'I've learnt that life is precious': Janet Jackson on the death of her brother Michael

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Moulin Rouge

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She’s battled through body hang-ups, two divorces and the death of her beloved brother Michael – but, Janet Jackson tells Daphne Lockyer, she’s finally found a ‘better space’


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'Every family has their issues, and my family is a lot closer than many people think,' says Janet


Janet Jackson is sporting a radical new hairstyle. Short and sharp, it’s teamed today with a tailored beige jacket – all brass buttons and little-drummer-girl epaulettes. On a less feminine woman, the look would be almost butch. But Janet, 44, offsets it with big kohl-lined Bambi eyes, a little upturned nose and frosted sugar-pink lips.

‘People have been surprised by my haircut,’ she says. ‘But it’s not the first time I’ve had it this short. The last time was in 1995 when Michael and I were at the MTV awards. We’d won Best Dance Video for our work on the song “Scream”.’

Ah, Michael Jackson…the big brother who was possibly the most famous person on the planet until his mysterious and shocking death in June last year. But in fairness, Janet has sold millions of records worldwide in her own right, garnered Grammys galore and seen many of her albums go multi-platinum. Plus, of course, she has a burgeoning career as an actress, the reason for our interview today.

And while the new haircut has not attracted quite as much attention as 2004’s ‘Nipplegate’ (the ‘wardrobe malfunction’ that led to an exposed breast during a Super Bowl performance with Justin Timberlake), it’s been featured everywhere in the press during her stay in London to promote her new film, Why Did I Get Married Too?
‘I don’t know what the fuss is about,’ she says – apparently forgetting that ‘fuss’ has surrounded every aspect of the Jackson clan’s lives for as long as anyone can remember.

Not that mention of the clan – and specifically, Michael – is on the cards today. I’ve been told in advance that there’ll be no talk of ‘Michael’s passing’ or the family in which Janet grew up, and Janet’s manager is in the room to keep the conversation on message. But Michael’s ghost is ever present in the suite at London’s Dorchester where we meet. After all, his is the hotel he favoured when in London (apparently throwing an ice-cream-and-jelly party here in 2005, dressed as Mickey Mouse while his children Prince Michael, Paris and ‘Blanket’ were Peter Pan, Tinker Bell and Captain Hook).

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Janet (front centre) with some of the Jackson clan in 1974


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With the family at a memorial event for Michael in July 2009


Besides, the movie and the Michael topic aren’t exactly unrelated: Janet was just three days into filming when she learned of his death. Work on the movie, a sequel that picks up the story of four couples who’ve been friends for years and are now each experiencing marital problems, was halted so Janet could attend the funeral. When she returned to the role of Patricia, a psychologist and self-help guru whose seemingly perfect marriage is on the rocks, she turned in an emotionally raw performance that staggered her co-stars, including Tyler Perry, also the film’s writer and director. In one scene, she smashes up the marital home with a golf club, tears coursing down her face.

‘Some scenes really gave me the chance to release the emotions I was going through. It was very draining, but it helped me to get through,’ she has admitted. She adds, ‘For a scene like that you leave your vanity at the door and that wasn’t a problem for me, even though it might not be how people view me. I was ready to show that vulnerability.’

Janet was blessed, she says, by the support of an ensemble cast, including Jill Scott, Sharon Leal, Tasha Smith and Malik Yoba (who plays her husband, Gavin), who had already forged strong friendships during the making of the original 2007 movie Why Did I Get Married? ‘We really bonded on that set,’ says Janet. ‘And even after filming we stayed in touch. When Tyler told us he’d written the sequel we were genuinely excited to be working together again. It really felt like family.’

And they were all intrigued to learn where the sequel would take their characters. ‘At the end of the last film you can see some small flaws appearing in Patricia’s marriage,’ says Janet. ‘But this time we see the relationship going into meltdown.

‘I think maybe it helped that I’ve been through the pain of divorce myself twice,’ she admits. Her first marriage, to her childhood sweetheart, American soul singer James DeBarge, lasted only a few months and was annulled in 1985.
Her second, to songwriter Rene Elizondo, lasted eight years but ended in divorce in 2000. ‘You use the experiences that you have to help you play the roles.’

