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My dad is in the hospital again, last night he had surgery.

Oh, I am so terribly sorry to read this. I was afraid things were not going well. There are no words to make the hurt any less or to take away the pain. Only time can do that. Understanding why something like this happens is impossible but as you rightly say, he is beyond pain and suffering now. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. God Bless.
 
I'm really sorry, Staffordshire... I'd be crushed as well...

Don't know what to say in these fresh moments except to send out heartfelt condolences to you and your family, and may God give you strength during these difficult times. ... May your father's soul finally be in peace... At least he's free from all the pain and fears he underwent here on earth, and, although, that's may not reduce the pain at the moment, I know it will in time... Think that he is appreciating it deeply that you were all there for and with him until the end, and that he is in a better place right now...

*hugs*...
 
I´m sorry your father couldn´t make it.
 
I'm just very glad to have a family, who's very supportive, we'll always be there for eachother. Me and my brother never had a big loss before, well...only pets and that's horrible too but doesn't compare to someone like my dad. And our first loss had to be this one...jesus.

I do see now that life can go fast, life can do strange things...so it's best to make the best of things while you are alive.
It doesn't matter if you smoke or not, or drink or not...nothing is certain in life except for that one day your gonna go someplace else. He lived a very healthy life except for the anti-depressants, but without those...his life would have been hell. At the end of the day...he appeared to have very weak body parts like his arteries and his high blood pressure, and if he had survived it, no doubt he would have suffered more infarcts and what not...that's something i dont wish on anyone.
But apparently this is genetic and me and my bro could suffer from it at later age...so we best have some checks done on ourselves sometime in the near future.

If i had been all alone in this, no family..no friends, nothing, i believe there's a chance i might have decided to go up there as well. I wasn't an incredibly happy person anyway before all this, i just lived my life and that was that. I was happy as hell that my dad was feeling better after starting with anti-depressants again, but when january happened...i just....horrible. But i can understand very well if people would decide at times like these to just end it all, but i won't...i got great family and friends (from a big distance..but great friends nonetheless).

Sure i would have wanted him to live on. but not like this..not with this pain,uncertainty and a life full of risks. At the end of the day we gotta ask ourselves....are we now being selfish? Cause there's a limit for everyone...enough is enough, and there;s just so much a person can take. In due time i will only cherish the many happy thoughts and probably not his last few days....i truly believe he wasn't conscious anymore after his last brain infarct and don't think he suffered anymore.
 
I'm sorry to read this. May your dad rest in peace. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Hopefully the funeral will be respectfull and meaningfull. I will be thinking of you for a moment tomorrow. And don't forget you have a 2nd family here if you need to talk about something or vent your emotions.

Gecondoleerd en heel veel sterkte!
 
Thanks people, i have no idea what i should feel about tomorrow. People tell me tomorrow is the real goodbye, but i don't see it like that. I will never really say goodbye to my dad, i will always keep him in my memories, in every decision in life i make, i will keep him in mind, cause he learned me so much about life. And Michael's Gone too soon is just perfect for tomorrow, it describes my dad perfectly, he was very intelligent and he definitely went way too soon, age 61 is just way too young. And he apreciated Michael as a person too, and loved his music as well. He might not have been a hardcore fan of him like i am, but that doesn't matter. i DID go to the HIStory tour with him when i was very young and i will always cherish that memory, that day was just beautiful.

One thing is for sure....my father is at the same place as Michael. The place where only beautiful souls go to.
 
In the Next Room

Death is nothing at all
I have only slipped away into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other
That we are still
Call me by my old familiar name
Speak to me in the easy way you always used
Put no difference into your tone
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed
At the little jokes we always enjoyed together
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was
Let it be spoken without effort
Without the ghost of a shadow in it
Life means all that it ever meant

It is the same as it ever was
There is absolute unbroken continuity
What is death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind
Because I am out of sight?

I am waiting for you for an interval
Somewhere very near
Just around the corner
All is well.

