Re: Sundance Festival 2019 - Controversial MJ Documentary "Leaving Neverland"
I understand all of that BUT the person who they accused, the people who questioned them even at a YOUNG age; the constance asking by others if they were ever a abused in private and public even after death does NOT fit with someone who you are describing. Also, Mike was NOT a family member someone whom they HAD to live with and deal with. MJ was NOT even a neighbor. The guys could not think anything is "normal" because they always was asked about it and had to deal with it since. Even the stuff you are talking about, I understand. At 7 years old, I had a cousin to touch me twice improper and I NEVER defended him; in fact, I always left the room when he came over and I did not want to go to his house to get something for my grandmother. The point is, as someone who has been through this, worked in this, these guys does NOT fit this. You can not believe something is "normal" when you are WILLING to talk and defend even when you are grown and the person you are accusing is on trial and who you all defended even after he died and then wanting to sue for $100 million dollars and when you lost that suite, you now at a gala talking about it. Give me a break. I have never seen people who are really abused by people, priest, even look at Harvey Weinstein, how many of those people ever defended Weinstein or anyone? NONE.) let alone in court and then change their minds. Even the girl name SMART who was kidnapped and living with her abusers NEVER defended them when they were CAUGHT and put on trial.
first of all, I believe that michael was innocent, but leave this apart, i would explain that this case is more complex, because the experts known there are more types of abuse, more complex and more harmful.
The case of Weinstein has nothing to do, most are adults and Wenstein was not kind or good to these people, was unpleasant, blackmailer and, sometimes, violent victims of Weinstein adults have not had child abuse with mental contradiction which implies and also have been abused in a rude manner. The same for the case of the person who lived with their abusers for years, was mistreated, in a very bad way. It is another type of abuse. In children there are different types of abuse, one of them goes through a "consensual" abuse, the child gives his consent because he thinks it is okay to do it because the abuser has told him, although obviously he does not have the mental capacity. be really spoiled The child, in these cases, even idolatrous and loves his abuser, has a careful relationship of great trust and the abused loves to be with the abuser because he has fun with him, cares for him and loves him, and feels special with him . In this relationship of trust and love, the abuser introduces the child in caresses, kisses and makes him understand that it is normal and that he should not embarrass, never force him, do everything with love and slowly so that the child doesnt leaves and the child simply It allows you to do it because he thinks it's not wrong. This begins like this, for days or weeks in which there are only a few kisses, some caresses and the child accepts it, the rest of the time the child keeps having fun with the abuser and respects him because he takes care of him. and treat it well. Over time and it depends on the child's ability to access sexual games, the abuser is introducing more caresses, sometimes inside the clothes, and the abuser explains to the child that this is normal, that it is not bad, besides that the child enters into contradiction because His body reacts to the caresses and they are pleasant. On the one hand, he feels uncomfortable, but on the other, he can feel pleasure because the body reacts to any caress, which makes children have a great contradiction because the caresses like them and dislike them at the same time, and they also let themselves be carried away.
this results in a feeling in them that they participated in these sexual caresses and games because they liked It. even when they are adults feel that they too did to be touched and normalized since childs in their minds the situation like normal sexual games , the same sexual games they have " children with children "but these are bad because they are between an adult and a child. when they are adults they do not report because they feel that they did let themselves be done. While this is happening it is all soft, slow, if the child does not want one more, he stops, never the abuser forces him, starts as a game or a teaching with the abuser , and it is progressive, delicate, they do it even with love and the child is left to do it because it normalizes it and sometimes even it is pleasant, in addition the child feels love for his abuser and does not want to harm him for something they did together, that's why he can even defend your abuser as an adult, and abuses end at a certain age, the age at which the child already discerns between good and evil and if the relationship with the abuser continues to be good, loving and trustworthy as before but no longer abused, so the child leaves behind everything he experienced and his way of processing it is to think that it was something he accessed because he also liked it and tries to leave it behind for the sake of the relationship with the abuser (who no longer abuse it and treat it well) and shame because he feels that he also let himself be done.
The victim stay for years in silence for not making a scandal of something so intimate that I've been doing for years .. the victim feel guilty with himself , the childhood that adult has not been able to process all of that in the right way and the feelings he feels are very contradictory. The victim loves his abuser because he was good for him (loving, humble,generous etc..)But inside he knowns that something bad happened, years of mental contradicion ...this type of abuse is one of the most complex.
I think Michael did not do it, but for the experts, the case of wade is easy to explain, and the case of james still more, that's why I think that whoever sees the documentary will believe them.
people have the concept that abusers are always abusers and they are bad, but most are not abusers all the time, although some are violent, rude, and the child does not want to be with them, other types of abusers respond to a typology very concrete, they do not harm children to abuse them, they do it with affection and delicately, even in abuses. They are normal people, even kind, educated, who do not harm a fly for the rest of the world, and when a child is involved in this is a very difficult situation because children are not forced. This type of abuse is different from forced abuse, from "non-consensual", and more difficult to recognize for victims as "abuse", for those victims for years they will be "consensual games".
the subject is delicate.
I Hope taj And family work in a good documentary soon,
