings consequences.
What made me feel like wanting to shut up the doctor,was the fact that she was always saying that my mom might not survive the surgery.
We heard it the first time she said so.She dosen't have to say it all the time!

The doctor said that maybe it would be good to have a week to take care of what my mom thinks it's important to be done,and this is why she said that next wednesday,(jan 13th),she will call me to see if my mom can have her surgery on friday.(15th jan).
I have a terrible feeling about this,especially because january 15th is not a day i want to remember ever.
Soooo believing that this time it will be it,my mother might have only a week to live,and i have no idea how to deal with this,or what to do,because mummy dosen't feel like doing anything.

Part of me wants this surgery to happen because i refuse to believe that she has to be worst....but another part of me is terrified with all this.

Does anyone knows what should i do and how?
Never felt so lost,and so scared in my life.

Thank you all.
Click to expand...

Maria, I'm so sorry about your mother and all you two are going through. I will keep praying. I don't know what you should do, I don't have an answer either. Keep praying and trusting in God. Have you consulted a priest about this? I know you're Catholic, so I was just wondering if you had. I know you're scared,and please remember that I am praying for you and I will be here for you if you need to talk.
 
Latest news...

I found out earlier today,that my mother WILL HAVEHER SURGERY tomorrow,friday,jan 15th.

We have to be at the hospital at 10.30 am,and the surgery will probably be in the afternoon.

I am just terrified with all this.I can't imagine losing my mother.

I am so so scared that i don't know how i will sleep tonight,or how i will react if something goes wrong.

Please my dear friends,help me by praying for her with all your faith.Her name is Maria Elisa,and i am so scared...

Thank you so much for everything.
 
Thank you all so so much for your constant love and support.

I felt all the love while i was in the hospital,in such a strong way...

I just got back home from the hospital,and the news are not the best.
The doctor was not able to do the surgery,because her veins and artheries are so weak and tired,that any big effort from the doctror could have killed my mom imedialtly.
Docotor will ask an oppinion to a colegue she has in paris,to see what he thinks it can be done,knowing that if he advices the embolization,my mom have very high risks of dying.
Right now she is being watched,and those 24h are crucial.Hopefully,if she spends the night well,and dosen't bleed,she will be able to come home sometime tomorrow.But i can't say that for sure as my mom is very weak,very tired and was with pain,wich is not a good sign at all.
 
my prayers are with you maria, you have my full support.
 
...............((((((((((((((((Maria and Mom)))))))))))))))))))))))
 
Thank you Asis,Carol,and everybody.

I can't thank you enough really...


My mother came home today in the afternoon.
She was not able to sleep at all in hospital due to the position she had to be,and she was also very nervous as she gets very scared anytime she needs to go to the hospital.in a way she reminds of Michael with the sleeping problems because my mom always had troubles to sleep,no matter the medicins she would take,and in the hospital is the same.
I am waiting for a phone call of her doctor to see if this wednesday we have to return to the hospital or not.

Also,if she feels any kind of pain in the area where were the angiography was made,she has to return to the hospital imediatly.
Anyways,thank you all so much for all the love,support and prayers.
God Bless you.
 
Maria you know of course I have been praying for you constantly and your mom. I hope your mom has a rest while at home. Home is where you can truly lay your weary head. I shall keep praying and ask the Lord to keep watch over her.
 
Maria, i pray for you and your mom - so that the doctors decide best. It's good she can be at home, I think.
Hope she gets a nice and peaceful sleep this night.
 
Mariajoaosilva said:
Thank you Asis,Carol,and everybody.

I can't thank you enough really...


My mother came home today in the afternoon.
She was not able to sleep at all in hospital due to the position she had to be,and she was also very nervous as she gets very scared anytime she needs to go to the hospital.in a way she reminds of Michael with the sleeping problems because my mom always had troubles to sleep,no matter the medicins she would take,and in the hospital is the same.
I am waiting for a phone call of her doctor to see if this wednesday we have to return to the hospital or not.

Also,if she feels any kind of pain in the area where were the angiography was made,she has to return to the hospital imediatly.
Anyways,thank you all so much for all the love,support and prayers.
God Bless you.
Click to expand...

...............You are very welcome hun:yes::better:
Its good she is home now,I hope she can have some rest:yes::better:
 
It's amazing how time flies,even if we don't realise it,and often feel that it stoped.

Today i went with my mother to the hospital,and much to my suprise,the doctor told us,that she dosen't know yet,the answer that her co-worker in paris,will say.

She said that if she was able to talk to her coleague tomorrow,(thursday,28th),that she would call me or my mother after she knew something,and if it was late to call,that she would let us know friday.

She also said,that if she dosen't call at all,that would mean that she dosen't have the answershe is waiting for,so we will have to reach her,a week from today.(feb 3).

Something tells me that the doctor will not call,and that next week when we reach her,she will either say that she dosen't knows anything,or she and her coleague think it is better not to do anything,as it would be too dangerous.

With all this,of course my mother is feeling very down,very tired,and wanting to give up everything.
The problem is that i am feeling the exact same way,because my mom is sick for3 and half years now,and this constant doubt and anxiety,are not helping us.

Anyways my dear ones,When i know something for sure,i will let you know what will bedone.(or not)...

Thank you so so much for all the love,prayers,and support

God Bless You all,my dear friends!
 
Maria, I am continuing to pray for your mother and for you. May God strengthen the both of you during this difficult time.
 
Maria,

My thoughts & prayers are with u & Mom. :praying:
Please don't give up. :flowers:
 
.........................Gosh:no:Feel for you both:no::better:
(((((((((((((((warm hug)))))))))))))))))))))))))
 
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