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However, a funeral scene in which Janet’s character was meant to speak was cut because the director felt it would be too close to home. ‘[Tyler] was on my side. He was constantly checking up on me,’ she says. ‘There isn’t a day that goes by even now that I don’t think about Michael, where we don’t all think about him.’ But, she adds, ‘Right now, I’m in a better space and I’m moving on with my life. At times it can be hard. But I’m growing and learning and loving. I’m enjoying my life very much and I’ve learnt that life is precious.’

The ‘loving’ bit throws up a whole other area of interest. Janet split from her long-term love, record producer Jermaine Dupri, a year ago, but was recently photographed having been wined and dined by Qatari industrialist Wissam Al Mana. Though neither has confirmed their relationship, he’s reported to have showered her with gifts including a Bentley convertible and a Cartier ‘Love’ bracelet.
At 35, he is nine years younger than Janet – not that she looks a day over 30. ‘To be honest with you, I still feel that I’m very much a kid inside. Yes, I’m 44 and enjoying many aspects of that. I like the feeling of maturity it gives me. But at the same time, I feel a huge connection with, say, 20-year-olds, like the dancers I work with – we do a great deal of bonding. And a lot of my nieces and nephews are in their 20s, so we’re close. Maybe it’s the kid in them speaking to the kid in me. They’re young adults, still learning. They have that energy and love of life, and I think I still have that too.’

Janet has more than 25 nieces and nephews, having been born the youngest of nine siblings. As a small child being raised in LA, she saw Michael and her other brothers blazing a trail as the original Motown boy band, the Jackson 5. She could have been intimidated by the success of hits such as ‘I’ll Be There’ and ‘ABC’, but instead, from the age of seven, she was carving out her own career, performing first with her siblings and later securing roles as an actress in US TV shows such as Diff’rent Strokes and Fame. She was just 16 when her father Joseph secured a contract for her with A&M records. Though she later fired him as her manager, she credits him with putting her on a path that led to her becoming a music icon in her own right.

Much has been written about the Jacksons’ allegedly dysfunctional family life – the disciplinarian Joe hellbent on turning his offspring into a moneymaking industry at the expense of their childhood. Janet doesn’t dispute that discipline played a huge part in her upbringing. ‘Yes, Dad was definitely a disciplinarian,’ she smiles, enjoying the understatement. ‘I’ve had discipline all my life but, actually, I’m thankful now for it. I don’t see discipline as a negative at all. I see it as a positive.’ As for the accusation of dysfunction: ‘Isn’t dysfunction the case in most families, to a certain extent? Every family has their issues, and my family is a lot closer than many people think.’

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Performing on the 2010 American Idol final


She is close to her siblings’ children. ‘I get texts and e-mails all day long from them… Aunty Janet this and Aunty Janet that. I’m the aunt that they come to when they think they’re going to get in trouble. You know, “I just got a tattoo, or a piercing. And my dad saw it last night and he wants to choke me! Can you talk to him, Aunty Janet?”’

And who better to fight their corner than Janet? She has many tattoos – including one of Mickey and Minnie Mouse engaged in a sex act, emblazoned somewhere around her bikini line.

More obviously on view today are symbols from the Ghanaian Ashanti tribe – one on each wrist. ‘This one appeared on my album The Velvet Rope and it’s very important to me,’ she says, holding it out for inspection. ‘It’s about going into your past and dealing with it so that you can move forward. And this one on the other wrist is the symbol for discipline – very important in my life.’

You suspect she might be less of a disciplinarian as a parent herself. And she isn’t ruling out the possibility of motherhood one day. ‘Yes, at some point. I’d like to. But my view is that if it’s God’s plan for me to have children then it’s going to happen. I’m not panicking. It would be very, very sweet if I did have children. The icing on the cake. And I like sweet things. But it doesn’t feel essential.’

It surely helps that, physically, she has rarely been in better shape. Like many women, she admits that her weight can yoyo (she is smaller now than when she filmed Why Did I Get Married Too?). She’s been dieting and working out, she says, for her next project: another film with Tyler Perry, called For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf, starring Whoopi Goldberg and Macy Gray.

She has also written a soon-to-be-published book, True You, which is part autobiography, part self-help. ‘It’s about the weight loss and the weight gain, and people ask me about the nutrition side of things all the time. But I wanted to take it a step further and talk about my childhood and some of the self-esteem issues I had, so I tell anecdotes about what I went through. I wish I’d had a book like this when I was younger.’

