Poop in the bucket, she said.
No, he replied. I cannot poop in the bucket. The bucket holds purity and my poop is not pure.
But your poop is your poop, she replied gently. It is pure if you are pure and make it so.
Nevermind your fairy tales, sweety! We are men, our poop is not pure. It smells fowl and if you eat only your poop you will die. How is it pure?
How dare you! Eating poop is what I have done all my life. I am still alive!!!
How are you still alive if you have eaten poop your entire life?!
Poop in the bucket, I say!!!
Answer my question!
No!!! Poop, it's pure! It's pure! Poop in the bucket and I will eat it and show you myself.
No, that is disgusting! I told you, I explained, it's not pure. No it is not. You will stop eating poop this instant! You hear me?! I have kissed you all these years with poop mouth?!? Disgusting! Poop mouth!? Agh!!!!
Poop is pure and good for the tummy. It contains all the minerals that your body conveniently sorts out of your food and you eat it to get the nutrients. You didn't know that? Poop is vitamins. Poop is pure!
This is not true! No, this is crazy talk! This is not true! Poop isn't pure! All my life I've been taught that poop is bad for you, you will die. What you are saying is ludicrous, I cannot believe it!
Poop in the bucket and I will show you, she replied firmly.
... OK. I will do it. I want this to be over. After this, I will have to reconsider our relationship.
Good. Poop.
[Poop is excreted into the bucket.]
This is a soft stool, like pudding! She giggled joyously.
Okay? He replied confused. You're really going to eat it? Eww, it's watery!
I will eat a little, you can eat the rest with me! She said.
Me?! Eat my own poop!?
Yes, the nutrients! Think of how malnourished you are. Eat the poop.
[The poop is nibbled.]
Aw, it tastes like crap!
Vitamins always taste like poop because they are the dried out poops of small woodland creatures.
I see... This all makes so much sense to me now. It's very clear. I think the poop has opened up my eyes.
She smiles, Poop has a way of opening people's eyes. The stench alone will do that.
Indeed.
How delicious.
This is exactly what I was not trying to say all along! I'm glad you understand what happens when you always remember to forget what you were trying to forget to remember.