Nothing is past; nothing is lost
One brief moment and all will be as it was before
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!
Canon Henry Scott-Holland, 1847-1918, Canon of St Paul's Cathedral

This poem as always brought me some comfort when I needed it. Perhaps it will for you also.
((((hugs))))
 
That poem is beautiful and i wish i could see it like that right now, look at death that way, but i can't right now. I'm gonna try to prepare for tomorrow, i have no feelings or whatsoever..it's still so surreal and i can't really understand everything. I mean...the good man passed away on tuesday and right there on that same day we had to arrange things for the funeral, things like choosing in what kind of chest we wanted him in, what kind of things we wanted during the funeral, all of that, so much to take in...so much happened...jesus.

I think in due time..that poem will definitely be of some help to me though.
 
[FONT=&quot]:(:( Oh noo... I'm so sorry to hear this... [/FONT][FONT=&quot]:weeping:
My condolences to you and your family. Sending you lots of love and strength... [/FONT][FONT=&quot]:huggy:
That's beautiful that you will have Gone To Soon played for him at the funeral...
I'm sure you have two angels now that are watching over you... [/FONT][FONT=&quot]:heart:

wiccanlosswithredrose.jpg


Heel veel sterkte voor morgen en de komende tijd voor jou en je familie... :huggy:
[/FONT]
 
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Dear Thijs,

I never followed this thread, but I do feel your pain, I don't know you personally, but I just want to say we are here for you.
I don't know if you believe in the Holy story of Christ and his Father (Michael did), but maybe this will help:

Hallelujah to the one
He who raised a beautiful son
He let your father to be at His place
Forever and ever he's in his grace.


Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah

A message from my girlfriend, who also want to support you..



I'm so sorry to hear about what happened.. *tears* So sorry for your
loss..
..My deepest condolences to you and your family..
Life doesn't seem fair sometimes. Your father was one of the good guys.
And seemingly God needed him there to be one of his angels..
Your dad is finally in peace now..
I said a prayer while I was in the bus going to work, for you all..
The Lord is with you all today and the coming period giving you
strength, peace and comfort...
God sees and knows everything and is with you right now. He will take
care of all his children..

"Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have
told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a
place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that
where I am, there ye may be also."

John 14:1-3


Love and Peace,
LiLShOrTaY
 
I am kinda lost for words about your dad passing away Thijs...i didnt follow this topic because i am hardly online on mjjc these days but i read it today because Diana pm'ed me, my heart goes out to you and everyone else that was close to your dad...

A friend of mine once wrote something along this line, it is very helpful for me at times (since he passed away as well):

Life here is too short, but we are immortal.. this is not the end of the line for us, don't feel helpless when this is only one step along our way, you and your dad are forever companions, don't forget that.
 
Same goes for me Thijs, I just read the whole thread and I'm really sorry for your loss.
Ik wens jou en je familie heel veel sterkte!
 
Thanks for all the support people, i really really apreciate it. But how do you guys know my real name, i noticed that :).

Today was a very heavy and rough day, it was beautiful but also so sad and at the end of the day, i rather never had this day happening, what happened to that good man...i just can't find the words for it. In my speech i thanked him, i told him what an amazing person he was and my memories of him and me going to MJ's show, and then i basically anounced Gone too soon, in that sense it was beautiful but heartbreaking too. My brother had an amazing speech too, and my mother as well. She spoke to my father as if she was Jack (his dog) talking to his owner, to his friend, amazing really.

I also heard something today that makes me feel more at ease and at peace with how everything eventually turned out. The final results from the doctor were in and apparently my dad has suffered 6 infarcts in total and if he had survived the last one, he was gonna be 100% paralyzed. And maybe even completely blind, since his left eye wasn't working anymore...well....if i don't wish anything on that sweet man, it's exactly that. So in that sense...with that in mind, i am relieved for him.
 
