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7 months without Michael

PCR said:
Well.... I don't mean to be rude at all, but is this thread meant to be a reminder of something everybody here knows so well? I don't think so, friend :no: I think this is just a way to let our hearts tell what they need. I understand that is the reason why this kind of threads are posted here, in this special section, which is our place to share our feelings about this pain. I think this is one of my favourite corners in this forum and I come here daily. I really do, for I need to escape from my reality and just focus on this pain, not to suffer more, but just to try to make some sense of it and start healing.

Several of us come here almost everyday. I know we feel some relieve here, just writing down our feelings, and sharing our ups and downs. This is not meant to hurt anybody :(

And there is also another reason for this: how many of us really have someone around to express this pain, someone we can openly talk about our pain and our love for Michael? During the first days and weeks, there were many. Sympathy was all around, but not anymore, at least not the way it used to be; Some have started to see MJ fans like "weird" fans again. Most people simply don't understand our pain and believe we have some kind of mental weakness (to say it in a nice way). So when there is nowhere to turn, we turn here. And we speak here and we hug and we support, for this is our place, our corner to do it, to cry, to remember. We need this so much.

Please don't get me wrong, my friend. I wouldn't like to start any kind of issues, not today, and I know you mean well. It's just that some of us act in a different way. Some might need this. Some others might not.

Big, big hugs :hug:
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I couldnt have agreed more:) very well said:yes:
 
7 months of saddness, I cannot get over it I miss him sooo much and I DONT WANT TO FORGET HIM!!!!!

Michael I love you!!!!!!!:angel::angel:.......please continue to check on us dear
 
7 months and it feels like yesterday, hurts like yesterday, he's missed like yesterday, there is a void like there was right after his passing, 7 months and -my life at least- is still shattered, 7 months and I still feel incomplete, I'm trying to pick up pieces of my soul and heart both broke when he passed, those pieces are missing forever and I'm unable to ''move on'' some are better, some are not and others don't care. I just wish he was here. Not to sing and dance for me, but to live his life and be with his children. I'm a changed person who's hoping to meet him soon finally.
 
BunnyHead said:
7 months of saddness, I cannot get over it I miss him sooo much and I DONT WANT TO FORGET HIM!!!!!

Michael I love you!!!!!!!:angel::angel:.......please continue to check on us dear
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Seven months on feels like 1 minute on....the pain is still raw for me.

Last year (personally) was a testing year for me and my husband - we went through my sister being diagnosed with breast cancer (she was given the all clear after a mastectomy), my brother-in-law dying of cancer, 8 break ins to our property, both of us facing (and beating!) redundancy....

My loss of Michael just soared above....since that night on June 25th I've rarely had a sound nights' sleep, I've put on weight through comfort eating, I cry every night when I think of him, and I no longer am as sociable as I once was - I rarely visit friends...mainly spending evenings and weekends at home.

Every so often I have a feeling where it flashes to me that it's just my imagination playing tricks with me, and Michael isn't gone - then just as quickly, reality kicks in and reminds me. Today I booked June 25th this year off work - I cannot be in the office on that day. I had to go to work on June 26th as the news was breaking - everyone in my office was talking about him, and the plasma screens on the walls in the office were showing BBC News 24 non-stop....all I wanted to do was run away and cry. I'm NOT going through that again.........

I miss Michael - he's been a part of my life for 27 years - he HAS to be there for the rest of my days....
 
This was all I kept thinking about at work today. Seven months since that day. They say time is a healer and I am in a better place since June but the pain will never go away. I still miss him so much. Saturday was amazing spending it with MJ fans. Things are getting back to normal and when I am with fans I am truly myself. One thing I do know is without you guys I would not be in the place I am now. You guys have given me the strength and support and for that I am so thankful.

I miss you Mike more than words can ever describe.
 
Hugs to you all.
There is lots of love for Michael in the world.
I hope you will join the majorloveprayer today/tonight.
 
:hug: everybody!

Michael is really not that far away, he's in all our hearts :yes:
I don't think any one of us has to be afraid of forgetting him or not having him in our lives, because he's not going anywhere...

It's the power of L.:heart:.V.E.
 
