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Shy or anxious?

Dangerous 1991 HIStory

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I don't know if topics like this are allowed here, but i don't see anything wrong with my thread.

Do you think that MJ suffered from Social fobia or that he was just shy? We know that he was extremly shy in 80s and once he didn't want to dance infront of 100 people. But he has no problem performing infront of 100000 fans? I can understand this. I also have social fobia. Sometimes it's hard to talk to a small group of people, but sometimes i have no problems with talking infront of 20 people...
 
I dont think Michael had agoraphobia because he was still able to be around big groups of people like stadiums and such. Social phobia? Yes I do think he had that, but of understandable causes, I would develop social phobia too if I was brought up in the limelight and didnt like my own looks. Ive always thought Michaels performances was a part of acting, he did not need to feel insecure or shy when he was dancing because it was all part of an act, the crotch grabbing and all.. It was all an act, and maybe it made it easier for him to perform if he kept in mind to keep his stage image and off-stage image seperate. Off stage he was shy, on stage he let his wild side loose. Not uncommon at all.. I can be shy when Im at home, but when I go to a job interview or to work I put on this act and ''become'' really confident and a good speaker so that no one can sence my insecurities.

I think Michael felt that way too.. He put on this really tough image, like Bad and other references so that people wouldnt pick on him, he had this tough exterior and even though he was shy on the inside.. He wanted people to know he's not to mess with.

Maybe Michael was social phobic through different stages in his life... Fed up with paparazzi... Fed up with newsreporters and interviews.. Fed up with courthearings.. Fed up with people betraying him, not being able to trust people who hurt him once, twice and then yet some more.. Constantly surrounded by fans, bodybuards, security guards, housemaids, managers.. Theres so many aspects of his life where he had to deal and interact with people. I wonder was there ever a time he had alone-time for himself?

I think Michael was pretty remarkable for maintaining his sanity considering how long he had to live in the spotlight and the chasing and the madness. If I was Michael I would have probably isolated myself and quit the business in my mid 20's and changed my name. People who say Michael was crazy are in my opinion crazy themselves because they have no idea what he had to endure and he never lost his ground, remained down to earth and remained sane. Sure, he built Neverland to have some privacy, he wore the masks... But I would too.
 
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MichaelMySoul said:
Ive always thought Michaels performances was a part of acting, he did not need to feel insecure or shy when he was dancing because it was all part of an act, the crotch grabbing and all..
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That's exactly what I think about him. In fact, he himself said that on an interview to Interview magazine in 1982.

I would post the source if it wasn't translated to Portuguese. =)

MichaelMySoul said:
I think Michael was pretty remarkable for maintaining his sanity considering how long he had to live in the spotlight and the chasing and the madness. If I was Michael I would have probably isolated myself and quit the business in my mid 20's and changed my name. People who say Michael was crazy are in my opinion crazy themselves because they have no idea what he had to endure and he never lost his ground, remained down to earth and remained sane. Sure, he built Neverland to have some privacy, he wore the masks... But I would too.
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Since his death, I have watched and rewatched tons of videos I reached the very same conclusion. I would have gone crazy if I were him. People a lot less successful go totally nuts and people who worked with him said he was pretty down to earth, which is for itself a remarkable feat on this business.
 
i think Michael Schumacher explained it better.
 
well about the dancing in front of 100 ppple and 1000 pple is simply becuz he felt comfortable on stage,like no1 could get to him. im sort of te same way,i hate dancing in front of pple or @ parties lol but if i was on stage or in a talent show id go nutts. Ask soso def lol,she didnt even know i cud dance until after we left california and i started dancing in the car wash parking lot lol.
 
I think he probably had a bit of both. He was no doubt extremely shy and seemed like he fell apart when he was one on one with people for the most part.

Seems that he was insecure with everything but what he knew he was good at which was entertaining. Maybe he had a fear of rejection or something.

Who knows....

Miss you Mike! Shy guys are the best. :D
 
I think Michael was definitely shy. Agoraphobic , No. At least not in my humble opinion.

Let me give you an example. There was a rumor started outside a restaurant somewhere that MJ was eating on the second floor balcony. There were like fake security guards with suits ..... so first there was like a couple of people looking up saying MICHAEL, MICHAEL,... then passers by started believing that it was MJ up there. Time passed, then there was like 30 people all looking up at an empty balcony, chanting MICHAEL while stopping traffic.
Michael wasn't there. He never was. It was a hoax.

My point is this.... where could he have gone without 1000 people descending on him yelling, screaming, wanting autographs, and going HYSTERICAL. Any normal (and MJ was normal) would want to avoid this. Thats why he had Neverland. And look what happened. Even his sanctuary, his home was defiled by two families. Let me not get started on the constant betrayal he had to deal with. Sorry for the rant.
 
yes, the betrayal. it's unbelievable what he had to go through.

and it's unbelievable to me that some people (a LOTTA people) STILL don't see it. to them, he's "wierd". WIERD?!?!?!? geez...
 