It turns out that her own youth was marred by a ‘little fat girl’ complex. ‘I wasn’t a heavy kid, but I thought I was. And that was what I saw when I looked in the mirror. It was something that was driven into my brain, maybe from being too much in the spotlight. And when that happens to kids they can become either anorexic or emotional eaters. Food becomes a really emotional subject.’
About 12 years ago, she says, she started to explore these and other personal issues that were spoiling her life. ‘And one of the reasons I relate so much to Patricia in Why Did I Get Married Too? is that, like her, in the past I was always there for my friends, but when it came to my own issues I didn’t want to look at them at all.’

Her 1997 album The Velvet Rope, she says, was all about the voyage of self-discovery she embarked on. ‘It was about leaving behind the side of me that didn’t like myself very much. It was about learning to accept myself, and it is still work in progress. Now I’m OK, and on good days I even like myself. Getting to a point of loving myself is the next stage and maybe I am not quite there yet.’

Later that evening, after our interview, Janet is on the red carpet, looking stunning in a little grey silk Lanvin dress for a special Brixton screening of Why Did I Get Married Too? Descending from the limo, she is greeted by shrieking followers waving autograph books and holding out their arms to her. One carries a ‘We Love Janet’ placard.

Janet smiles. She’s feeling the love, all right. And as her older brother might have told her, even if you’re not always entirely crazy about yourself, there are times when the love of the rest of the world will do.

Why Did I Get Married Too? will be released on 3 September

Janet Jackson on the death of her brother Michael: 'I've learnt that life is precious' | Mail Online
 
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It hurts me they talk about Michael. I know they are family but they either go back to the drug crap or just mention his name and as you know, some fans are still sensitive. It physically hurts me...
 
I'm not sure how old you folks are but I learned after too many family deaths over the last 5 years in my family that putting these passed people out of your mind as much as is possible is the best way to heal.

It does not help everyone to constantly think about what has been lost. This can be very detrimental to a persons mind. It is reality that life goes on. It doesn't make it easy but it helps eventually.

Try and show some compassion regardless of your own feelings and remember we are all products of our upbringing and life stories.

Mike R
 
All members are aware of the new rules for this part of the board. Included in that list was the rule of not going into family members threads just to post off topic rants and derailing threads. The members I contact, consider this a first warning. Two more, and you will lose access to this part of the forum completely.

Thank you.

Now we can get back to topic about Janet and her article.
 
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Also would just like to add, you don't have to keep all Janet news in one thread. This is the section for family news, so post as you have been doing.
 
i wonder if, maybe, at least part of the frustration her character displayed in the movie sequel came from the fact that her husband character in the movie was named...uhm..Gavin? just wondering.

and...well..Mickey and Minnie in a sex act? perhaps the kid in Janet really grew up..lol

i'd almost say that that tattoo is real irony, but then, Disney was already there, in my opinion, by now.
 
Not that mention of the clan – and specifically, Michael – is on the cards today. I’ve been told in advance that there’ll be no talk of ‘Michael’s passing’ or the family in which Janet grew up, and Janet’s manager is in the room to keep the conversation on message. But Michael’s ghost is ever present in the suite at London’s Dorchester where we meet. After all, his is the hotel he favoured when in London (apparently throwing an ice-cream-and-jelly party here in 2005, dressed as Mickey Mouse while his children Prince Michael, Paris and ‘Blanket’ were Peter Pan, Tinker Bell and Captain Hook).

How ironic......how is it Oprah and Robyn Roberts did'nt get this memo?

However, a funeral scene in which Janet’s character was meant to speak was cut because the director felt it would be too close to home. ‘[Tyler] was on my side. He was constantly checking up on me,’ she says. ‘There isn’t a day that goes by even now that I don’t think about Michael, where we don’t all think about him.’ But, she adds, ‘Right now, I’m in a better space and I’m moving on with my life. At times it can be hard. But I’m growing and learning and loving. I’m enjoying my life very much and I’ve learnt that life is precious.’

Okay, I take it then that this interview was done back when the movie was premiered in London and not recently? 'cause every article about this movie has this statement included as well as others.
 
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How ironic......how is it Oprah and Robyn Roberts did'nt get this memo?

Because Janet had to speak about it at some time and this short interview here was supposed to be focusing on the movie. Everyone wanted to know how Janet felt about her brother death late last year because she hadn't done a proper interview so about 5 months after the incident she gave a big interview which was good to get out of the way and oprah well she's oprah..she's always pulling things out od people so of course she was going to talk about michael with janet.
 
