staywild23
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Today, on the 15th anniversary of Michael’s death, I was struck once again by a reminder of Michael Jackson's global impact. I’d like to share some thoughts on this…
I’ve been a fan of Michael’s for less than 3 years, but in that time, I have developed the most intense love and admiration for him. As massive an artist as Michael is, on a day-to-day basis, my relationship to him is quite individual. While I have a couple of MJ friends I speak to often (who I met through the fandom), I didn’t grow up in a family of MJ fans, or with many people in my life who listened to him. I “discovered” him all on my own and so I am mostly alone in my love for him. I’ve invited others in and while some get it, at least as much as they are able to, most people don’t. That’s fine I guess.
But for a newer fan, this can sometimes feel jarring.
Despite it being 15 years since his death, Michael is the most current, contemporary artist in *my* life.
He is the only artist I listen to every single day.
EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
He is the only artist I follow on social media, whose fandom I engage with regularly.
He is the only artist I constantly read about, whose full concerts I watch over and over, whose interviews I watch (to the point of memorization), and whose photos I look at every day.
He is the only artist who has profoundly inspired me as an artist, educator, and human being. He is impacted me emotionally, spiritually, and in so many other ways I can’t even describe.
He is the only artist whose voice can soothe and provoke me in equal measure. No matter what I’m doing, or how I’m feeling, I want to listen to Michael. On long walks, I listen to him and smile so unabashedly, I just know I must look insane to anyone passing by. Sometimes when I have nightmares, the only thing that can calm me down is listening to his angelic voice.
He is the only artist whose music I feel the need to know as completely as possible and whose legacy I feel some responsibility to protect.
With all of these intense feelings, and still being a newer fan, Michael often feels like a brand new artist to me.
Yet, that is not the reality. The reality is, we live in a world 23 years older than his last album, so naturally stores are no longer filled to the brim with his posters, albums, or magazine covers. Sometimes it can feel almost like he’s a secret only I know. This may sound silly, but it’s just the nature, I believe, of becoming such a massive fan of an artist who has passed away and who, unfortunately, does not have mainstream media on their side enough to routinely honor him the way he deserves.
But today I had a feeling of real unity that I sometimes tap into in this fandom. While sick in bed, I started live-streaming the Reuters video feed of fans at Forest Lawn. Having donated to a couple of different flower arrangements this year, I was excited to see how they would turn out. One glance at this video and it was clear how overwhelmed Forest Lawn is today, not only with floral arrangements, but with fans paying special visits. On social media, I follow several different fans from different countries, many of whom are livestreaming their own visits. In this particular live stream, a group who organizes an event every year, was welcoming the Mayor of Los Angeles as a part of their memorial. I was struck, once again, as I always am, by the diversity of his fans - racially, generationally, nationally, etc. As I watched these strangers filter in and out of view, getting their pictures taken with various displays, I saw one older black man turn his back to the camera. It was then I noticed he was wearing a black jacket, the full back displaying the cover of Dangerous.
Of all of the international representations of MJ's fandom present at Forest Lawn today, I’m not entirely sure why this particular image is the one that would strike me - perhaps because in recent months I’ve probably listened to Dangerous more than any other MJ album - perhaps because I just recently drew my own version of Michael’s eyes in an artistic tribute I’m currently finalizing - perhaps because I can still remember the exact first time I heard "Who Is It" and the way it made my bones chill and my spine tingle, or how I played "Will You Be There" over and over, specifically, for the poem at the end as I wept in sadness, or how the song "Dangerous" makes me want to explode with energy - but this realization that this man, a total stranger on the opposite side of the country, of a different race and generation, loves Michael and has likely loved Michael far longer than I have, knows these songs just like I do felt so unbelievable to me. Almost surreal. It’s like finding out a stranger you bump into on the street was childhood friends with your best friend and you had no idea. What are the chances? It can feel miraculous.
But that’s not it, is it? All day I have seen the posts. Displays in China, Hungary, Russia. Celebrations and remembrances all over the world. So many people remembering him, loving him, missing him. So many people so affected. At one point I sent some photos of the American embassy in Russia adorned with an MJ memorial to my mother and she said “It’s pretty cool people still care so much.” But that’s not it, is it? It’s not just that people care, or that they *still* care. It’s that caring is inevitable. It's that loving and missing Michael is inevitable. You cannot possibly come into the world, the bright beaming force that he was, and not eclipse everything else. You cannot possibly do what he has done, make the impact he has, and expect that anyone can simply move on or forget. “He had an intense emotional impact” is all I could say, because it’s true. As always, it’s not just about the music and it’s not just about the culture. It’s the full totality of the man and what he brought to the world.
A few days ago I had the thought that if you were to create a Venn diagram of the collective global human experience, specifically when it comes to art, media, or culture, one of the few things at the very center of it would be Michael Jackson. This is seemingly backed up by ChartMaster’s recent “study” of the most global artists in music history and finding, unsurprisingly, that Michael reaches far beyond any other artist in history in terms of global impact. Michael and his music has the most profound ability to make you feel intimately connected with him on an individual human level, while also instilling within you a greater oneness with the world. This, I am realizing, may be his greatest gift of all.