MJJKingforever said:
I don't know if topics like this are allowed here, but i don't see anything wrong with my thread.

Do you think that MJ suffered from Social fobia or that he was just shy? We know that he was extremly shy in 80s and once he didn't want to dance infront of 100 people. But he has no problem performing infront of 100000 fans? I can understand this. I also have social fobia. Sometimes it's hard to talk to a small group of people, but sometimes i have no problems with talking infront of 20 people...
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I think MJ had some sort of social phobia. It's one thing to talk face-to-face with a person, but it's an impersonal thing, to perform your music in front of thousands. I suffer the same thing. When I am at a party, I am usually very shy. I tend not to want to talk to too many people, it scares me. But, I am also a singer. I have no problem standing up and singing and playing flute in front of hundreds of people....its more impersonal...
 
he definitely had anxiety which is why he preferred children/animals to adults, they wouldn't judge him
 
he also wore sunglasses a lot and didnt make eye contact with people in the 80s.

A_Powerful_Mind said:
I think he probably had a bit of both. He was no doubt extremely shy and seemed like he fell apart when he was one on one with people for the most part.

Seems that he was insecure with everything but what he knew he was good at which was entertaining. Maybe he had a fear of rejection or something.
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i agree, goes with being a perfectionist.
 
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mspennyloafer said:
he definitely had anxiety which is why he preferred children/animals to adults, they wouldn't judge him
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anxiety is different from phobia, right? I also think MJ had insecurities, like a normal person.

You're right, the sunglasses thing. HE WAS SO CUTE. I keep watching the grammy clips from '84, when he didn't want to take the sunglasses off, but then he promised someone he would, so he finally did for a moment then got really shy and walked of the stage. CUTE.
 
yeah i've watched that youtube so many times!! there's these convos where he says that he wore sunglasses to hide his soul. i don't know if they're real or not, i don't think we're allowed to discuss them here.

he had more than your avg. insecurities. i guess i can't go into why on here but that seems fairly obvious and makes him more human and less celebritylike to me.
 
Social anxiety is a term used to describe an experience of anxiety (emotional discomfort, fear, apprehension or worry) regarding social situations, interactions with others and being evaluated or scrutinized by other people.[1] It occurs early in childhood as a normal part of the development of social functioning, but may go unnoticed until adolescence [2]. People vary in how often they experience social anxiety or in which kinds of situations. It can be related to shyness or other emotional or temperamental factors, but its exact nature is still the subject of research and theory.

A psychopathological form of social anxiety is called "social anxiety disorder" or social phobia. This disorder can become major obsessions and can result in a reduced quality of life. Social anxiety can be self-integrated and persistent for people who suffer from O.C.D, which can make social anxiety even harder to control, especially if ignored. [1]

Some use the terms "social anxiety" and "social phobia" interchangeably.[3][4]
 
mspennyloafer said:
Social anxiety is a term used to describe an experience of anxiety (emotional discomfort, fear, apprehension or worry) regarding social situations, interactions with others and being evaluated or scrutinized by other people.[1] It occurs early in childhood as a normal part of the development of social functioning, but may go unnoticed until adolescence [2]. People vary in how often they experience social anxiety or in which kinds of situations. It can be related to shyness or other emotional or temperamental factors, but its exact nature is still the subject of research and theory.

A psychopathological form of social anxiety is called "social anxiety disorder" or social phobia. This disorder can become major obsessions and can result in a reduced quality of life. Social anxiety can be self-integrated and persistent for people who suffer from O.C.D, which can make social anxiety even harder to control, especially if ignored. [1]

Some use the terms "social anxiety" and "social phobia" interchangeably.[3][4]
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MODS- sorry if I am breaking any rules. Please let me know if I am so I don't do it.

With that said..... you know let me research a little before i comment any more on it. you certainly have good points and I need to educate my self before I go any further.
 
I would say that Michael was shy when he wasn't dancing...but according to his words in books and in interviews, MJ was another person when he danced and sing because he was like "conected" to the music itself, so I think that he was so focused in the music that he was able to perfom in front of 100000 thousand people without problem^^
 
maybe reserved, not really shy though. he always had people around him, he was used to the crowds and attention. i'm pretty sure he enjoyed it too, to an extent, but he - like anyone - wanted some privacy sometimes. that's what neverland and the masks and sunglasses and lack of interviews was all about. he wasn't shy, he wanted to maintain his privacy, and that is completely understandable considering fans wanted to know everything about him.
 
