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I Though I Was Coping With His Death.. Until...

writting your feelings out is a very good way to dal with lonliness and grieving....better than being bottled up and causing inner problems...
 
That is an absolutely breathtaking picture of Michael on your wall. Looks like it is from the In The Closet shoot. Do you know if they make a poster of that?
 
Billie_Jean09 said:
Lovely Mj......and the other billie jean.and everyone..........we are in this pain together..........:(
Let's try to be strong together................
God knows how bad I have been regarding MJ's passing..........BUT...........MJ is still around.........ask him.talk to him.........he will answer you.........dream of him.ask for a sign.......
This is not some airy fairy cheesy remarks.........but MJ is still very much about in our hearts.............not just there...EVERYWHERE!!! :wub:

Plz know this..............MJ is in another realm..........he still IS........

Love you all xxx
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God it just made me cry. i know you are so right
our beautiful Michael ....
 
I sometimes wonder if I'll make it through all of this pain!
it seems kind of..difficult to live this loooong "happy" life.
Things that made me happy doesn't anymore.
at least not the same way. I could enjoy the stars before.I loved them! .now I look up to the sky and all I see is an empty sky. nothing.
 
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stineLOVESmichael said:
I sometimes wonder if I'll make it through all of this pain! it seems kind of..difficult to live this loooong "happy" life. Things that made me happy doesn't anymore.
at least not the same way. I could enjoy the stars before.I loves them! .now I look up to the sky and all I see is an empty sky. nothing.
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I feel the same way. Since my childhood I've connected the night sky with Michael and hope. Now I feel as if I am finally facing the harsh reality. And the trouble is... I was so convinced that I would finally see/meet him this year. But the DREAM is over. I don't know when this pain will pass, either. But I think we are all receiving a Michael withdrawal treatment.
 
AlvaMJJ said:
I feel the same way. Since my childhood I've connected the night sky with Michael and hope. Now I feel as if I am finally facing the harsh reality. And the trouble is... I was so convinced that I would finally see/meet him this year. But the DREAM is over. I don't know when this pain will pass, either. But I think we are all receiving a Michael withdrawal treatment.
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:( same..same..
ahhh I was convinced too!
my mum bought me a front row concert ticket as a birthday gift in May!. it made me cry. because THAT is the BEST birthday present I could EVER, EVERRRR get! omg! after 15 years of dreaming about it that maybe SOME day.. it happened!! but then.
and now..I don't even want x-mas presents..all I want for x-mas is Michael back:no: these "things".. I don't need them! I don't need any stuff I just want HIIIM!!
 
When I watched the film with my mum and her friend, I pointed out the t-shirt and told them the story behind it. They were in floods of tears, and they're not fans! :cry: It did make me teary thinking about it, but it also makes me smile knowing how special we were to him. Not many stars would wear something fan-made like that - Michael was so humble, so loving :D

Sending love, L.O.V.E. We're all finding it really hard, you don't have to suffer alone and this is a great thing - we're all here for each other, something that wouldn't have been possible even 10 years ago before the internet became as big as it is. Stay strong hun xxx
 
It has been hard. Somedays I feel okay and like it's getting better but then I will read a story or something and it hits me like a ton of bricks. I will just start crying and I feel this pain inside. Even watching the AMA's on Sunday I cheered when he won but then right away my heart sank because he wasn't there to accept his awards. Just talking about him in the past tense feels very weird. Michael was....It doesn't feel right. When I saw This is It, I smiled and laughed a lot but when I got home and think about it I feel so sad. People in my family wonder why I haven't gotten over it but I haven't. In time it will get better but to be over it? I don't think we ever will.
 
I thought I was coping well too until thanksgiving. :cry:

I was sending my friends e-cards, thanking them...but who I really wanted to thank was my baby Michael. :cry:
 
The sad feeling goes and comes back all the time. I try to hold my tears at times. Don't think the pain will ever stop.
 
I think of michael the morning I wake up and the morning I go to bed. Theres not a day that goes by that I dont think of him. I miss him so so much!! There hasnt been a day where I just dont break down and cry, its been so hard. This just all still feels like a nightmare, I just wanna wake up from. Like to think just in march michael announced his concerts in london, then 5 months later he passes? now its been 5 months later and the year is almost over....I dont get it, I dont understand all of this??? If it wasnt for murray michael would still be here....I just still cant believe this.
 
There comes a time in every day that my heart breaks all over again however I cry only once every few weeks.

I wish I cried everytime to get it off my chest...
 
I saw this and felt I needed to respond. I have been through wvery emotion from A to Z. Just when I felt stronger and could talk about things regarding Michael a piece of news will break, ususally for me the news that hits me hardest involves MURRAY then, I get so angry. I don't know how to deal with all of this, so I have to take it a day at a time.

For me, I've lost a family member in 05, 2 in 06 and when I think things will even out so I can move on, this happens to our Michael. Oh, God, all I can do is pray for strength coz this is HUGE!
 
DanceOfZenab1994 said:
There comes a time in every day that my heart breaks all over again however I cry only once every few weeks.

I wish I cried everytime to get it off my chest...
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this.
everyday. it can just happen out of nowhere. I think of him, someone says something, i see him on tv, here.or whatever! and it hurts and feels like my heart got stabbed and cut in to 1000 pieces.
there's no use in trying to DESCRIBE THE PAIN. no words can justify HOW MUCH it hurts.

so..
I cry at least once a day, still. "cry" is all from..tears down my face... or just a tear in the corner of my eye..or really really CRYING out loud!!! oh dear michael :cry::angel:
 
MJ's death is the same as losing a beloved family member. The moments of crying, and/or sadness will remain, for the rest of my life. The emotions come and go. But, I also have the wonderful memories. And, the memories give me strength to carry on.
 
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this year has made me wish that all years would go away, and eternity would begin. after this year, and what happened to Michael..all years are evil to me. i have never given years thought, until this. i just never imagined shit like this. i never imagined.

i can't cope.
 
vncwilliam said:
this year has made me wish that all years would go away, and eternity would begin. after this year, and what happened to Michael..all years are evil to me. i have never given years thought, until this. i just never imagined shit like this. i never imagined.
i can't cope.
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I also thought that finally everything will be alright. Michael's life ought to take actually a postive turn in all possible aspects. And I can't explain to me why everything has gone so wrong in his life. I wonder what forces were behind these blows of fate. In the end...everything has turned out to be a big disappointment.

I also find it difficult to deal with this new situation. Michael was like a last security for me. He gave me confidence and he was my consolation. It seems to me that everything good in life is simply torn away. Without any warning, and an understanding reason. I can only shake my head at that.
 
stineLOVESmichael said:
:( same..same..
ahhh I was convinced too! my mum bought me a front row concert ticket as a birthday gift in May!. it made me cry. because THAT is the BEST birthday present I could EVER, EVERRRR get! omg! after 15 years of dreaming about it that maybe SOME day.. it happened!! but then
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You must have a great mom! That was a heartfelt gift from her. It shows that she cares about your feelings.:yes:


stineLOVESmichael said:
and now..I don't even want x-mas presents..all I want for x-mas is Michael back:no: these "things".. I don't need them! I don't need any stuff I just want HIIIM!!
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I want nothing other than Michael back for Christmas, too.:cry:
 
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