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Its been a min but i have a problem!

He was the bomb back in the day! I only just started listening to him again properly since June :O Brenda's Got A Baby came on this morning walking to work and I was almost choking up man! Also Wonda Why They Call U Bytch, Changes & I Ain't Mad At Cha came on (that brought Michael to the front of my mind though :( ).
 
@ jackie yes i meant what makes a man good looking. And @ thrillerchild i aint mad at cha makes do the same thing :)
 
shaugnie said:
Hi. I cry all the time when im at home. Most of the time i dont even know why. My family find it hard dealing with the fact i really cant controll my emotions.

Your son is the cutest kid ive ever seen. You should live your life as best you can to try and make his wonderful! And i must say you must be crazy! Your GORGOUS! haha :D
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i totally agree with the above,
 
at thriller child i so wished that had happen. omg at the possibility. you think they ever met. did mike even know who he was
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
at thriller child i so wished that had happen. omg at the possibility. you think they ever met. did mike even know who he was
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I've only ever heard 'pac mention him once in an interview from his Thug Life days (you know the loose mouth phase ;) ) in a rant about people having to many rooms or so many houses. He must've knew who he was if Mike worked with Biggie on This Time Around. I've searched high and lo for pics of them together but none at all :( I'd love to have heard Michael song the chorus of Until The End Of Time or Never Call You Bytch Again :( I don't think they would've met when he recorded Letter 2 My Unborn because that, as far as I'm aware, was mixed in its current form after tupac passed. But who knows :(
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
@ jackie yes i meant what makes a man good looking. And @ thrillerchild i aint mad at cha makes do the same thing :)
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erm... this is so hard to answer lol, to be honest looks don't really do a lot for me anymore, its so much more about personality and character, for instance I just want someone who knows what is going on in the world, not caught up in the media, gives a damm, and fit and healthy so they can keep up with me, oh yeah and they must be positive and fun :)

but i think most people are ok looking really. just keep yourself in good shape and smile then you will look good for sure :)

MAKAVELIDAKING said:
My birthday is comeing up real soon. I'll be 19 on may six
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awww 19 how cute, sorry lol, i'm 21 haha, happy birthday for may 6th :D

have a great day!!!

do you know what your getting??

xxxxxxxxx
 
Hey Ardain. Only just looked at your pics and gotta say you look a little like Ma$e ;)

How you today G?
 
@ jackie thanks hun for the early wishes and idk what ill be getting. So something good maybe.

@ thrillerchild i look nothing like mase but i have heard that before so your not the only one. I look better lol :). And today i'm feeling ok just tried
 
glad to hear from you and glad things are going ok. Take care hun and get some rest!
 
no not yet i'm going to school for psychology but i really want to get in to music and my parents dont want that but i really dont give a fuck. not to be blunt but hey its my life
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
no not yet i'm going to school for psychology but i really want to get in to music and my parents dont want that but i really dont give a fuck. not to be blunt but hey its my life
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aww kool, i wanna get into music as well. I',m teaching myself to play the guitar and ive done a bit of studying on music theory and composition

What are you gonna do about your music? could you study/learn both psychology and music?
 
To be truthful i always wanted to rap and get out be famous. Not to sound conceited are naive but i always believed i'd be known out there. And once i make it under the grace of god. U know i'm shouting out mjj community where ever lmfao. I can also sing as well. Pure voice no autotune. I just wished i had connects.
 
