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Im stuck in a rut....

L.T.D

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So basically since last June. Everything in my life has just crumbled apart.

First my girlfriend left me at the end of May. Although im only young (18) it was devastating as I really did ( and still do love her) and to make things worse, then then goes out with some boy from her school who had liked her for about a year while we were together and allways got on my nerves. Its horrible.

The noly thing I had to look forward to was seeing Michael live, then he died as you all obviously know basically the day after I found out about her and this boy.

On top of that, I still havent had my first job. I really shoudl be getting one, but the thought of it terrifies me!

Its 2010 now and ive started it the same way I spent half of 2009. I really want to move on from all of this!
 
I know how you feel, my life has been about the same way. i am as old as you are, and my relationship has been so much harder now since june. my bf doesnt seem to understand how hard this is for me... i think we have alot in common, so please feel free to pm me if you wanna chat. :)
 
Working is over rated.

You are very young. You will have other girlfriends. You seem very nice. Her loss.
Find something you like doing that you've never done before. perfect something you have done before. Try to better yourself.

I dunno. Why do you think you are in a rut? I know you listed some things that upset you. But why are they bothering you so much? What did they reveal about you that you don't want to face?
 
ginvid said:
Working is over rated.

You are very young. You will have other girlfriends. You seem very nice. Her loss.
Find something you like doing that you've never done before. perfect something you have done before. Try to better yourself.

I dunno. Why do you think you are in a rut? I know you listed some things that upset you. But why are they bothering you so much? What did they reveal about you that you don't want to face?
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I guess its more because of the people around me. I feel like less of a person because I dont want to get a job. Like people look down on me because of it. But if I had the courage to go out and get one then I would.
 
go to college maybe? worry when u get to my age and are stuck in one lol
 
elusive moonwalker said:
go to college maybe? worry when u get to my age and are stuck in one lol
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Its not that easy. I was on a college course which ended up leaving for one reason or another. They only start college courses round here every September. There are the odd few that start in January, but im not going to do any old course.
 
Ouch. :( bad times.

I think what ya gotta do is look at 2010 in a positive light. If you view things negatively then it will seem like everythings going wrong.

I'm sorry to hear about your gf. I had a similar experience with my first bf last year too, I loved him and he left me. But what you gotta do is learn from it, I know it's tough, but it's the only way to help make things positive. And like ginvid said, her loss really. You are young, so you'll find someone :)

Work...hmm, I have to agree, it terrifies me as well. But, just take the fear and turn it into something else. Make it work to your advantage. Find a job that interests you. Are you looking for a full time job? Are you going to Uni? or College? (Soz for the questions lol).

aaand edit: Okay, are there no courses in Jan that appeal to you?
 
Im sorry to hear you feel like this! Loving and loosing people is the hardest thing in the world to get over i know! But what advise can you give someone about how to move on? I think everyone does it in there own way.

I dont know whats wrong with me! I feel like i just dont enjoy life at all! I have friends but i dont feel like i want them half the time! I dont know what it is! I feel like im not good at anythin and school is just lost on me the past year. I cant seem to set my mind to do or achieve anything i am stuck in a rut! I feel like somethings really missing out of my life thats making me like this! Sorry to sound so depressing buy, i dont know... :sigh:
 
L.T.D said:
Its not that easy. I was on a college course which ended up leaving for one reason or another. They only start college courses round here every September. There are the odd few that start in January, but im not going to do any old course.
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Hi L.T.D.,
It's perfectly normal you don't feel prepared to start a job.
 
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Aww, I'm sorry it's a rough time. I went through my first and only real break-up at age 18 (dumped painfully and unexpectedly) so I know how terrible that can feel! And my best friend (now 26) just broke up with her boyfriend three days ago -- I think it sucks at any age, but you'll get through it. I promise!


Is the job market really bad in the UK? I don't know if you have some other educational opprtunity other than a full-time university, but maybe there are some classes you could take to gain some new skills?

I wish you the best from the bottom of my heart. 2009 was a pretty crappy year for me job-wise and MJ-wise (obviously) but I have a feeling 2010, or I'm vowing to view this year more positively. I know year marks are arbitrary but it feels kind of nice to have a fresh start. I hope things gets better and that you can enjoy some of the little things in the meantime! :heart:
 
Sorry to hear about this time in your life dude :( Things will pick up eventually cos you're still a teenager. There are loads of people on here willing and able to help you through this.

"Keep The Faith" as Michael taught us.
 
Its not that easy. I was on a college course which ended up leaving for one reason or another. They only start college courses round here every September.
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yeah of course. sept. doh. if u dont want to go to college as u seem to be saying (might be wrong) or if u do maybe lok for a part time job until u can start a course. is there not a career u always fanced doing? did u do alevels at school are just left when u were 16. cause yeah as they say work is overated but at your age getting out and doing things involves money and unless u have a job or rich parents. not having money stops u from doing alot of things.maybe just look for something part time if getting a full time job scares you.
 
Is the job market really bad in the UK? I don't know if you have some other educational opprtunity other than a full-time university, but maybe there are some classes you could take to gain some new skills?
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tbh its always been bad unless u have qualifactions. most ppl over here toss it off a university/college until they are in their early 20's doing courses that wont really get them anywhere. the goverment like it as it keeps the jobless figures down and they can say how wonderful it is that so many ppl are at uni. so tbh if u are 18 and dont want to carry on with an education and dont fancy doing something like an apprentiship (sp) then there isnt much on offer out there other than your standard shop assistant type jobs
 
I know you say you don't feel ready to get a job, but really this is the key to changing your life. By that I mean, you'll meet new people, you'll have something to focus on and the experience of having any old job for now will make it easier for you when you decide what you really want to do. If you did decide to go to college then that'd be a good way to do it as well, but like someone said you need money to do things. Then when you have a job you can learn to drive and so on...
I know what it's like to be stuck in a rut, trust me, but the only person that can change it is you, and you'll feel so good when you do this. Make 2010 your year to turn your life around. And, we're all behind you. :hug:
As for the girl, heartbreak sucks. :( You'll find someone sometime. I hope it all works out for you.
 
I've done the whole gone to uni and got qualifications thing and still searching for that proper career job, the job market is so bad at the moment its insane. But having just a general job will help-it'll get you out, you'll meet more people, and have a lot more money coming in obviously. Its always best to be doing something like that than staying at home feeling sorry for yourself-I've been there and it never works. 2009 was so awful for all of us, make 2010 your year. As for the girlfriend pah, it sounds like she didn't deserve you anyway. You'll find someone a lot better.
 
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