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When I think it's going better.. It's only getting worse..

MIchael.Mania

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The last couple of days have been hell to me. I conciddered suicide a couple of times. I almost drunk myself to death. I used many painkillers and ended up in the hospital where I spent the night 2 days ago..

After that, things were getting a bit better. But now I feel like it's getting all over again. I feel even worse than in the beginning. Michael is on every tv channel, I have his music on 24 hours a day and again, I am not feeling well. I cannot believe that the person who was a logical part of the world is no more. I just can't live anymore. The thing I am most affraid about is that he will be forgotten. The next generation will see Michael as how we see Elvis Presley and the Beatles and from there on he will be pushed to the past and will be forgotten by people.

I can't live with that thought. Michael who dedicated his LIFE for his music and for the world can never be forgotten. He is not 'just' a popstar. He is a superhuman.

I am so affraid. Affraid of living. I don't know how to go on. I don't want to live anymore.. I hope God can give me the strength I need.. Because it's a small step for me to follow Michael at this moment.

My world has collapsed and I feel so, so lonely.
 
I know this is hard but you have to stay strong. Michael would not want anyone to harm themselves or end their life because of his death. It will get easier with time. And know that we are all here for you. We will get through this together.
 
MIchael.Mania said:
The last couple of days have been hell to me. I conciddered suicide a couple of times. I almost drunk myself to death. I used many painkillers and ended up in the hospital where I spent the night 2 days ago..

After that, things were getting a bit better. But now I feel like it's getting all over again. I feel even worse than in the beginning. Michael is on every tv channel, I have his music on 24 hours a day and again, I am not feeling well. I cannot believe that the person who was a logical part of the world is no more. I just can't live anymore. The thing I am most affraid about is that he will be forgotten. The next generation will see Michael as how we see Elvis Presley and the Beatles and from there on he will be pushed to the past and will be forgotten by people.

I can't live with that thought. Michael who dedicated his LIFE for his music and for the world can never be forgotten. He is not 'just' a popstar. He is a superhuman.

I am so affraid. Affraid of living. I don't know how to go on. I don't want to live anymore.. I hope God can give me the strength I need.. Because it's a small step for me to follow Michael at this moment.

My world has collapsed and I feel so, so lonely.
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You will survive this, together with us. Let the meds and alcohol be, they only make things worse once the affect has worn off. Life can indeed be a scary thing, but it also contains so much beauty and precious moments. Maybe by trying to remember those moments you will find the strenght to carry on. Michael will not be forgotten, for his legacy is tremendously great. Elvis has not been forgotten, neither have the Beatles. It is up to us to carry on Michaels legacy and the only way we can to that is by sticking together and keep on living the dream. You can do it too, just have a little bit of faith in yourself!
 
Please understand that as long as you are living, you are still needed. Michael's time was up...unfortunately, but it was. Imagine how his mom or his kids feel? Yes it is beyond shocking, but its reality. Please lets be the best we can be, like he always believed in doing. Michael would never want you to cause any harm to yourself because of him...he loved life...and he lived it to the fullest. He never took any moment of his life for granted...please be strong!
Love your fellow Michael Jackson fan.
 
I am the same. I don't think the worst has hit me yet, although I can't imagine it being any worse. I have never been in such grief and agony, never, not even when my father and grandma died within 2 weeks. At that time I had Michael to lift me up, give me an enormous strength, ease the pain... Now, there is nothing, absolutely nothing...
 
micah said:
I am the same. I don't think the worst has hit me yet, although I can't imagine it being any worse. I have never been in such grief and agony, never, not even when my father and grandma died within 2 weeks. At that time I had Michael to lift me up, give me an enormous strength, ease the pain... Now, there is nothing, absolutely nothing...
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That is EXACTLY how I feel. When my grandmother died, I had Michael to comfort me. Now that he's gone, there's nothing. It's so hard to deal with, but it has to get better. It just has to.

Michael.Mania, Michael will NEVER be forgotten. We will all make sure of that, I promise.
 
micah said:
I am the same. I don't think the worst has hit me yet, although I can't imagine it being any worse. I have never been in such grief and agony, never, not even when my father and grandma died within 2 weeks. At that time I had Michael to lift me up, give me an enormous strength, ease the pain... Now, there is nothing, absolutely nothing...
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I know how you feel! I feel the same! Everytime I had a problem Michael was my confort! Now he is not here anymore and that scares me so much! But I hope he will take care of us from Heaven!
 
you must believe in him. he is still there, just try to feel him again!
but im also afraid that in 20 years noone cares about the king who created music.
that makes me very sad :(
 
Michael will not be forgotten. He has 3 kids to keep his legacy.

Also, his music will live on and now it can be released without the weight of his ditractors getting in the way.

He has over 100 recorded songs, including "I have a dream"

These songs and videos will be released progressively for the next 10 to 20 to 30 years as there is an established record label with an interest to do so and also Michael's mum who has appointed a good lawyer to oversee his estate and interests.
 
Just remember that when you who lost loved ones and leaned on Michael, we still have him to lean on through this time of agony. Michael's spirit lives on forever through his music no matter what. He gave us multitudes of music. And as he said himself, he put his soul into his music. As long as he is in our hearts Michael will always be with us in spirit.
 
Thank you all so very much for your support. It honestly does me very good. I have to be strong, even though it's the hardest thing I have ever experienced in my life. Thank you all. I am still affraid that in 10 or 20 years he will be forgotten as 'The King of Pop' :-(
 
Michael couldn,t be closer to you then living in your heart.
Michael,s spirit is there, i,m convinced by that.
He takes care of all the people who are in pain right now.....
Feel him and let him life in your heart.
because that,s the closest place a person can be.....
 
I too am terrified of him being forgotten. I am going to make sure i spread his music for the rest of my life. I aso worry about this site fizzling out and people forgetting about it and stopping coming online. I am only 17 and the rest of my life seems like an awful long time to be without Michael.
 
Michael won't be forgotten - Elvis is still famous, look how many Elvis impersonators there are! It will be much more so with Michael - and for those of us who worry about this......IT IS UP TO US!!!!!! It is up to US to keep his spirit and memory and music alive and celebrate it. Let's do it.


For those who are suicidal &/or struggling - I feel the pain too. lots. I have been suicidal before and I have been through grief before. It hurts like hell, feels totally overwhelming and neverending and crap. This may not seem possible to you know but it DOES get better. Time does heal - either totally or partially.

Michael would feel awful, to see his death causing more deaths and more grief (for our families). Michael went thru enough crap in his life, PLEASE :angel: let's not give him anymore!!! :no: Michael went through horrid stuff, and must have felt worse than what we feel now at his lowest points. But even then he did not give up, his life fell & he picked it up & kept moving on & up.

We can do this together. Emotions of grief ARE intense, they ARE shit. but we can survive them, we have to, for Michael and for our loved ones and cos WE ARE THE ONES whose job it is to ensure Michael is NOT forgotten :yes:
 
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