^^I'm actually tired of hearing that sentence from my friends.. he's not gone, he's in your heart! but you know.. it's just simply not enough :cry: *cries*
 
stineLOVESmichael said:
^^I'm actually tired of hearing that sentence from my friends.. he's not gone, he's in your heart! but you know.. it's just simply not enough :cry: *cries*
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That is just as true as the words of that sentense. Words loose their meaning at some point when it comes to this. Maybe we don't cry for him. We know he's in a better place (which might depend on own beliefs). Maybe we cry for the ones left behind, his kids, his mother and yes, us, the ones who were dreaming of him. I should have been just one and a half week from leaving to London to manage to see him again and now... I don't even know what to do for this upcoming Summer vacations :(
 
PCR said:
That is just as true as the words of that sentense. Words loose their meaning at some point when it comes to this. Maybe we don't cry for him. We know he's in a better place (which might depend on own beliefs). Maybe we cry for the ones left behind, his kids, his mother and yes, us, the ones who were dreaming of him. I should have been just one and a half week from leaving to London to manage to see him again and now... I don't even know what to do for this upcoming Summer vacations :(
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yes exactly!!! I do believe he's in a better place because let's face it.. anywhere must be better than earth.. so much cruelty here it makes me :cry:...
For those who's left behind.. who will no longer get to hold him.. kiss him. look him in the eyes..see him dance..see him SMILE.. hold him THIGHT...
for those who's never done these things and wont ever get to do that now.. (like me :cry: )...
all his friends..kids..family..FANS..UUUS.. awh michael..come back
I know it sounds selfish but..AWH he's my HERO!! he's my everything..how can I cope without him..I don't know
 
stineLOVESmichael said:
^^I'm actually tired of hearing that sentence from my friends.. he's not gone, he's in your heart! but you know.. it's just simply not enough :cry: *cries*
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Well, sorry, I wish we could have more... :mello:
If I have a good day, I think it's wonderful and comforting. And if I have a bad day, I think "what the h**l, he has been a part of my heart for years, and now that's all there is...and that's supposed to be enough?"
But what can I say. Life's so hard sometimes. It was for him many, many times. And it is for us now and will be a long time. I guess everyone has to try to find things that can help even if just a little bit.. :mello: At least we have each other here..
 
God it still hurts like hell:cry:
and what hurts the most is the person responsible for this is still not in jail!
I never thought that after 7 months we'd be still waiting for justice:no:
 
januska said:
Well, sorry, I wish we could have more... :mello:
If I have a good day, I think it's wonderful and comforting. And if I have a bad day, I think "what the h**l, he has been a part of my heart for years, and now that's all there is...and that's supposed to be enough?"
But what can I say. Life's so hard sometimes. It was for him many, many times. And it is for us now and will be a long time. I guess everyone has to try to find things that can help even if just a little bit.. :mello: At least we have each other here..
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YOu are right :)
Your words were not wrong at all, dear, how could they be wrong when they are so, so true? It's just that we would like to feel different or to find more relieve on those and in other words. But wrong? not at all!! In fact, i think that is the only thing that makes this nightmare a bit more bereable. I am glad I have my faith, but still it doesn't erase all the pain, especially in days like this. As you say, the good thing is we are together in this. We just try to be helpful and support each other, but no doubt, we all fee so differently. I am sure many of us are so angry and upset at this very moment. While others just want to cry or feel too weak to even post a comment. Many can't listen to MJ's songs anymore, while other keep listening to him 24/7.

We are a universe and there as many right ways as griving fans. Yet, we are together in this and that makes things better, way better :hug:

Thank you so much!!
 
Today there's been exactly 7 months which clearly shows that time does not heal, not in this case. How can my soul heal when it feels like a part of it has died? I feel incredibly sad, alone, and heartbroken. Can't even find words strong enough to convey my sadness :weeping: all I can do is sob it's so hard. It hurts so bad. Everyday that he hasn't been here, a part of me hurts. That's just honesty. I loved Michael since I was a little girl (I'm 27 now), he was my first crush, love and I still love him and adore him. He is a part of my life, and I can't live without him. I still cry all the time. And I don't know what else to do with these emotions inside of me that are making my heart ache and bleed. I didn't know it could hurt so much... I miss him like crazy. And I still so badly wish it was me instead of him that had died.
 