I’ve been a fan of Michael’s for less than 3 years, but in that time, I have developed the most intense love and admiration for him. As massive an artist as Michael is, on a day-to-day basis, my relationship to him is quite individual. While I have a couple of MJ friends I speak to often (who I met through the fandom), I didn’t grow up in a family of MJ fans, or with many people in my life who listened to him. I “discovered” him all on my own and so I am mostly alone in my love for him. I’ve invited others in and while some get it, at least as much as they are able to, most people don’t. That’s fine I guess.
But for a newer fan, this can sometimes feel jarring.
Despite it being 15 years since his death, Michael is the most current, contemporary artist in *my* life.
He is the only artist I listen to every single day.
EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
He is the only artist I follow on social media, whose fandom I engage with regularly.
He is the only artist I constantly read about, whose full concerts I watch over and over, whose interviews I watch (to the point of memorization), and whose photos I look at every day.
He is the only artist who has profoundly inspired me as an artist, educator, and human being. He is impacted me emotionally, spiritually, and in so many other ways I can’t even describe.
He is the only artist whose voice can soothe and provoke me in equal measure. No matter what I’m doing, or how I’m feeling, I want to listen to Michael. On long walks, I listen to him and smile so unabashedly, I just know I must look insane to anyone passing by. Sometimes when I have nightmares, the only thing that can calm me down is listening to his angelic voice.
He is the only artist whose music I feel the need to know as completely as possible and whose legacy I feel some responsibility to protect.
With all of these intense feelings, and still being a newer fan, Michael often feels like a brand new artist to me.
Yet, that is not the reality. The reality is, we live in a world 23 years older than his last album, so naturally stores are no longer filled to the brim with his posters, albums, or magazine covers. Sometimes it can feel almost like he’s a secret only I know. This may sound silly, but it’s just the nature, I believe, of becoming such a massive fan of an artist who has passed away and who, unfortunately, does not have mainstream media on their side enough to routinely honor him the way he deserves.
But today I had a feeling of real unity that I sometimes tap into in this fandom. While sick in bed, I started live-streaming the Reuters video feed of fans at Forest Lawn. Having donated to a couple of different flower arrangements this year, I was excited to see how they would turn out. One glance at this video and it was clear how overwhelmed Forest Lawn is today, not only with floral arrangements, but with fans paying special visits. On social media, I follow several different fans from different countries, many of whom are livestreaming their own visits. In this particular live stream, a group who organizes an event every year, was welcoming the Mayor of Los Angeles as a part of their memorial. I was struck, once again, as I always am, by the diversity of his fans - racially, generationally, nationally, etc. As I watched these strangers filter in and out of view, getting their pictures taken with various displays, I saw one older black man turn his back to the camera. It was then I noticed he was wearing a black jacket, the full back displaying the cover of Dangerous.
Of all of the international representations of MJ's fandom present at Forest Lawn today, I’m not entirely sure why this particular image is the one that would strike me - perhaps because in recent months I’ve probably listened to Dangerous more than any other MJ album - perhaps because I just recently drew my own version of Michael’s eyes in an artistic tribute I’m currently finalizing - perhaps because I can still remember the exact first time I heard "Who Is It" and the way it made my bones chill and my spine tingle, or how I played "Will You Be There" over and over, specifically, for the poem at the end as I wept in sadness, or how the song "Dangerous" makes me want to explode with energy - but this realization that this man, a total stranger on the opposite side of the country, of a different race and generation, loves Michael and has likely loved Michael far longer than I have, knows these songs just like I do felt so unbelievable to me. Almost surreal. It’s like finding out a stranger you bump into on the street was childhood friends with your best friend and you had no idea. What are the chances? It can feel miraculous.
But that’s not it, is it? All day I have seen the posts. Displays in China, Hungary, Russia. Celebrations and remembrances all over the world. So many people remembering him, loving him, missing him. So many people so affected. At one point I sent some photos of the American embassy in Russia adorned with an MJ memorial to my mother and she said “It’s pretty cool people still care so much.” But that’s not it, is it? It’s not just that people care, or that they *still* care. It’s that caring is inevitable. It's that loving and missing Michael is inevitable. You cannot possibly come into the world, the bright beaming force that he was, and not eclipse everything else. You cannot possibly do what he has done, make the impact he has, and expect that anyone can simply move on or forget. “He had an intense emotional impact” is all I could say, because it’s true. As always, it’s not just about the music and it’s not just about the culture. It’s the full totality of the man and what he brought to the world.
A few days ago I had the thought that if you were to create a Venn diagram of the collective global human experience, specifically when it comes to art, media, or culture, one of the few things at the very center of it would be Michael Jackson. This is seemingly backed up by ChartMaster’s recent “study” of the most global artists in music history and finding, unsurprisingly, that Michael reaches far beyond any other artist in history in terms of global impact. Michael and his music has the most profound ability to make you feel intimately connected with him on an individual human level, while also instilling within you a greater oneness with the world. This, I am realizing, may be his greatest gift of all.