PaceMioDolceCuore
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Re: Paris Jackson Possible Suicide Attempt Rushed to Hospital SHE IS OK
Yes and no. There's a reason we have hormones surging through us. There is also a reason why hospitals have come a long way in acknowledging human bonding behavior and the impact a traumatic birth can have on the bonding between parent and child. And some people have very strong maternal instincts, innate, before they even become a parent.
I have to say that I was already maternal (I am a cancer...we all need to be mothered sometimes and sometimes we need to pay it forward), but I do recall the surge of hormones kicking once my little one was born. Better not tick post-partum Mama Bear off! I also find that you often can read in the way some people write if they have children. Granted, not always - but at times.
I would agree however that giving birth in and of itself does not make a GOOD parent, however one defines that.
But often is does happen that even the most non-maternal people suddenly discover what it means to have a child. And others are relatively removed from their children, emotionally etc. Predictions are hard to make.
Midwifes and sleep doctors know of the symbiotic relationships of parent and child. And yes, biology does play a role at times - but a cold person will more likely stay cold. Ask any sleep doctor about his knowledge of sleep habits when it comes to parents! Other languages even have words designating the sleep patterns of a nursing woman - "Ammenschlaf." While a wet nurse might not have given birth to a specific infant, "Ammenschlaf" refers to the way a nursing woman/mother will wake up 15 seconds before her baby wakes up for nursing session no.879476498567. Oh boy, parenthood...
That's of course a total off topic sideways excursion here but research indicates that biology does play a huge part in our relationships.
Michael clearly parented his children in a very attached manner, reading Frank Cascios book was quite interesting in that regard because he didn't try to sell the story of 'the children never cried' that some conveyed. Paris was decribed as quite colicky, meaning Michael chose to do what many of us parents do. Let the child sleep with you by your side and don't worry about naysayers. I had an extremely colicky baby and it turns out that certain sensory integration issues are there.
It bothers me when some single dude at TMZ describes Paris as the 'high maintenance' one - my son is 'high maintenance', some children are highly sensitive in the way the process the impressions of the world. My son has certain sensory processing issues, so I am already on alert to watch him later on for depression and the like. It can be very difficult to tune into a child when an adult has not spent the years with that child the way Michael has. That of course doesn't mean that there are no people in this world capable of taking care of Michael's children - but there is a clear advantage that a parent has. They have known their child from day one, they know their child's strength and limits better than anyone else.
Highly sensitive people often have a rather rough start in life, from being colicky to adolescence from hell. And it very well be that Paris has natural predispositions in the way she processes stress, etc. My son has a number of sensory integration issues etc. so I am used to tuning into him in an almost telepathic way.
The only thing that makes me breathe easier about this entire situation now is that Paris does have access to the best in the field - and sometimes you do not get that access until it is understood that help is urgently needed. She can be checked out from head to toe with Doctors taking a very detailed look. There are a number of issues that sometimes don't pop up until later - but when they do, they do so with a vengeance.
Hopefully this will not only give her an opportunity to rest and turn that thought carrousel off for a little bit (the relief of just a little bit of Ativan where appropriate can be immense for those who are in pain)- but it's also a chance see if there are other underlying issues (even of medical nature) that need to be addressed. Depression is so often a symptom of other conditions as well, the trauma of Michael's absence might have accelerated that even. My antennas kind of zoomed out a little when I read Cascio's book.
Giving birth doesn't make a person maternal, they are either that way or not.
Yes and no. There's a reason we have hormones surging through us. There is also a reason why hospitals have come a long way in acknowledging human bonding behavior and the impact a traumatic birth can have on the bonding between parent and child. And some people have very strong maternal instincts, innate, before they even become a parent.
I have to say that I was already maternal (I am a cancer...we all need to be mothered sometimes and sometimes we need to pay it forward), but I do recall the surge of hormones kicking once my little one was born. Better not tick post-partum Mama Bear off! I also find that you often can read in the way some people write if they have children. Granted, not always - but at times.
I would agree however that giving birth in and of itself does not make a GOOD parent, however one defines that.
But often is does happen that even the most non-maternal people suddenly discover what it means to have a child. And others are relatively removed from their children, emotionally etc. Predictions are hard to make.
Midwifes and sleep doctors know of the symbiotic relationships of parent and child. And yes, biology does play a role at times - but a cold person will more likely stay cold. Ask any sleep doctor about his knowledge of sleep habits when it comes to parents! Other languages even have words designating the sleep patterns of a nursing woman - "Ammenschlaf." While a wet nurse might not have given birth to a specific infant, "Ammenschlaf" refers to the way a nursing woman/mother will wake up 15 seconds before her baby wakes up for nursing session no.879476498567. Oh boy, parenthood...
That's of course a total off topic sideways excursion here but research indicates that biology does play a huge part in our relationships.
Michael clearly parented his children in a very attached manner, reading Frank Cascios book was quite interesting in that regard because he didn't try to sell the story of 'the children never cried' that some conveyed. Paris was decribed as quite colicky, meaning Michael chose to do what many of us parents do. Let the child sleep with you by your side and don't worry about naysayers. I had an extremely colicky baby and it turns out that certain sensory integration issues are there.
It bothers me when some single dude at TMZ describes Paris as the 'high maintenance' one - my son is 'high maintenance', some children are highly sensitive in the way the process the impressions of the world. My son has certain sensory processing issues, so I am already on alert to watch him later on for depression and the like. It can be very difficult to tune into a child when an adult has not spent the years with that child the way Michael has. That of course doesn't mean that there are no people in this world capable of taking care of Michael's children - but there is a clear advantage that a parent has. They have known their child from day one, they know their child's strength and limits better than anyone else.
Highly sensitive people often have a rather rough start in life, from being colicky to adolescence from hell. And it very well be that Paris has natural predispositions in the way she processes stress, etc. My son has a number of sensory integration issues etc. so I am used to tuning into him in an almost telepathic way.
The only thing that makes me breathe easier about this entire situation now is that Paris does have access to the best in the field - and sometimes you do not get that access until it is understood that help is urgently needed. She can be checked out from head to toe with Doctors taking a very detailed look. There are a number of issues that sometimes don't pop up until later - but when they do, they do so with a vengeance.
Hopefully this will not only give her an opportunity to rest and turn that thought carrousel off for a little bit (the relief of just a little bit of Ativan where appropriate can be immense for those who are in pain)- but it's also a chance see if there are other underlying issues (even of medical nature) that need to be addressed. Depression is so often a symptom of other conditions as well, the trauma of Michael's absence might have accelerated that even. My antennas kind of zoomed out a little when I read Cascio's book.