I am so terribly sorry for your loss...it is so hard when we lose somone that we love...your pain is great right now...in time it will be less. I would tell myself he is not suffering anymore...as I see that you have already told your so. You were a very good son that is obvious by your love for your father ..and he KNOWS how much you loved him...he loved you as well. You will feel numb for awhile..not really knowing how to feel or what to feel. But you will be ok in time. I will pray for you, :hug:
 
Staffordshire Bullterrier said:
Thanks for all the support people, i really really apreciate it. But how do you guys know my real name, i noticed that :).

Today was a very heavy and rough day, it was beautiful but also so sad and at the end of the day, i rather never had this day happening, what happened to that good man...i just can't find the words for it. In my speech i thanked him, i told him what an amazing person he was and my memories of him and me going to MJ's show, and then i basically anounced Gone too soon, in that sense it was beautiful but heartbreaking too. My brother had an amazing speech too, and my mother as well. She spoke to my father as if she was Jack (his dog) talking to his owner, to his friend, amazing really.

I also heard something today that makes me feel more at ease and at peace with how everything eventually turned out. The final results from the doctor were in and apparently my dad has suffered 6 infarcts in total and if he had survived the last one, he was gonna be 100% paralyzed. And maybe even completely blind, since his left eye wasn't working anymore...well....if i don't wish anything on that sweet man, it's exactly that. So in that sense...with that in mind, i am relieved for him.
Click to expand...

You told us some time ago in The Dutch Fans thread here on MJJC :)
I can imagine you feel relieved that he hasn't got to live that way, it wouldn't be living anymore. But it's still very hard to be without your father no doubt.
 
Yeah, right now everything is just darkness and emptyness. I can't see the beauty of anything in life right now, i already wasn't incredibly happy before all this, but right now it's just...sigh, i don't know. Just glad to have a lot of support from family and friends who i'll be visiting in may. Life for my dad as it was gonna be, if he had survived it, that's nothing, that's hell. But at the same time it's so horrible without him, the thought of that i can never ever just give him a call out of the blue, visit him, etc...is just so painful. Gonna take a long time before i can adjust to that, and accept it.
 
Angela_MJJ said:
You told us some time ago in The Dutch Fans thread here on MJJC :)
I can imagine you feel relieved that he hasn't got to live that way, it wouldn't be living anymore. But it's still very hard to be without your father no doubt.
Click to expand...


Ah right, i remember that. That was last year, when we were all went to celebrate MJ in Holland on his birthday. It's so strange to look at my MSN list now, my father is on there too and he put in the subtext "Walking around in a normal pace is still alittle hard, but i have nothing to complain" , this was all from after january when he had recovered from the first time...sigh. It's rather confronting to read that...but that's the way it is. I bet it's gonna take a long time before i can really accept it, and really start to enjoy things and see the beauty of things again in life.
 
I'm so sorry for your loss... :( I know it's hard, but try to stay strong... :huggy:
If you want me to I can light a candle for you and your dad the next time I'm in Best? I go there about once a month. Just let me know...
Take care! Sending love & strength your way... :give_heart: :huggy:
Diana xx
 
Hocus said:
I'm so sorry for your loss... :( I know it's hard, but try to stay strong... :huggy:
If you want me to I can light a candle for you and your dad the next time I'm in Best? I go there about once a month. Just let me know...
Take care! Sending love & strength your way... :give_heart: :huggy:
Diana xx
Click to expand...


Wow, that would be incredible. Thank you!!!!!!

You know what's so strange and sad..my dad was a huge audio fan and had lots and lots of expensive audio devices like speakers and amplifiers and me and my bro are getting alot of that for our own homes, but right now...i don't even want it, i just can't yet. It's his stuff....sigh, i am certainly never ever gonna sell anything from it cause i would be betraying him, that's how i feel. But months before all this happened, he let me and my bro know we'd be getting all of that, so i know he wants us too, and i definitely will, in due time.
 
................I'm very soryy for your'e loss:no::(
My deep condolence:yes:
 
Your dad was lucky to have such a loving son and family. ... I'm sure he's appreciating this so much and always will.
 
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