StacyJ, that is quite enough! I'm not sure how many times the rules of this section have to be posted before some of you realise and keep to them. This is your last warning.
 
Guys you were already warned by Stacey yet I've had to delete posts after she made that warning. That's quite enough thank you, stop with the insults against each other and mocking staff decisions. We have not come to this decision easily and we have had no choice. Please respect that. Thank you.
 
I'm not so much Sick of hearing about Janet (I mean because, where gonna be hearing about her for as long as she's active in the buisness) as I am sick of hearing about how she's "moving on with her life". I mean, thats grrrrrrrrreat, lol...she should be, MJ was not her husband, or her father, or her child... He was her brother, a brother whom she (personally admited) was not close to in the later years. I think people get it lol, she "moved on" RIGHT AFTER the incident for goodness sakes. In five years, we'll probably still be hearing about how Janet's "Finally moved on (oh and taken control) with and of her life". I'm more interested in hearing about how the kids are doing and Kathrine.

And that goes for all of the sibling to be compeletly honest...

Anyway, carry on.
 
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I'm not so much Sick of hearing about Janet (I mean because, where gonna be hearing about her for as long as she's active in the buisness) as I am sick of hearing about how she's "moving on with her life". I mean, thats grrrrrrrrreat, lol...she should be, MJ was not her husband, or her father, or her child... He was her brother, a brother whom she (personally admited) was not close to in the later years. I think people get it lol, she "moved on" RIGHT AFTER the incident for goodness sakes. In five years, we'll probably still be hearing about how Janet's "Finally moved on (oh and taken control) with and of her life". I'm more interested in hearing about how the kids are doing and Kathrine.

And that goes for all of the sibling to be compeletly honest...

Anyway, carry on.

I understand what you're saying. To have a bunch of interviews done within close proximity of each other, highlighting that 'moving on with my life' statement, just seems to be a bit much to me. But then again, when you're doing press, much of the same questions are asked and answered in the same manner so I guess that just compounds everything.
 
I am just plain sick and tired of Janet Jackson.

I hear ya.. I'm feeling the same...

oh.. I hear another cow being milked...........drip - drop..

ever since that interview with Robin Roberts... there is a cloud over the name of Janet Jackson to me...

I know its her brother and she loved him.. but why do I feel that ever since Michael's death... everything that Janet is doing is done by strategizing her career move on how MJ's death helps her...

........ummm? I'm just say............
 
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^^maybe she feels it her time to shine again now that the press gas forgiven her wordropbe malfunction...I dunno ..... to be honest though, I do agree with you all about how she is taking her brothers death in stride.:huh:
 
^^maybe she feels it her time to shine again now that the press gas forgiven her wordropbe malfunction...I dunno ..... to be honest though, I do agree with you all about how she is taking her brothers death in stride.:huh:

Yes...MJ's death has made her mainstream again. She was blacklisted after the whole superbowl drama and never recovered-careerwise.

Now, no one's asking her about Justin exposing her tities to billions around the world.

While moving on, she should be thankful to MJ for this.
 
Isn't she angry at the media or Murray? Even if they were not as close as they used to be people treated Michael terribly. Now that he died people say how much they love him. Where were they before? I hear others in the family mention this. The way she comes across is cold to me. I get that she has moved on and life does go on but her brother is gone and her niece and nephews don't have their father anymore. There in no justice for Michael. I am not saying she shouldn't go on with her life but I don't know how else to describe it but it just rubs me the wrong way what she says at times. Everybody is different.
 
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I'm not so much Sick of hearing about Janet (I mean because, where gonna be hearing about her for as long as she's active in the buisness) as I am sick of hearing about how she's "moving on with her life". I mean, thats grrrrrrrrreat, lol...she should be, MJ was not her husband, or her father, or her child... He was her brother, a brother whom she (personally admited) was not close to in the later years. I think people get it lol, she "moved on" RIGHT AFTER the incident for goodness sakes. In five years, we'll probably still be hearing about how Janet's "Finally moved on (oh and taken control) with and of her life". I'm more interested in hearing about how the kids are doing and Kathrine.

And that goes for all of the sibling to be compeletly honest...

Anyway, carry on.

I think is quiet unfair to say she moved on straight away after MJ's passing, I mean she waited months to come out and say anything, not being close to MJ in the later part of his life, wouldn't make the pain any less, it could make it worse infact. Moving on or saying life goes on doesn't mean shes over greiving for Michael, or doesn't care about him.
 
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