What do I do?

[TillitsGone]

This is a confusing situation for me. I have to be real; I don't have much of a life otuside the computer. I'm only 16, and I don't go to public school, no part time job or whatever, no real friends on the outside. I have to be on the computer because I'm still getting my education from one online school website, but how am I gonna focus knowing that whenever I come on here, there's no more happy days? And if it's that bad for me, why not just leave, but you know what; I CAN'T leave. MJ has became a part of my life, my 'little world', and know it's like I have to change all of that. I have to get rid of a 'bad habit'. The thought of having to drastically change things is so overwhelming to me, that I don't know if I can really take it. It's pretty scary...

So there it is. Maybe some of you are going through the same situations, if not as identical to me, abut in a different way??

 

[violet]

Hey Till

Yes many of us are going through similar things in our own way.

My own life fell apart a couple years ago & 2 new things came along to sort me out. One was Michael

I've been living for 2 dreams - to see Michael in person or stage; and to buy some land for my family. Both I expected to occur this year. On the one sad day the land I was planning to buy sold to someone else and MJ departed.

Yes drastic changes do seem overwhelming and scary. For me they stay that way for a bit but it DOES get better, it doesn't seem possible now but u just gotta hang in there and it will. try to keep it in mind even if u don't believe me now

BAby steps are the key to lasting change.. and less drastic ..we are all still here, MJ is certainly still here in spirit in and around all of us who allow him to be. maybe u could see the 'good habits' MJ inspires you with and .....(later on, as the grief scary bits ease).....they will lead you on a new exciting path? baby steps .... (((((big hugs))))

 

[wendijane]

till
please know that the happyness hasnt gone, it goes on darling:huggy: for infinity and beyond k ,
i feel so ...ugh like a wreak today too im unable to type the words but we have to belive we will make this , we are strong like our michael showed us to be
please know you can email me or asdd me to msn if you have that ? if it somehow helps ?
you havnt lost me darling,

 

[TillitsGone]

Thanks for the responses so far. Honestly, I was sorta planning on changing some thing too, like two/three days ago. I told myself that I was gonna work hard to get what work I could completed and sent to my teachers, until July the 13th. It's a long story kinda, but let's just say I have alot of schoolwork, so much that it's probably out of my hands to do alone until August. That and with the job thing and other stuff, and this social awkwardness/anxiety type thing, it's gonna be hard. Maybe it's truly time to change things...

Note: Yeah wendijane, I'll keep that in mind. :heart:

 

[TillitsGone]

Ugh, newsflash: I was on the phone with my dad a few hours ago. His stepfather is in the hospital, and the doctors say he might not have much time to live. My grandad has cancer, and he's been battling it for awhile now. He's in his early 70s.

This whole thing is so confusing, and I feel bad in a way because it's like I took him for granted sometimes. My father'd be like 'make sure you visit your grandparents' an stuff like, and I'd do it (occasionally), but for the most part I never really cared.

Sigh... what the heck is going on? :sad:

 

[Autumn II]

This is a sad and wrenching time, and hits hard. One thing to remember is that this was so unexpected, and the grief is still raw. Time will pass, and it won't always hurt so intensely. Michael brought people TOGETHER, such as on this board. The people, the friends, those who share a common interest, are still HERE. The music is still here. I'm sure there will be new music released from Michael's tremendous back-log of material. The dream of seeing him in person is gone, but there is the legacy to consider, and the fans must carry that legacy forward. There is still purpose, here.

So please keep coming back to the board, and reaching out to people in your life, as well. . . . .