PCR said:
And there is also another reason for this: how many of us really have someone around to express this pain, someone we can openly talk about our pain and our love for Michael? During the first days and weeks, there were many. Sympathy was all around, but not anymore, at least not the way it used to be; Some have started to see MJ fans like "weird" fans again. Most people simply don't understand our pain and believe we have some kind of mental weakness (to say it in a nice way). So when there is nowhere to turn, we turn here. And we speak here and we hug and we support, for this is our place, our corner to do it, to cry, to remember. We need this so much.
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Thank you. I didn't get a lot of understanding 7 months ago, and if folks knew how much I am still affected, they would do an intervention.

The month counts are indeed good for some. For others, not. That's the beauty of this board, you can find a personal "corner" filled with many who feel the same as you do.
 
feels so weird without Michael :boohoo:
i couldnt believe it today when i heard Bad on the bus this afternoon, like michaels songs are rarely ever on the local radio station.. but today of all days... 7months since.... :(
its going so fast... :'( i miss him more each day.
 
7 months and still feels like yesterday. My heart still aches, my eyes still cry, my soul still hurts. :cry: I feel lost, lost without him, lost without Michael. Sometimes I wish the world could just stop spinning forever so I shouldn't have to feel this pain. Today I woke up but why? To do what? The only places where I want to be are on the forum and inside my dreams, where I can be with Michael and nobody has to ask me why I want to be with him.
I just hope, Michael, where ever you are right now, that you're having a happy time. I send you all my love that I can possibly give you. I love you with all my heart and I miss you.
I also wanted to say to all the fans that if it haden't be for you all, I wouldn't be in this world anymore. You're my major support. Thank you and I send a hug to every single one of you.
God bless you. :angel:
 
Tin Angel said:
7 months and still feels like yesterday. My heart still aches, my eyes still cry, my soul still hurts. :cry: I feel lost, lost without him, lost without Michael. Sometimes I wish the world could just stop spinning forever so I shouldn't have to feel this pain. Today I woke up but why? To do what? The only places where I want to be are on the forum and inside my dreams, where I can be with Michael and nobody has to ask me why I want to be with him.
I just hope, Michael, where ever you are right now, that you're having a happy time. I send you all my love that I can possibly give you. I love you with all my heart and I miss you.
I also wanted to say to all the fans that if it haden't be for you all, I wouldn't be in this world anymore. You're my major support. Thank you and I send a hug to every single one of you.
God bless you. :angel:
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Amiga :hug: yes... a strange day indeed, but al least we can come here to shed our tears. You must stay here, dear, we need you here too. Maybe we are way stronger then we think.

Gracias por haberme ayudado y comprendido también, amiga. Un gran abrazo para ti y mucha, mucha fuerza.

:)
 
7 months without Micheal and every damn one of them have been hell....its the not knowing ..its the what and the who is responsible...its the unanswered questions....Michael deserved so much better than this..:cry:
 
*I've got my candle and will be holding 2 mins silence at 10:25pm GMT :cry: :weeping:
 
Aw, I can't stop crying. I still feel so lost and empty. When Michael died a huge part of me died with him. So I am never going to feel the same way again. Sometimes I still do wish that maybe I should have commited suicide. Like I had promise myself that I would if anything horrible should ever happen to Michael. I can't believe how hard it still is to live in a world without him in it. I don't really know how to cope. :weeping:
 
:angel: I can't put into words right now how I feel I'd have to give it serious thought... :cry:
 
*Billie Jean* said:
Aw, I can't stop crying. I still feel so lost and empty. When Michael died a huge part of me died with him. So I am never going to feel the same way again. Sometimes I still do wish that maybe I should have commited suicide. Like I had promise myself that I would if anything horrible should ever happen to Michael. I can't believe how hard it still is to live in a world without him in it. I don't really know how to cope. :weeping:
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OMG please don't talk like that, sweetie! Michael would never want to see his fans hurting themselves because of him. Give it some time and things will be better.
Stay strong and keep the faith! *big hugs*
 
7 Months. Oh my.

It still stings...a lot. But I'm accepting it and I feel a lot better now than I have been the past few '25th's.' I feel Michael everywhere and I believe he still with us in many ways. If we continue to mourn him, then he can't live on like he should. He's still alive through his music and his beautiful spirit. The L.O.V.E. will always be there. :heart:
 
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