I don't think we can use these labels like social phobia on MJ, there was nothing normal about MJ environment, althoug he was normal, I think he withdrew due to not being able to trust people including his inner circle as they let him down and betrayed him and lies media told. He wrote in his autobiography that he couldn't even get books out of library with out the whole world knowing, and that was 20 years ago. Goodness knows it absolutely brutal so he withdrew further. Yes he was shy, but so are lots of people, being shy and having to put up with this invasion to this degree of privacy must have been hell. shyness is not a social phobia which is a label used by psychiatrist and regarded as a mental illness.
 
i'm pretty shy and do have a social phobia at times as well.... i always felt that in that way i was similar to Mike, however when there is music and when performing in front of people i just go all out and i feel that comfort zone.
 
being on stage in front of hundreds or even thousands can feel like one big giant eyeball is staring at you. you can't actually see individual people. so it's not so intimidating (i guess). but actually having to talk and perform in front of say 5 people..is different. I remember when Michael didn't even want to dance for bash!t in the LWMJ "documentary"..it's just a different environment i guess.

i agree he was cute shy. he had a tenderness about him that i could not stop loving. but he said he was shy. of course he might have been anxious...we was human..we're all anxious at some point in our lives :)
 
I think michael felt stage was home for him.Like he said in the oprah winfrey interview '' on stage for me was home,i felt most comfortable on stage -butonce i get off i felt sad''. Im sure he said that or somethin simliar.
 
i think Michael not be anxious, just a bit of shy only.
But don't you think that Michael was cute when he was shy too???
just likes the oprah's interview, oprah said" Can you showed here??"
and Michael said" oh no, please...i'm shy."
or, why MIchael will be anxious???there're no any reasons will make he feels anxious.
So that's why i said Michael just has a bit of shy since i believed what he told.
and there have one more reasons is children will not judge him, but adult will.

RIP Michael
I'll never let you part,
For you're always in my heart...
 
he was very very shy with people
put that together with someone who's constantly being torn apart and scrutinized by the media and the general public and you have someone who will act a little neurotic too at times - who wouldn't?
I remember fans saying how they didn't want to be in his place just because of that - the public scrutiny the stress the madness! all the glamour is not worth that kind of sacrifice
 
I'm guessing early 80s is when the vitiligo was making a noticeable change in his appearance, I'd probably feel a bit social phobic if I was a famous superstar being watched by hundreds or even thousands and was losing control of my own looks. I think he was also shy around new people too since the only people he had regular contact with was family, other stars, and music directors while his fans were all after rushing up and clutching to him for dear life.

Perhaps in his later years after the allegations it wasn't much a case of social phobia around new people but a lack of trust and fear that everyone was out to get him one way or another.
 
MichaelMySoul said:
I think Michael was pretty remarkable for maintaining his sanity considering how long he had to live in the spotlight and the chasing and the madness. If I was Michael I would have probably isolated myself and quit the business in my mid 20's and changed my name. People who say Michael was crazy are in my opinion crazy themselves because they have no idea what he had to endure and he never lost his ground, remained down to earth and remained sane. Sure, he built Neverland to have some privacy, he wore the masks... But I would too.
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Very well said, I always try and imagine his life and think he did so well with all that was thrown at him, bless him.
 
I don't see how he wouldn't have social anxiety after what he had to go through. Didn't get to have a childhood, pressured to perform, all the media/paparazzi crap. Of course he dealt with it all extremely well I think. If it were me I probably wouldn't want to leave my house. It is possible to lose all that and put on an air of confidence on stage though. Actually his shyness is what initially drew me to him because I have social anxiety. I felt I could really identify with him.
 
I think Michael was just a shy person, and did really like to socialise and just stick with people he knew. I think Michael was less shy from his late 20's, he seemed most shy from around 16-27yrs old. After that I think Michael always remained shy but became more of a reserved person had more control over his shyness. Although sometimes it can be difficult to control shyness when you are in social situations.

One of the reasons I think the media thought Michael was really weird and thought himself above everyone, is because they mistook his shyness for arrogance as that's how many people read shyness. Michael was shy and he never came across as articulate as he really was when interviewed, and did come across as someone who's mind was elsewhere (a creative person trait) because he felt uncompfortable in interviews. Many shy people are viewed as arrogant or weird, and I personally don't see why everyone has to be very socialble because that doesn't always make someone a nice person.
 
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^yeaa i think shyness does come off as arrogance/weirdness sadly. i grew up really shy. and people thought i was odd when i talked, they said i talked soft or different. shy people have this mannerism to them, i guess. but i can tell ya in general shy people can get social anxiety and it makes sense for it to be linked. i got it. but then you get help. and in worse situations agoraphobia.
but you can be both. and if he took xanax, anxiety was in his life. social, or in general. look what he went through in his life.
 
I wouldn't be surprised. But i liked his shy retiring nature. I think it kind of alleviated itself later on though. It was really apparent in the early era's but once it got about BOTDF, you could tell he was like, " yeah im kind of used to this " Espcially in interviews
 
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