You could go on MySpace? At least then you can record some stuff and then pitch yourself to record companies etc?
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
Hey my fellow mjj friends and comrads. I know its been a while. I'm famous for having the tupac avatar. I'm having a little crisis and only you guys at mjj board can really help me.i'm really stuck i know i have my son to live for but on the inside i just dont feel to happy with myself. Idk why but i just am. I'm not suciadal or anything i was when i was younger but in this point in my life. I feel like i'm only living for him. And what makes matters worse i feel so alone when i'm at home. I barley talk to anyone. I mean my lil sister and i uses to be really tight but she never comes to me any more to talk that really hurts cuz i bend back and fourth to be there for her. I even come between my parents when they discipline her just to defend her and i would end up getting punished because of it. She's only one year younger then me . Shes a senior in high school and i'm a freshman in college. Ever since i went to college she never holla at me like that. That really hurts. I mean i give her gifts all the time and i get nothing nor do i ask but damm could get something i mean at least once but hey i'm not complaining :). My lil bro he looks up to me alot but we cant really communicate like that yet. He's only twelve he wont beable to understand what go through yet. Then last but not least is my older sister ardine she is 21. But shes only older in age. In mind set and maturity along with street and books smarts i'm older then her. Not being crude just being real. So in that sense i'm the oldest child. I have more responsibility plus i'm a dad and i have a kid of my own. I am a father,son, and big brother to my family. With al that being said i have more stress my father has a doctorate in education and my mother has a masters degree in social working its hard to live up like that. I'm named after my father ardain. Thats my real name ardain. And my whole school career up until college i always have to look up to his standards. My father reputation was big with my teachers and it always put ia hold on me. My mother is my only true friend we have our ups and downs but for the most part we love each other dearly. Dam i love that women. But lately shes been sick and its hard on me. But since i'm the "oldest" i have to be strong. Damn i just want this pain to go away for me. All theses problem i have but the biggest one for me is i think i'm so ugly. I have low real low self -esteem. No matter what folks say i think i'm ugly. When i was younger i was real fat and chubby and the kids would crucify me severely. I hated myself so bad. But as i got older i got into sports and played football,soccer, and basketball.as a result i lost all my weight and stayed up. The women took note of that. But i never felt it. I still viewed myself as ugly and i still do to this day. My son is so cute but sometimes i wonder how a man so ugly can create such beauty. To sum its all up my problems are poor self-image, lack of appreciation cause feel with every thing i do at home no one appreciates me especially my lil sis for all the good i've done 4 her, not meeting up to my parents standards of excellence, and not being able to look in the mirror.i'm done for now give me some advice i really need it muah hugs and kisses
love,
ardain :)
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First of I will like to say welcome back and you are fine and ya lil man is so cute. Real Talk you need to have a deep conversation with God tell him what you are going through every day as you live. At times I wonder why people are bless to have children even if they are not with anyone and have kids to care after is because they are our strengths just like you was your mother strength your son is yours there is a reason why you are here on this earth to care after him. I lost my mother when I was six years old to cancer one of the painful experience I dealt with people tell me I was to young to remember I tell them how can I forget a woman who been in my life sense birth I remember everything about my mother she will always talk to me and tell me even thro I might not be here long you know mommy will always be by your side she told my sisters to care after me and they did a good job too. Some times you have to understand tomorrow isn’t promise to any of us but today is . Here is a open prayer for you that I wrote and I am saying it out loud so that god can hear your pain.


Dear heavenly father ask you interact in this young man Ardain from his deepest pain give him hope encouragement, success, love, kindness, and health to protect his well being throughout his long journeys on this earth even thro he doesn’t know any one of us personally online send each and every body’s spiritual garden angles to say a prayer for him let come from within his storms I ask you heavenly father don’t let his fate fail him let him sail cover him so that his fate want fade away keep all his enemies any keep any negativity from family, friends, outsiders, co-workers. Keep his spirits high above the sun so him that his son is the reason why he has to continue his long journey and live. Each and everyday show him that a kiss, a hug a talk with his son is the most important because his son will be the one to watch over him like his son’s angle witch is his father watch over him. In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit I pray amen.


To all of the members of MJJC I love you all because your grace keeps me lifted may god bless. Ardain I love u
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
To be truthful i always wanted to rap and get out be famous. Not to sound conceited are naive but i always believed i'd be known out there. And once i make it under the grace of god. U know i'm shouting out mjj community where ever lmfao. I can also sing as well. Pure voice no autotune. I just wished i had connects.
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aww kool, do you have anything we can hear??

xxx
 
@ jackie no i dont have any thingyet for you to hear but i will soon.

@ the truth be told thank u so much my love i felt that. tomorrow is my b-day so thank you all. and to truth be told i love you to my love.
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
@ jackie no i dont have any thingyet for you to hear but i will soon.

@ the truth be told thank u so much my love i felt that. tomorrow is my b-day so thank you all. and to truth be told i love you to my love.
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ok kool let us know

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, enjoy yourself, leave all your worries behind, start afresh!!!!!!!

lots of love and kisses
Jackie xxxxxxx
 
^^^^ sorry for the long wait hun. it actually went pretty well. i spent alot of time with my family. i loved it oh so much. the same day i found out i finished my second semester of college with a 3.2. so you know i did my mj moonwalk. lol
 
MAKAVELIDAKING said:
^^^^ sorry for the long wait hun. it actually went pretty well. i spent alot of time with my family. i loved it oh so much. the same day i found out i finished my second semester of college with a 3.2. so you know i did my mj moonwalk. lol
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aww wow im happy for you :)

xxx
 
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